Need help.

[AsianLondonCD]

I am 37 bi Male crossdresser from West London. I be crossdressing since I was 10 in secret living at home. 

 

My family had no clues until last year in July when my mum went through my stuff and found women clothes and lingerie. My mum did not speak to for week, so I told my sister and she told me that she knew for while. I also told some cousins which accepted it. 

 

Me, sis and mum had chat why I feel like this and she through maybe therapy will help me out but all it did is talk about it. 

 

I know my mum has not accepted me being crossdresser/trans. I tested water by putting panties into wash but never got it back. Also she took my wig which I got myself. Had fight over that I am confused because I do not active feminine, like I do not shave my face that often or let my eyebrow grow or do not wear women clothes outdoors. 

 

I even had fully body wax done, it feel so nice being smooth but it not cheap getting waxing done all the time. 

 

I have bag full of women clothes and lingerie in my closet. At night I wear bra, panties and tank top with my breast foams to bed. Sometimes I feel I should of be born girl and I feel so lost sometimes. 

 

I even got myself women jeans which I like to wear, no one can tell different. 

 

I hope maybe someone can give me some advise. Feel so trapped. 

 

[killjoyaiden]

I'd say imagine yourself 20 years from now. How do you see yourself? What would your dream self look like? Also, try to experiment with names or pronouns to see if this makes you feel less trapped.

 

Stay strong, we're all here for you.

 

Stay safe and stay alive,

Aiden

[Carolyn Marie]

Hello, hon, and welcome to Trans Pulse.  I can imagine how you feel, and I'm sorry to hear that your mother is not being supportive at all.  I take it that you live at home?  That does make things complicated.  There are pamphlets and other information you can download and share with your mom about being transgender, but they may also serve to confuse things more.  Most of the online information concerns trans folk who intend to transition, so she may get the wrong idea if that's not your intention.

 

The most ideal solution would be to find a gender therapist that the two of you go talk to, so you can work things out.  But I know that in the U.K. they are in very short supply and it often takes months to get an appointment, with lots of bureaucracy to fight on the way.  The next best thing is to just sit down with her and have a long talk.  Explain to her that being a cross dresser is not a sin, doesn't hurt you or anyone else, and is just part of who you are.  I hope that you can come to some kind of mutual agreement so you can live your life in peace.

 

Please have a look around the forums and participate in any topics that interest you.  I wish you the best.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie