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Advice for coming out


Sahara

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Hi so I have identified as non-binary until this weekend(more on that later). I never started correcting pronouns to they them (from he him) I have come out before(and been intentionally outed ) as bisexual so it is not a completely new experience. More about gender now. So I have identified as non binary for most of the year and been out  in my schools QSA. I have not been out to any friends or family for nonbinary. Sunday night I looked in the mirror and saw a girl and that really sparked something or made me realize something about myself. I have not talked to anyone other than my counselor about that. I have never liked being a physical boy but I have never had as much dysphoria as I have now.  I want to come out to my parents at least as genderqueer or questioning. I also want to correct pronouns to they them theirs and I do not want to correct to she her hers because I really have only realized that or something since Sunday. I am worried about switching pronouns (they them theirs) because I do not want to “come out as the wrong thing”. I also sometimes think that the only reason that I “want” to be something other than a boy is because all my friends are girls. So what the -expletive- should I do. So yeah 

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Hi Topher - take a deep breath! Now, I'm pleased to meet you. There is no need to find a label and grab onto it straight away, just try to be comfortable being you and see where it takes you. That goes for telling your parents/friends etc too.  If you want to experiment with pronouns just find one or two close friends that you know will likely be fine and ask them to do so when not in company, if you are still unsure how you identify then don't rush into telling other people unless you feel a need to. The fact that you are speaking to a counsellor is a good thing, honestly the best advice is to read through the threads here because there will definitely be something that connects. :)

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