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The Little Things

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This may be more relevant over here in the UK and other countries than US, and maybe more something I imagine rather than any kind of trigger.


I was chatting with a friend I have made in the supermarket today, and mentioned that I was working on travelling down to see my son on the Isle of Wight, some 200 miles away (this is a fair distance for many here). She asked who did the driving, me or my husband. I answered myself (as my partner does not drive). Perhaps not an issue these days, as it would have been in the past. It is general though for men to do more of the driving than women.


Probably no problem really, but does make one think!



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That's probably true on this side of the pond as well although less so than it used to be. It is unfortunately one of those "who wears the pants in the family" type of things that I hope disappears in time.

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Was just thinking, you can hang your painted nails out the right side driver's window as you move along, waving to the passer byes.... 😊 Sounds like a nice drive Tracy.




C -



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Josie Beth

It’s actually kind of dependent, unfortunately, on certain classes of people these days. Often when a woman drives she is single or if her significant other is in the passenger side they might have no license, criminal background, or a suspended license. I’m not trying to reinforce any stereotype, however there’s a lot of that in certain neighborhoods. I’m definitely not interested in any guy who is questionable. I’m being much more selective than I used to be. I don’t mind driving at all. It’s nice to be pampered though and there is a certain romantic quality to having a man drive, open the door, take me by the hand while I’m stepping out. Like having my own princess carriage. For me it depends on the occasion, fancy dates or maybe a ball would make that more appropriate. Just going to the supermarket is not really a reason. Driving long distance sometimes dictates switching seats to get there safely. Here it depends on many factors but for the most part the stigma of women driving is not much of an issue anymore.

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My wife and I each have our own car. When we take her car, she usually drives. And when we take my truck, I usually drive. But for any sort of a long trip it’s usually me that gets stuck driving. Also anytime we drive very late I drive. I have been blessed with the joy of not being able to sleep in a car. Closing my eyes in a moving vehicle makes me nauseous. 🤢 I’ve been the overnight driver as long as I can remember. 

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My partner has never driven. I am Ok with it, and in my last job I regularly drove between 100 and 140 miles a day, but I do get very tired, so have to be careful. It is one of the reasons why I finished in that job as the department service area was subject to a massive increase in area with a new contract. It was the assumption that everyone would be able to travel such distances. Roads here have improved a bit with increased motorway routes (assuming one avoids rush hours), so journey times are reduced. Countering that there is increased traffic nowdays.


I do agree with Josie though, in that, people are likely to make assumptions.



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    I now do virtually all of the driving for us.  My wife's disability makes it more difficult for her and while she is capable i'm probably a better driver.

     I recently hit a deer with our new car(less than 500 miles).  Ouch....but fortunately no noticeable damage.  I called the police anyway as it was nighttime and i wasn't able to make a good inspection.  It is amazing how much nicer they are to a woman than they used to be when i presented male.  My purse had flown off the front passenger seat to a space below the dashboard. No License!   Not a problem, no ticket!   What a difference!  

    I have fun driving the dump truck as well.  Women smile and men seem to simply give me space.





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1 hour ago, Kirsten said:

My wife and I each have our own car. When we take her car, she usually drives. And when we take my truck, I usually drive. But for any sort of a long trip it’s usually me that gets stuck driving. Also anytime we drive very late I drive. I have been blessed with the joy of not being able to sleep in a car. Closing my eyes in a moving vehicle makes me nauseous. 🤢 I’ve been the overnight driver as long as I can remember. 


Kirsten, are we the same people???  It's exactly as I would have written it.  Right down to the truck.  And the sleeping in a moving vehicle.  Although it's also a trust factor with me regarding sleeping while my spouse drives.    She can fall asleep in less than the blink of an eye.  She can fall asleep walking!!  She's a better driver than me, but that sleep thing scares me. 

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Lol that’s funny. My wife thinks she’s the best driver in the world, but I’m usually pretty scared with her. Nothing to do with sleep though. She just seems like she’s never paying any attention to what’s going on. But she’s never had a ticket or accident so that trumps me. 

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In the US, there's just too much power given up when you can't drive.  I wasn't willing to be in that position - as someone who is currently a phenotypic female, I feel all concessions of power very keenly - so I got my license.


I take driving very seriously - I'm in a multi-ton missile, after all, and it's definitely a lethal weapon.  After I got my license, I took some high-performance driving schools so I could better learn how to control it.  I bicycle or ride a motorcycle for commuting, though. 

My husband was a race driver and a high-performance driving instructor when he was young, so his awareness and smoothness are pleasing.  Being a passenger with anyone else puts my teeth on edge.

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I'm glad to hear you take driving seriously.  So many people don't.   I raced cars for years and I am a terrible passenger at speed.  

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So, you all don't get the fire team disease? It is when you are riding in a vehicle for 10 minutes and you are asleep. A term that I learned in the service.


Anyway I am the usual one to drive. especially in bad weather. It come from PTSD from an incident that happened in the service. I do however let my wife drive when I am tired. Other than that I drive. I am a very nervous passenger.



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