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Painted Fingernail Ban Temporarily Lifted ?


Susan R

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I have an agreement with my wonderful wife that I can have my nails as long as I want until we have a guest or family over for a visit. I grow them out and then when someone comes over it's time to get out the clippers.  Well, our daughter and son-in-law who had planned to drive here this weekend had something come up so I didn't need to cut them.  One other thing, until I'm out to everyone I'm never allowed to paint my finger nails....toe nails are ok, no problem.  Well tonight, I decided to "dress up to the nines" in a little celebration that I didn't have to cut my nails until next week.  After I was all done dressing, doing my hair and makeup, my wife came up to me and asked, how about I paint your nails just for tonight and part of tomorrow?  You can imagine my excitement and answer being that I love long beautiful nails so much.

The polish is nothing special, just some $7 drugstore nail polish but it feels like a million bucks to me.  I haven't painted my fingernail in over 30 years so this was a real treat.

 

Susan R?

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I like the color and they look beautiful Susan, very happy for you :)

 

Hugs

 

Cynthia -

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Thank you all for your kind comments.  You are all simply the best! 

@DeeDee @tracy_j @Willow @Kirsten @Cyndee @SaraAW @Jani @killjoyaiden

6 mos ago, If you would've told me I'd be posting online pictures of my long painted nails, I would've asked what planet you're from.  I just love all these changes and just can't help myself!

 

Susan R?

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They're lovely, Susan! I grew my nails out and painted them in a neutral color before I officially "came out." They and my pierced ears were quite the conversation starter. It's such a shame you have to put them up.

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1 hour ago, Beverly said:

They're lovely, Susan! I grew my nails out and painted them in a neutral color before I officially "came out." They and my pierced ears were quite the conversation starter. It's such a shame you have to put them up.

Thanks @Beverly, @Ashlee and @killjoyaiden  I realize it's going to take time for my wife to transition along with me.  We're going to be with ppl in an hour or so that I haven't come out to yet, so as of a couple hours ago, I'm back to my "manly hands".  I can't believe how hard it was to finally sit down and start removing the polish & cut them back.  I actually procrastinated and experienced a moment of GD right then.   I looked at my wife right after and jokingly said, "I finally feel like a REAL man!"  She looked at my chest and chuckled.  At least I gave her a good laugh.

 

Susan R?

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3 hours ago, Susan R said:

I looked at my wife right after and jokingly said, "I finally feel like a REAL man!"  She looked at my chest and chuckled.  At least I gave her a good laugh.

 

Susan R?

LOL! A sense of humor in transition is a good thing. Don't forget to remove your fake lashes and tuck your slip in. Thin eye liner I forgot to remove in my haste to get ready did me in at a graduation party for my nephew. It actually served as a catalyst for coming out to the whole family shortly thereafter. The back and forth is not without peril! :rolleyes:

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Just now, Beverly said:

It actually served as a catalyst for coming out to the whole family shortly thereafter. The back and forth is not without peril! :rolleyes:

 

Oh the signals that can and do slip out ?

 

Hugs

 

C -

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1 hour ago, Beverly said:

The back and forth is not without peril! :rolleyes:

I'm used to it now because of my past...living as both man and woman but it still doesn't prevent every mistake.  It usually means it's more costly if I make one.

 

1 hour ago, Cyndee said:

Oh the signals that can and do slip out ?

I've made a few mistakes recently.  My son-in-law came over without calling to get his laptop OS installed.  I sat there with my very long (unpainted) nails trying to type worrying about what he would think if he saw my nails.  Oh, the clicking sound made me cringe every key stroke.  He eventually looked over and saw my long nails tapping away.  My wife quietly laughed.  I looked over at her and gave HER the evil eye.  I was very embarrassed but I got thru it.  My son-in-law said nothing about my nails that day (to me at least).  My daughter and the entire family came over the next weekend.  My daughter kept looking at my hands.  I knew she was told because she was persistent in looking for my nails.  Luckily, I had trimmed them back a bit before they arrived but they were still a little longer than normal.  I have no idea what they think but they had obviously had a discussion about it.

 

Susan R?

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6 hours ago, Susan R said:

I have no idea what they think but they had obviously had a discussion about it.

 

Susan R?

 

Oh wow Susan I sense the day approaches when the HRT and other factors start to leak through even more and what was unsaid will have to come out in the open in some form.

 

Best to you dear

 

C -

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2 hours ago, Cyndee said:

Oh wow Susan I sense the day approaches when the HRT and other factors start to leak through even more and what was unsaid will have to come out in the open in some form.

Yes, I agree.  I'm at the point where I wear tight undershirts and compression undershirts around them now  I am slowly trying to convey this to my wife.  She (and I to a lesser extent) is hesitant to let the kids/grandkids know.  I have such a great relationship with the kids and grandkids and shes worried it could change that.  I actually talked about it last night when I was making that post that I'm not getting any younger and the kids should know who I really am..the real me, for better or worse.  She understands but it's still very hard.

 

Susan R?

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Yes, these are the fine details to work out with your wife for sure Susan, such as the timing and how much information should be shared if any, as to maintain your already wonderful relationships . Definitely a go slow approach with much consultation in these delicate areas, sounds like you're on topic with her. I came out to our daughters when they were teens, even though they may have suspect something was up earlier. There were several rocky periods, mostly revolving worrying over what their friends might say, or how it would affect them. Now I am happy to say both relationships are well and I can be totally truthful and open with them, took a long time, the relationships did evolve, they are much older and mature now.

 

Best wishes in your family setting Susan, especially with the little ones. There is a wonderful advantage to living authentically, being honest and transparent with those you love, it's healthy.

 

Hugs

 

C -

 

 

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3 hours ago, Cyndee said:

Now I am happy to say both relationships are well and I can be totally truthful and open with them, took a long time, the relationships did evolve, they are much older and mature now.

My daughters are extremely LGBTQ friendly, two of the three girls have been personally involved in that community.  The third one has in-laws with gay children so she is very accepting too.  I remind my wife of this but she says, "It's a little different when it hits home...their reaction to you being a woman my differ from what you might expect."  In some regard, I agree.  But like you say, living authentically with loved ones is healthy and important to me.

 

Susan R?

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6 hours ago, Susan R said:

She (and I to a lesser extent) is hesitant to let the kids/grandkids know.  I have such a great relationship with the kids and grandkids and shes worried it could change that.

  

Hi Susan!

By no means am I suggesting this is what every trans person should do, but I would like to share my own thought process and experience. I felt like I was keeping the real me, the best me, from all of my family members by not disclosing and living openly as me to them. They only knew an unhappy impostor posing as someone who wasn't real. I don't have children of my own. My nieces and nephews and their children are like my children and grandchildren. When I came out, they all embraced and love their aunt Beverly. It has been an amazing experience. Being the favorite aunt in the family is quite affirming. Don't underestimate the power of love. You may be pleasantly surprised.

xo,

Beverly  

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Just now, Beverly said:

Being the favorite aunt in the family is quite affirming. Don't underestimate the power of love. You may be pleasantly surprised.

xo,

 Beverly  

Thank you, Beverly.  Your words ring true and are confidence building.  I will share this with my wife.  She needs to hear this as much as I do.  For her at this time, it's easier not to rock the boat but eventually I may have no choice.

 

Susan R?

 

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5 hours ago, Susan R said:

she says, "It's a little different when it hits home...

Yes but as your daughters are either friends or family with other LGBT people, it has hit home already.  Reading this about them I really doubt there will be any concerns over Susan.  

 

As to your nails, when I stopped biting mine years ago I let them grow.  My wife said they're too long but I reminded her that my uncle (a truck driver who owned his own small fleet) always had nicely trimmed nails.  She wasn't used to seeing mine long since I had bit them for so long.  She got over it soon enough.  Just don't go crazy.  What you've showed us is hardly "long."  They look stylish!  Go Susan Go!

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