Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hello Again


mochi90

Recommended Posts

Hi, I created an account here a little over a year ago. At that time, I was living in a supervised living program for the mentally ill when I came out as FtM transgender. Because I was being harassed by my neighbors, I was forced to move to a new city. 

 

Now, I am living on my own for the first time ever. Sadly, I am not in a place in my life where I am able to transition medically, but I live an as out genderqueer and pansexual individual. 

Link to comment

Welcome back! I'd say don't worry about transition, you'll get there if you want to. It's awesome you can be out and be yourself! 

 

❤️

~Toni

Link to comment
  • Admin

Medical transition is great, hon.  But you can still be you without it, at least for now.  Can you cut your hair to something close to a man's style?  Can you wear men's clothes and shoes?   That may not be the same as social transition, but it can go a long way towards making you feel better about yourself.  There are many of us who can't or don't want to medically transition.  We work around it and do the best we can.  Someone close to me doesn't want to do hormones, but she goes out every day as herself and is very happy.

 

Do what is possible, even if that means not doing what is most desirable.  The important thing is to be as happy as you can be, every single day.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Mochi,

 

Welcome back. I'm glad you returned!

 

Lots of love and a big hug,

Timber Wolf ?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Welcome back Mochi.

Glad you are able to express yourself this point.  We never know what life may bring.

Please share here as you wish.  We can help each other as few can.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Mochi, welcome back!

 

Don't despair too much as how you are having to live. If the dysphoria is not too great it can be interesting and, although tricky at times, becomes stable as you are probably finding out.

 

Tracy

Link to comment
On 6/9/2019 at 5:03 PM, mochi90 said:

Hi, I created an account here a little over a year ago. At that time, I was living in a supervised living program for the mentally ill when I came out as FtM transgender. Because I was being harassed by my neighbors, I was forced to move to a new city. 

 

Now, I am living on my own for the first time ever. Sadly, I am not in a place in my life where I am able to transition medically, but I live an as out genderqueer and pansexual individual. 

Hi! Welcome back! 

Your neighbors should have been the ones that had to leave, sorry to hear that you were harassed. 

Congratulations on living alone. That is a big step for anyone. Since you are out, and about, Enjoy living Out freely. I can’t wait until  I can Live and go about Freely. For now I am doing as much as I can inside, and have only come out to one friend. I have been very fortunate being able to be on my HRT Lady Meds and just recently had an Orchie. I hope to gain the courage that you and other have, and Be Out and about. I’m hoping I can muster this courage for Pride this year. 

Until then, I hope the best for you and your journey. Be patient when possible. I know it’s not easy, especially when my real self is screaming to come out. At these moments, I am grateful for where I’m at, and look forward to when I can be my true self. Stay strong! 

 

=Hugs=

Link to comment

Welcome back!  I hope the new city is treating you well!

Link to comment

Thank you to everyone for all the warm welcomes. 

On 6/9/2019 at 11:56 PM, Carolyn Marie said:

Medical transition is great, hon.  But you can still be you without it, at least for now.  Can you cut your hair to something close to a man's style?  Can you wear men's clothes and shoes?   That may not be the same as social transition, but it can go a long way towards making you feel better about yourself.  There are many of us who can't or don't want to medically transition.  We work around it and do the best we can.  Someone close to me doesn't want to do hormones, but she goes out every day as herself and is very happy.

 

Do what is possible, even if that means not doing what is most desirable.  The important thing is to be as happy as you can be, every single day.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Starting next month, I am going to get a men's haircut and select men's glasses. I am also going to try to go shopping on my own and buy some more masculine or gender neutral clothes. 

 

On 6/11/2019 at 9:04 AM, Ellora said:

Hi! Welcome back! 

Your neighbors should have been the ones that had to leave, sorry to hear that you were harassed. 

Congratulations on living alone. That is a big step for anyone. Since you are out, and about, Enjoy living Out freely. I can’t wait until  I can Live and go about Freely. For now I am doing as much as I can inside, and have only come out to one friend. I have been very fortunate being able to be on my HRT Lady Meds and just recently had an Orchie. I hope to gain the courage that you and other have, and Be Out and about. I’m hoping I can muster this courage for Pride this year. 

Until then, I hope the best for you and your journey. Be patient when possible. I know it’s not easy, especially when my real self is screaming to come out. At these moments, I am grateful for where I’m at, and look forward to when I can be my true self. Stay strong! 

 

=Hugs=

Thank you. 

 

I will pray that you will get to this point soon ❤

Link to comment
12 hours ago, mochi90 said:

Thank you to everyone for all the warm welcomes. 

Starting next month, I am going to get a men's haircut and select men's glasses. I am also going to try to go shopping on my own and buy some more masculine or gender neutral clothes. 

 

Thank you. 

 

I will pray that you will get to this point soon ❤

Youre welcome! and Thank you! ?

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 137 Guests (See full list)

    • Mirrabooka
    • Willow
    • KymmieL
    • April Marie
    • Karen Carey
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,015
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Quillian
    Newest Member
    Quillian
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bowie Ellis
      Bowie Ellis
      (19 years old)
    2. Damien Mcknight
      Damien Mcknight
      (18 years old)
    3. JJ
      JJ
      (77 years old)
    4. KathyLauren
      KathyLauren
      (70 years old)
    5. memyselfandwe
      memyselfandwe
      (44 years old)
  • Posts

    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
      When do you know you've had enough surgery?
    • Heather Shay
      Another week completed with more inregration.
    • Heather Shay
      Relief (emotion) Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Relief_(emotion)         Relief is a positive emotion experienced when something unpleasant, painful or distressing has not happened or has come to an end.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • April Marie
      Loving this woman I am becoming.
    • April Marie
      Good morning, everyone!! I was up early again - already on my third cup of coffee having walked/fed the dog and read the local paper.   We have a birthday party for a friend to go to this afternoon but no real plans otherwise.   I hope to be able to attend tonight's TGP Zoom session. It's been weeks since I've been able to participate with the illness/loss of our dog, two horrible colds in succession and our trip to chase the solar eclipse.   Have a wonderful day and look for the goodness in it.
    • April Marie
      I think we tend to be overly critical of our looks, whether we're trying to express ourselves as masculine, feminine or anywhere along the gender spectrum. For me, I use photos as a way to track my progress, to help me find my style and look and to help me find ways to improve myself in posture, looks, make-up, style......   I didn't really think about our FB avatar being public but then realized that when people search they do see it.   Since I'm not out to anyone but my wife, therapist, priest and people here, my FB page remains "that guy." I have created a Bitmoji that is relatively androgynous moving slowly towards the feminine. Long gray hair, earrings, softer features...I'm transitioning it along with myself. :-)
    • April Marie
      I so very much enjoy your posts. This one, though, hit home with me for many reasons. I was commissioned in the Army in '77, as well. Like you, I was not overly masculine in the way that many of our contemporaries were. I (still do) cried at weddings, pictures of puppies and babies, when I talked about bring proud of what my units accomplished and was never the Type A leader. In the end, it worked for me and I had a successful career.   This is, of course, your story not mine so I won't detail my struggle. It just took me much longer to understand what the underlying cause of my feelings was and even more to admit it. To act on it.    Thank you for sharing your story, Sally.
    • Sally Stone
      Post 6 “The Military Career Years” In 1977 I joined the Army and went to flight school to become a helicopter pilot.  To fly for the military had been a childhood dream and when the opportunity arose, I took advantage of it, despite knowing I would have to carefully control my crossdressing activity.  At the time, military aviation was male dominated and a haven for Type A personalities and excessive testosterone.  I had always been competitive but my personality was not typically Type A.  And while I could never be considered effeminate, I wasn’t overtly masculine either.  Consequently, I had little trouble hiding the part of my personality that leaned towards the feminine side.    However, serving in the Army limited my opportunities for feminine self-expression.  During this period, I learned that being unable to express my feminine nature regularly, led to frustration and unhappiness.  I managed these feelings by crossdressing and underdressing whenever I could.  Underdressing has never been very fulfilling for me, but while I was in the Army it was a coping mechanism.  I only cross-dressed in private and occasionally my wife would take me out for a late-night drive.  Those drives were still quite private, but being out of the house was clearly therapeutic.    I told myself I was coping, but when it became apparent the Army was going to be a career, the occasional and closeted feminine expression was clearly inadequate.  I needed more girl time and I wanted to share my feminine side with the rest of the world, so the frustration and unhappiness grew.  Despite my feelings regarding feminine self-expression, I loved flying, so I wasn’t willing to give up my military career.  Consequently, I resigned myself to the fact that the female half of my personality needed to take a back seat, and what helped me through, was dreaming of military retirement, and finally having the ability to let Sally blossom.   About Sally. Ironically, she was born while I was still serving.  It was Halloween and my wife and I were hosting a unit party.  I looked upon the occasion as the perfect excuse to dress like a girl.  After a little trepidation, my wife agreed I should take advantage of the opportunity.  Back then, my transformations were not very good, but with my wife’s help, my Halloween costume looked quite authentic.  Originally, my wife suggested that my presentation should be caricature to prevent anyone from seeing through my costume.  But that didn’t appeal to me at all.  I wanted to look as feminine and ladylike as I could.   To my wife’s and my amazement, my costume was the hit of the party.  In fact, later in the evening, my unit buddies decided they wanted to take me out drinking and before either me or my wife could protest, I was whisked away and taken to one of our favorite watering holes.  Terrified at first, I had an amazing time, we all did.  But on Monday morning, when I came to work, I learned that I had a new nickname; it was Sally, and for the duration of that tour, that’s what I was called.  Well, when it came time for me to choose a feminine name, there weren’t any other choices.  Sally it was, and to this day I adore the name, and thank my pilot buddies for choosing it.   And this brings me to my last assignment before retiring.  I was teaching military science in an Army ROTC program at Mercer University in Macon, Georgia.  I had been a member of TRIESS (a nationwide crossdressing support group).  I wasn’t really an active participant but when we moved to Georgia, I learned there was a local chapter in Atlanta.  I reached out to the membership chair person, and joined.   Because the chapter meetings took place in Atlanta, a trans friendly city, and because Atlanta was so far from Macon and any of my military connections, I felt it would be safe to let my feminine hair down.  The monthly meetings took place in the Westin Hotel and Conference Center in Buckhead, an upscale northern Atlanta suburb, and the hotel itself was 4-star.  The meetings were weekend affairs with lots of great activities that allowed me to express myself in a public setting for the first time.  It was during this time, that Sally began to blossom.   I have the fondest memories of Sigma Epsilon (the name of our chapter in Atlanta).  Because the hotel was also a conference center, there was always some big event, and in many cases, there were several.  One weekend there was a nail technician conference that culminated in a contest on Saturday evening.  When the organizers learned there was a huge group of crossdressers staying at the hotel, they reached out to us looking for manicure volunteers.  I volunteered and got a beautiful set of long red fingernails that I wore for the duration of the weekend.   During another of our meeting weekends, there was a huge military wedding taking place, and imagine what we were all thinking when we learned it was a Marine wedding.  Our entire group was on edge worrying we might have to keep a low profile.  It turned out to be one of the most memorable weekends I would experience there.  First off, the Marines were all perfect gentlemen.  On Friday night and throughout the day on Saturday before the wedding, we rubbed elbows with most of them and their wives in and around the hotel, and at the hotel bar.  In fact, we got along so well the bride invited us to the reception.  Somewhere, there is a picture of me with a handsomely dressed Marine draped on each of my arms, standing in the lobby of the hotel.  Sadly, I never got a copy of it because the woman who took the picture used a film camera (yes, they actually took picture that way in ancient times).    My two-years with Sigma Epsilon was the perfect transition.  I went from being fully closeted to being mostly out.  I enhanced my feminine presentation and significantly reduced my social anxiety.  It also signified the end of one life and the beginning of another.  I had a great career and never regretted serving, but I was ready to shed the restrictions 20-years of Army service had imposed on my feminine self-expression.  My new life, Sally’s life, was about to begin, and with it I would begin to fully spread a new set of wings, this time feminine wings.    Hugs, Sally
    • Sally Stone
      Ashley, for a very long time she clung to the term crossdresser, because for her it was less threatening.  Over the years, though, she has come to recognize and acknowledge that I have a strong feminine side.  And like me, she now has a much better understanding of where my transgender journey is going, so me being bigender, isn't the threat she might have perceived it as, years ago. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://apnews.com/article/title-ix-sexual-assault-transgender-sports-d0fc0ab7515de02b8e4403d0481dc1e7   The revised regulations don't touch on trans athletes; which I totally understand, as that's become a third rail issue and this is an election year.  But the other changes seem pretty sensible, and will obviously result in immediate right wing lawsuits.   Carolyn Marie
    • missyjo
      darling you have wonderful taste..I especially love the red dress n sneaker outfit   enjoy   missy
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...