Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

help and support needed


wolf055

Recommended Posts

hi im 34 and living as a male but I know in my heart I want to be female ive know since I was about 11 that im not happy with my body and sex but had to accept it for family and other issues now I really want to change but don't know what I should do next as im so scared of what might happen if I do decide to fully change any help would be great as I really need help with this

Link to comment
  • Admin

Hello, Wolf, and welcome to Trans Pulse.  The journey that you are thinking about starting, and that me and most of us here are on,  can seem very daunting and scary at the start.  It's natural to feel confused and a bit overwhelmed, so you're in good company.

 

What you should "do next" is exactly what you are doing - learning as much as you can.   You can learn more by reading through many of the forums and threads here, and looking online in places like WPATH (Standards of Care), TSRoadmap, PFLAG and many others.

 

The NHS has services for transgender therapy, but the wait can be long.  You'll see many posts from our UK members in the forums, explaining what they went through.  Therapy is very often the first step in the process.

 

The more you participate in the forums, the more you will learn.  We'll be here to help and answer all of your questions.  If you have read the Community Rules, you probably should, just so you know what the guidelines are for posting. 

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Wolf and welcome to Trans Pulse forums. This is a place where you can discuss such things, so relax kick off your heels, you are among friends here. I see you are in the UK, where essentially you can go the private care route, or the public one (NHS). Transition is a big step and any efforts to modify one's body should only be considered with medical and mental health professionals. Transition only if you have to, essentially. Transition is a long road, that involves many steps, there are some incremental steps one can take on their own, such as building a wardrobe, female voice training, having one's ears pierced, to give a few examples. Like my friend Carolyn says the more you participate in the forums, the more you can learn from others experiencing similar things.

 

Hugs

 

Cyndee -

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Wolf, it's nice to meet you.  Glad you found our forum.  You are doing the right thing by reaching out and looking for answers.  I believe there will also be good support for you here.  Look around and I think you'll you'll find many others with these same feelings, desires, and needs as yourself.

You'll find your best support in a good counselor with some specialization in gender identity issues can really make a big difference in your life.  To some degree, the individualized support is even better than the generalized support you can receive online. Although, I have to say that the people I've meet here have also made a huge impact on my overall well being.  I believe you'll find the same.

 

Susan R?

Link to comment

thank you for all your kind words and help I have my ears pierced and also have my belly button done ive been secretly living as a women in my own home since I was about 17 and now feel I need to make the steps to change thank you again for all your support and its nice to finally meet people who understand what im going through

Link to comment

Hi wolf055! What you're experiencing is completely normal. Living on the outside as the person we are on the inside is so important for happiness. We're miserable when there's a disconnect there. I can relate. The very first thing I did publicly was have my ears pierced and begin wearing stud earrings. It can be kind of scary at first, but you're going to be great!

Link to comment
1 hour ago, wolf055 said:

im so scared of what might happen if I do decide to fully change

Hi Wolf, pleased to meet you.  ? Talking and learning about our fears is one of the ways we can choose to handle them, they can be shrunk down to a manageable size, met head on, or sidestepped and ignored depending on what you find out about them. I have found that even knowing that others have asked themselves the same questions made a huge difference for me. I am sure you will work out which path you need to follow.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Wolf,

 

Welcome! It's nice to meet you :)

 

Here is some published information for you to read, if you are not aware:

 

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/gender-dysphoria/

 

There is other information available too. If you have specific questions please do not hesitate to ask as, even if someone here has not been there, they will likely know how to find out.

 

Tracy

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Wolf.  Like you i was hiding for years.  I was 63 when i finally came out and went full time instead of hiding my feelings.  As to what to do.......maybe one little step at a time prior to taking what is a difficult jump.  Therapy helped me a great deal as did my time here and time talking to others i met.  Simply knowing i wasn't alone and not "sick" was perhaps the best help.

Glad you've found us.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

Hiya all...i havent posted much in ages...then read this thread today...well in my early days when i dressed up only at home, i was convinced i could pass outside..

As a result felt very selfish at keeping myself to myself.  I always wondered what others would think of me....at the time though i was quite confident, i realised that going out dressed, that i was going to have to gain more confidence. I lnew i wasnt perfect and i knew it.  Thoug also i realised neither was anyone else perfect either, as a result i started going out dressed more and since that night i never looked back.

 

Warm regards

 

Melissa

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hello Wolf.  You can move a fast as you need to.  Yes it can be scary but don't worry.  There's good advise written above.  Start slowly and remember to smile.  Despite your fears, coming out of your shell and being real can be fun and exhilarating.  

 

Jani

Link to comment

thank you all so much ive been to my GP and she as started me on medication and as told me to contact a trans support team that's local to me so im actually going to start the journey to becoming my true self thank you all again for all your kind wods and support hugs

Link to comment

now I need help again as I asked about my breasts and the GP said they will take time to come in and I my to have them enlarged so I just want some advice is there anywhere to get a pair of false ones till mine come in as at the moment im using some I made with desert rice

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

If you Google "breast prosthetics" you should be able to find a number of shops in the UK.

 

 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   7 Members, 0 Anonymous, 151 Guests (See full list)

    • Evelyn J
    • KathyLauren
    • Maddee
    • Breanne_O
    • AllieJ
    • Ashley0616
    • VickySGV
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.5k
    • Total Posts
      767.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      11,941
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Miss Cormac
    Newest Member
    Miss Cormac
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. **Angela Charlotte **
      **Angela Charlotte **
    2. Carlie
      Carlie
      (63 years old)
    3. Cbxshawn
      Cbxshawn
      (49 years old)
    4. HannahO
      HannahO
      (31 years old)
    5. JustKatie
      JustKatie
      (40 years old)
  • Posts

    • Sally Stone
      Go Cleveland Guardians!  I love baseball and I loved playing it when I was younger.  
    • Sally Stone
      My view is we are "dependent" on government, because as a society, we are too lazy to stay actively involved. So, we let politicians do our bidding for us.  I think we'd be in a better place government wise if we policed the actions of our politicians.  We elected them; they work for us.  Sadly, we are allowing them to run amok.  We are where we are because we have chosen to let politicians make all decisions without us.  Remember "by the people, for the people?" That was the intent of our democracy.  Today, however, it is "by the politicians, for the politicians," the people be damned. 
    • Mmindy
      "Play Ball! Batter Up!" is the closing line of the National Anthem as far as I'm concerned. It's the call of the Home Plate Umpire and signals the start of the game. I grew up in the TV and Radio broadcast of the St. Louis Cardinals. Harry Caray, Jack Buck, Tim McCarver, and Mike Shannon, were the voices on my transistor radio. KMOX 1120 AM pushing 50,000 watts of Class A clear-channel non-directional signal. It could be picked up all across MO, IL, IN to the East. KS, OK, CO to the West. IA, MN to the North, and KY, TN, AR to the South. There has always been a rivalry against the Chicago Cubs, in the National League. As for the American League, I have to pull for the Kansas City Royals. I've also been a Little League Umpire, and fan of everything the Little League stands for. Going to Williamsport, PA and seeing the Little League World Series is in my top 10 things to do on my bucket list.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Good evening everyone,   I don't think my mother ever cooked a meal that I didn't like. We also had a kitchen where mom fixed the food, dad filled your plate, and you eat it. It wasn't until our baby brother was born that we could have Pop-Tarts for snacks. Before that all snacks had to meet mom's approval, and in her opinion wouldn't prevent you from eating supper.   Well my day started off on a good note, but has become frustrating because my IT person didn't transfer my saved videos I use for teaching. Then I found out that they didn't save any of my book marks for websites I use frequently.   Best wishes, stay motivated,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • MaeBe
      The number is relative to method of deliver, the time of the dose, and when the blood is drawn. However, I do want to keep away from DVT and other potential issues. I assume I may be getting backed down from my current dose, but my doc told me to stick with the higher dose, so? I also wonder if this has anything to do the my breast growth and mental changes that have been happening over the past few years, like I have some estrogen sensitivity so a little goes a long way or something? I don't have enough data to postulate, but who knows!   With weekly, subcutaneous, shots you expect to see big swings of serum level estradiol from shot to peak to trough. My doctor is interested in mid-week testing (for E and T levels only), which would be post-peak blood serum levels but they will be higher than trough. Most, if not all, resources I've seen online is to measure at trough (which I might do just to do it next time) along with a SHBG, LH, and other metrics.   This is from transfemscience.org for Estradiol valerate in oil, which is very spiky compared to some other estradiol combinations. It's also for intramuscular, which will have a slower uptake and is usually dosed in higher volume due to the slower absorption rate from muscles. They don't have subcutaneous numbers, which I would expect to see similar spikes but higher levels at similar doses due to the relatively higher absorption rate direct from fat.   Are you doing pills, shots, or patches? And when you do get your levels checked are you getting that done when your levels are lowest or some other time?
    • Willow
      Both of my parents were from the “North Shore” of Boston.  My mother Lynn and my father Swampscot.  They had an early 1900s Scots-Irish New England diet.  My sister and I were born in the 40s in Ohio well away from New England seafood and in an area where food was more German and Polish.  My first experience with liver and onions was during basic training.  They ate salt cod but never forced us to eat it same with oysters.  My dad ate oysters but my mother wouldn’t.  Anyone who ever ate an oyster can figure that one out.  I grew up eating lamb.  My wife won’t touch it. I love brazed ox tail, again no way. And the list goes on.  
    • KathyLauren
      My mother was German, so yes, I think it was a cultural thing.  If I'd known you when we were cleaning out my mother's place, I could have sent you her "threat jar". 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Been taking it real easy.Another good neighbor of mine and his 15 year old son came over and cut down a couple dead trees on my property.Knew not to do it taking it easy.I had them put the wood near my fire pit in the back yard.Did it and happy where they put it.They knew I had stents put in and needed to take it easy
    • Ashley0616
      Wow that is a high number for Estradiol good grief! Testosterone levels are better than mine. I don't remember my Estradiol level but testosterone was 80. To me that is really high but it was in the two hundreds the check in before last one. 
    • Ivy
      I don't understand why this would make a difference being a "dad" I mean, as far as how they would grow.
    • Ashley0616
      I don't see why not. I have worn forms since I came out. 
    • MaeBe
      I have never worn breastforms, but I assume as long as they don't aggravate your nipples you could.
    • MaeBe
      Every week I've been excited to take my shot, so it's never been an issue. Yesterday, however, I woke up and started my usual "slow roll" and then suddenly realized I had breakfast plans that I had to rush out the door for. After, it was straight into work calls, and then I got the notification from the doctor about things being too high and all the while my mind had completely slipped that I needed take my shot.   Given that I am not asking for medical advice, but sharing my journey, I will note my results: Estradiol at 447 pg/mL and Testosterone was 23 ng/dL, up and down from 26 pg/mL and 526 ng/dL respectively before treatment. Almost flipped the bit! The doc would like my Estradiol closer to 300 pg/mL, so we'll see what Monday's tests state.   Oh, and I teased the dinner with old soccer teammates and never updated the thread! It went well. There were a couple funny moments. One guy, who I was worried about their response, greeted me with "Hey, you've lost some weight!" 😎 And a friend who lives near me picked me up on the way to dinner exclaimed, after we learned one of the invitees might show up with a date, "Wait! We could have brought women?!" To which I instantly responded, "You kind of did, bringing me!" Everyone got a good laugh out of that. 😁
    • Ashley0616
      To me there isn't that much difference other the measurement, which side the zipper is on and men's pants have bigger pockets. 
    • missyjo
      I hope this is not stupid question..I have yet to start n not sure if doc will approve..but once you start growing buds n such, can you still wear forms to get to the size you were?   I'm a dad, so when I start blossoms they will be smaller for a long time n probably need surgical augmented..that's fine. I don't want to go ddd to aa to ddd..   any ideas?   thank you
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...