help and support needed

[wolf055]

hi im 34 and living as a male but I know in my heart I want to be female ive know since I was about 11 that im not happy with my body and sex but had to accept it for family and other issues now I really want to change but don't know what I should do next as im so scared of what might happen if I do decide to fully change any help would be great as I really need help with this

[Carolyn Marie]

Hello, Wolf, and welcome to Trans Pulse.  The journey that you are thinking about starting, and that me and most of us here are on,  can seem very daunting and scary at the start.  It's natural to feel confused and a bit overwhelmed, so you're in good company.

 

What you should "do next" is exactly what you are doing - learning as much as you can.   You can learn more by reading through many of the forums and threads here, and looking online in places like WPATH (Standards of Care), TSRoadmap, PFLAG and many others.

 

The NHS has services for transgender therapy, but the wait can be long.  You'll see many posts from our UK members in the forums, explaining what they went through.  Therapy is very often the first step in the process.

 

The more you participate in the forums, the more you will learn.  We'll be here to help and answer all of your questions.  If you have read the Community Rules, you probably should, just so you know what the guidelines are for posting. 

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

[Cyndee]

Hi Wolf and welcome to Trans Pulse forums. This is a place where you can discuss such things, so relax kick off your heels, you are among friends here. I see you are in the UK, where essentially you can go the private care route, or the public one (NHS). Transition is a big step and any efforts to modify one's body should only be considered with medical and mental health professionals. Transition only if you have to, essentially. Transition is a long road, that involves many steps, there are some incremental steps one can take on their own, such as building a wardrobe, female voice training, having one's ears pierced, to give a few examples. Like my friend Carolyn says the more you participate in the forums, the more you can learn from others experiencing similar things.

 

Hugs

 

Cyndee -

[Susan R]

Hi Wolf, it's nice to meet you.  Glad you found our forum.  You are doing the right thing by reaching out and looking for answers.  I believe there will also be good support for you here.  Look around and I think you'll you'll find many others with these same feelings, desires, and needs as yourself.

You'll find your best support in a good counselor with some specialization in gender identity issues can really make a big difference in your life.  To some degree, the individualized support is even better than the generalized support you can receive online. Although, I have to say that the people I've meet here have also made a huge impact on my overall well being.  I believe you'll find the same.

 

Susan R?

[wolf055]

thank you for all your kind words and help I have my ears pierced and also have my belly button done ive been secretly living as a women in my own home since I was about 17 and now feel I need to make the steps to change thank you again for all your support and its nice to finally meet people who understand what im going through

[Beverly]

Hi wolf055! What you're experiencing is completely normal. Living on the outside as the person we are on the inside is so important for happiness. We're miserable when there's a disconnect there. I can relate. The very first thing I did publicly was have my ears pierced and begin wearing stud earrings. It can be kind of scary at first, but you're going to be great!

[DeeDee]

1 hour ago, wolf055 said:

im so scared of what might happen if I do decide to fully change

Hi Wolf, pleased to meet you.  ? Talking and learning about our fears is one of the ways we can choose to handle them, they can be shrunk down to a manageable size, met head on, or sidestepped and ignored depending on what you find out about them. I have found that even knowing that others have asked themselves the same questions made a huge difference for me. I am sure you will work out which path you need to follow.

[tracy_j]

Hi Wolf,

 

Welcome! It's nice to meet you

 

Here is some published information for you to read, if you are not aware:

 

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/gender-dysphoria/

 

There is other information available too. If you have specific questions please do not hesitate to ask as, even if someone here has not been there, they will likely know how to find out.

 

Tracy

 

 

[Charlize]

Hi Wolf.  Like you i was hiding for years.  I was 63 when i finally came out and went full time instead of hiding my feelings.  As to what to do.......maybe one little step at a time prior to taking what is a difficult jump.  Therapy helped me a great deal as did my time here and time talking to others i met.  Simply knowing i wasn't alone and not "sick" was perhaps the best help.

Glad you've found us.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[MelissaAndProudOfIt]

Hiya all...i havent posted much in ages...then read this thread today...well in my early days when i dressed up only at home, i was convinced i could pass outside..

As a result felt very selfish at keeping myself to myself.  I always wondered what others would think of me....at the time though i was quite confident, i realised that going out dressed, that i was going to have to gain more confidence. I lnew i wasnt perfect and i knew it.  Thoug also i realised neither was anyone else perfect either, as a result i started going out dressed more and since that night i never looked back.

 

Warm regards

 

Melissa

[Jani]

Hello Wolf.  You can move a fast as you need to.  Yes it can be scary but don't worry.  There's good advise written above.  Start slowly and remember to smile.  Despite your fears, coming out of your shell and being real can be fun and exhilarating.  

 

Jani

[wolf055]

thank you all so much ive been to my GP and she as started me on medication and as told me to contact a trans support team that's local to me so im actually going to start the journey to becoming my true self thank you all again for all your kind wods and support hugs

[DeeDee]

Well done on having the courage to take that step Wolf.  

[wolf055]

now I need help again as I asked about my breasts and the GP said they will take time to come in and I my to have them enlarged so I just want some advice is there anywhere to get a pair of false ones till mine come in as at the moment im using some I made with desert rice

[Jani]

If you Google "breast prosthetics" you should be able to find a number of shops in the UK.

 

 

[wolf055]

I found some thank you so much fo your help