What is needed for a complete gender change?

[Wyattrans123]

I am thinking about changing from male to female and i am wondering what types of surgery there are? Like for breast augmentation what would be a good size to start with? I am pretty thin, so i was thinking about a size b is that too small? Also what size is normal for my bottom? How painful are the surgeries? Would i have to take time off work? What followup surgeries are there? I want to make myself look pretty but not so dramatic that it is clearly noticeable that i am trans. How much daily medicine and shots do i have to take? Where is the best place to get surgery around iowa? What gender will i be attracted to after surgery? What is the best age to get gender change surgery?

[Cyndee]

Hi ya, you might start by looking here

 

https://www.wpath.org/publications/soc

 

C -

[Jani]

I think you are putting the horse before the cart since there is so much to accomplish before therapists and doctors would sign off on surgeries.  Hormone treatment is a life long commitment.  I don't know of any surgeons in Iowa that perform GRS.  When I was staying in the recovery apartments of my surgeon there was a woman there that had come from Iowa.  This was in Pennsylvania.   Surgery will not change your attraction to one gender or the other!   There are many requirements for surgery but you'd have to be at least 18 on the low end and not so old that you're dead on the other end.

 

Look into seeing a gender therapist.  It sounds scary but only because you haven't yet.  Its all good if this is what you think you want/need to do.  Its not a sprint race but a long distance marathon.  

 

Cheers, Jani  

[Susan]

Hey there. I agree with jani. You need to do research on it and see a therapist. which btw jani, i have been seeing a therapist since november around thanksgiving i think i started and i have been seeing him every two weeks. it has been really nice to have him to talk to. hugs all!! Susan?

[VickySGV]

Lets list things out here on the surgery issues to give an idea. 

 

GCS (Gender Confirmation Surgery)  1 to 3 year wait for most competent surgeons after paying a deposit fee, even with insurance.  12 to 18 months recovery time with first 6 months needing multiple daily dilation sessions which are messy and go from 2 to 8 on pain scales on a daily basis.  Limits on work for 6 months and no sex for 3 to 7 months (various surgeons).  Embarrassing problems in restrooms for 6 - 9 months with spraying and aim of urine.  Strange feeling in surgical zone 6 to 12 months as nerves re-connect. 9 to 12 months for complete healing and sensation in the clitoral, area.  About 60% of patients have some expected healing problems and infections are likely occur without fault of doctor or patient.  Pain meds are an addiction hazard but are needed.

 

Breast augmentation --  3 months to a year waiting time with a surgeon who will treat Trans patients, many will not treat us, and so travel will be an added cost.  Minimum of 6 weeks of limited activity (pay cuts)  and possibility of healing problems including infection or wound separation.  After a certain period of time set by the doctor daily massage that is vigorous and painful at times to keep the breast pliable.  Problems with future mammograms and cancer detection.  Chance of implants "migrating" and causing other problems.  Special Bras needed during healing are expensive. Pain is a huge issue, and most doctors will be cautious about heavy medication, so pain may not be fully medicated.

 

FFS (Feminizing Facial Surgery)  May need three sessions or more depending on what is deemed necessary.  Each session will be on a 3 to 7 month waiting list.  Three to six weeks of disability and wearing bandages that do not look feminine at all.  Depending on your own body's healing system, the surgery can undo itself and you will not end up with the effect you desire.  You will be signing a waiver of responsibility for most of that sort of thing, since it is out of the surgeon's control.

 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I will leave it at that for now.  I have had surgery and can tell you what it will not do for you.  It will not fulfill your dreams to any really large degree.  It will not solve problems that have existed in your life.  It will not assure that you love yourself or that others will love you.  The first few days after an operation people will be nice and kind to you and give you compliments on your courage or your recovery, but after a few weeks they get back to their lives while you are still recovering and if pressed to keep their attention, they begin to call you a lazy dog who needs to get a life.  I have been in this community for two decades and am one of the standard bearers, not a horrible exception.  This is  not the stuff of dreams, it is the stuff of pure NEED to enable your survival, and some do not survive it. 

 

 

[Raven1981]

9 hours ago, Wyattrans123 said:

I am thinking about changing from male to female and i am wondering what types of surgery there are? Like for breast augmentation what would be a good size to start with? I am pretty thin, so i was thinking about a size b is that too small? Also what size is normal for my bottom? How painful are the surgeries? Would i have to take time off work? What followup surgeries are there? I want to make myself look pretty but not so dramatic that it is clearly noticeable that i am trans. How much daily medicine and shots do i have to take? Where is the best place to get surgery around iowa? What gender will i be attracted to after surgery? What is the best age to get gender change surgery?

 

I will have to agree with everyone previously.  You are jumping way ahead of yourself and surgeries will not fix what you are looking for.  There is a certain path that usually has to be followed for not just legal reason but also for your health as well.  

 

Lets start with hormones, since you are wanting to go from Male to Female there is alot more cons than pros.  Like blood clots, cancer, DVT, sickness.  It is important to see the right doctor like an Endocrinologist  or Hormone specialist cause you have to do regular Lab checks on your hormone levels, how are you feeling.  Usually there are some individual that do not go for surgeries cause the hormones will change enough to not give you the dysphoria that is there in the first place.  Now for the pros on hormones, it will change your emotions and make you more emotional and redistribute your fat and stimulate your hair growth, start breast development and for some in the Trans community that hormones is just enough.

 

Then there is all the legal stuff, like picking a name and changing your name legally and updating your new name on your SS card and state ID and birth certificate, passport, then updating your name everywhere else.

 

Then pricing for all this gets very expensive and this is a life changing event and will have to be going on with you for life, even after surgeries, you will need to be on hormones for the rest of your life.

 

Here in PHX the doctor that I am planning on going to see for FFS has a year wait list and the average cost for FFS in the PHX area for the doctor I am seeing is around 20k, GCS can be the same amount as FFS, Breast augmentation can be around 10k, Oreamotiey can be 5k

 

Then there is the cost for legal name change, birth certificate, passport, new wardrobe, makeup, hormones on a monthly basis, seeing a specialist doctor for your hormone checkup's.  

 

It is very suggested to start with finding a Gender Therapist in your area to go see.  If this is truly who you are that you believe you are then you need to see a gender therapist in your area and to talk to them and ask them the same questions and to see if you have dysphoria.

 

Being Trans is not a choice, but something that is much needed like how Vicky mentioned for survival and to be able to function correctly.

 

There is alot more to Transitioning but I am leaving it with this information.  If this is you, please look at finding a gender therapist and research, google search WPATH.

 

Thanks

[VickySGV]

15 hours ago, VickySGV said:

Breast augmentation --  3 months to a year waiting time with a surgeon who will treat Trans patients, many will not treat us, and so travel will be an added cost.  Minimum of 6 weeks of limited activity (pay cuts)  and possibility of healing problems including infection or wound separation.  After a certain period of time set by the doctor daily massage that is vigorous and painful at times to keep the breast pliable.  Problems with future mammograms and cancer detection.  Chance of implants "migrating" and causing other problems.  Special Bras needed during healing are expensive. Pain is a huge issue, and most doctors will be cautious about heavy medication, so pain may not be fully medicated.

 

Just learned from a medical friend who had implants 10 years ago that she is going to have to have her old implants taken out and replaced, and in 10 to 12 years will have to do it again. Something to add on to the negatives.  This is not just her, it is everyone with implants who values their life.

[Wyattrans123]

I am not worried about the pain, i would rather live my life as the gender i feel like i am, i don’t want to live my being sad

[Charlize]

Please take a deep breath not forgetting to breath out.  Transition is a journey which took me years and which continues even today despite living openly for years.   

While we tend to focus on medical intervention often a self acceptance is the hardest hurdle.  Moving around the world as myself without fear has been the most important part of the journey for me.  

Therapy was critical and my time here helped me a great deal.  At one point i remember a member saying she "had my back".  That meant a great deal to me.

You're not alone.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Cyndee]

6 hours ago, Wyattrans123 said:

I am not worried about the pain, i would rather live my life as the gender i feel like i am, i don’t want to live my being sad

 

Many words of truth and pain above, it's a long road, and there is no instant fix, like snap your fingers and you are a girl that everyone accepts. Like Vicky said above, some don't survive this process, people die over GD, the depression can be deadly, that's why we are here, because we've been there, did I say depression is deadly ? Even if your body can survive the process of gender transition and surgeries, there are many aspects of this journey that is darn right depressing, and that can be the biggest risk long term. I would simply venture a guess that based on your location (Iowa), that you are more at risk for gender related depressions, then say someone in suburban California. Yes geographic social climate can be a big factor in how things turn out for you.

 

You will need professional help to medically transition. For the MTF,  you might not consider breast augmentation without starting HRT first, does that make sense ?

 

Take good care, GD is nasty stuff, and is darn right depressing at times.

 

C -

 

 

[Linde]

On 1/10/2019 at 5:09 PM, VickySGV said:

 

Just learned from a medical friend who had implants 10 years ago that she is going to have to have her old implants taken out and replaced, and in 10 to 12 years will have to do it again. Something to add on to the negatives.  This is not just her, it is everyone with implants who values their life.

Are you sure?  What is the reason that they need to be taken out?  What implants did she have.  By the time line, i would guess it were saline filled bags, and they can leak a little, but it should not be any health problem, just the boobs get smaller over time.

 

It depends pretty much on the type of augmentation, the  type of implant and the individual if the implants have to be exchanged every 10 years or not.

[Linde]

Just now, Linde said:

Are you sure?  What is the reason that they need to be taken out?  What implants did she have.  By the time line, i would guess it were saline filled bags, and they can leak a little, but it should not be any health problem, just the boobs get smaller over time.

 

It depends pretty much on the type of augmentation, the  type of implant and the individual if the implants have to be exchanged every 10 years or not.

And to amend this, one should not get any implants until hormone induced breast growth is over (between 2 to 5 years, depending on the individual).

[Beverly]

Your first step is to find a therapist who specializes in gender identification therapy. Here's a link: www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/transgender. After you've seen the therapist for while to confirm that transition is what you want, a physician who does medical transition therapy will see you, so you can start hormone replacement therapy (HRT). You have to be on HRT for one year before a WPATH surgeon will consider you for gender affirmation surgery. It's about a two year process minimum and there are protocols that must be followed. And there are waiting lists and insurance approvals, unless you can self fund the $50,000 to $100,000 process.

[RithiaAllen]

4 hours ago, Beverly said:

Your first step is to find a therapist who specializes in gender identification therapy. Here's a link: www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/transgender. After you've seen the therapist for while to confirm that transition is what you want, a physician who does medical transition therapy will see you, so you can start hormone replacement therapy (HRT). You have to be on HRT for one year before a WPATH surgeon will consider you for gender affirmation surgery. It's about a two year process minimum and there are protocols that must be followed. And there are waiting lists and insurance approvals, unless you can self fund the $50,000 to $100,000 process.

If all the stars align it can be done in a year . I screamed through the process but it required me to work my butt off and in the end my resolve was tested.