I will miss the little things

[DawnD]

So last weekend I went camping(tents, drinking, bonfire, no restrooms) I was in boy mode as I am not out yet. When natured called as is the case with mass quantities of cheap beer is involved, I found a tree, pulled it out, shook it off after, put it away and went back to fun. It got me thinking if or when I transition to a girl, it will require a little more privacy and toilet paper.(I have camped with girls) I have what I have between my legs, but male parts are so much more convenient in that regard. 

 

It got my thinking what little thing will you miss or do you miss after transitioning? (Let's keep this on the light side, we are all aware of how society can treat us, just little things)

 

Dawn

[Kris-Boston]

Less expensive hair cuts vs the salon . 

[DawnD]

Just now, Kris-Boston said:

Less expensive hair cuts vs the salon . 

Hmmm.... Yea I guess you can't beat buzzing up your own hair with a pair of $30 Wal-Mart clippers

[Susan R]

 

2 hours ago, DawnD said:

It got me thinking if or when I transition to a girl, it will require a little more privacy and toilet paper

 

1 hour ago, Kris-Boston said:

Less expensive hair cuts vs the salon . 

 

Great topic, Dawn.  I miss both of the things listed above.  I really miss being able to carry heavy things like I once could.  My upper body strength has dwindled.  When moving things like couches, sheets of plywood, etc...I never realized how much of the lifting required me to use my chest to help balance these bulky items.  I can't have ANYTHING touch me anywhere near my chest.  It nearly sends me into orbit when I inadvertently hit my nipples.

[Kirsten]

I have yet to find anything I really miss other than the looks from cute girls. Girls are definitely not checking me out anymore. Well maybe except a lesbian but I haven’t noticed that either. 

And what’s worse is that that’s been replaced with guys checking me out and flirting. It’s really really weird still for me. Like really weird. lol. 

[Ellora]

I do not miss anything (yet), and I dont believe i will. I am doing what I have always wanted to do, so everything that comes with it will be gravy. I get looks, and I enjoy them. I havent been flirted with yet, at least not as far as I know. That might come later when I present more. 

[Kirsten]

11 hours ago, Ellora said:

I havent been flirted with yet, at least not as far as I know. That might come later when I present more. 

 

Oh you’ll know. Guys are a lot of things, but sneaky isn’t one of them. The other night at the concert I went to this kid (I’d say 25ish) came walking up to my wife and I, full of confidence and ready to go. He used my ink as an ice breaker and had like 3 more flirty lines ready to go. I was a deer in headlights though. And my wife just laughed at me. He was a cute guy too. I’m still amazed it happened. 

Oh and earlier in the night when we first arrived her and I jumped out of my truck to go find a porta potty and this group of guys parked near us were talking about my truck. As we walked away we heard this guy say “that girl drives this truck!?” We both laughed and on the way back he walked right over and introduced himself. I think he clocked me though. Cause his demeanor switched up after a few sentences. 

 

But trust me Ellora, it’ll happen. And you’ll know it when it is. 

[Charlize]

Early in transition i felt i might loose a lot but actually what i've found is greater freedom to do what i like.  I certainly don't miss peeing in a line with other guys!

As far as pretty girls,   i find myself able to smile talk and relate as never before. Guys can be more difficult but that's kind of validating.

I must admit that if we lived 75 years ago when a woman's world was so limited transition might have been difficult.  Today i'm just glad to be me and following gender "rules" is not dependent on society's norms.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Ellora]

2 hours ago, Charlize said:

 I certainly don't miss peeing in a line with other guys!

Ha! This made me laugh and cringe at the same time! I hated going to the “Murph” (Short for Jack Murphy Stadium, Originally as I’ve know and preferred as “The San Diego Stadium”) because they had those gawd awful pee troughs! I would wait In line for a stall if I could, especially cause I felt I should be sitting down anyway...

[Ellora]

2 hours ago, Charlize said:

Today i'm just glad to be me and following gender "rules" is not dependent on society's norms.

This ^^^

[Jani]

Just now, Ellora said:

because they had those gawd awful pee troughs!

They had those at the race track I used to frequent!  Argh! 

[Ellora]

3 hours ago, Kirsten said:

Guys are a lot of things, but sneaky isn’t one of them

? So true, when I used to hang out at a local coffee house in Hillcrest, I used to get flirted with all the time. But that was over ten years ago and I was very much male to them, no obvious signs of my Lady self that might be noticed now. I haven’t been to any of the coffee places around here in a bit, but it would be interesting to see how that plays out. I do notice guys looking at me, but I haven’t been approached yet. Unless I’m just being oblivious, ?. After being freed to be a trans woman, telling my drs and starting HRT, I have stopped thinking as a male more and more everyday, so seeing things solely as a woman, I miss some of the markers I might have seen before. I do not miss that, and try to limit seeing “as a male” cause yuk, ? 

3 hours ago, Kirsten said:

I was a deer in headlights though. 

That’s so funny! I totally know what you mean.

In my case, I’m not attracted to males, I don’t watch men like I do women, unless they approach me. If they are cute, or have a good personality, I start to get giddy ? and can freeze. 

[Ellora]

Just now, Jani said:

They had those at the race track I used to frequent!  Argh! 

Argh!! 

I went to La Jolla Shores the other day, been a while, and they remodeled the bathroom/showers. In the “old days,” there was a row of urinals and toilets (most of the doors to the toilets were missing. Across from that there was shower area, no stalls, no privacy. This was all in the men’s area, not counting the outside shower area. Anyhoo, if you had to use the toilet, you had a view of men peeing and taking a naked shower, and visa vera, they could all see you sitting there... double and triple ugh. Great for an exhibitionist, but not for a shy young lady. ?

[tracy_j]

I am not sure it is all post transition. I remember a friend joking at a party we were at that I was typically like a woman and taking so long in the loo. On reading a national newspaper here today I did notice an article about there being loads more bacteria in a mens facillity than a womens - surprise surprise lol. The main thing I miss about going in the wild (apart from beware of nettles etc) is that it is less easy to see approaching embarrasment, being low down in the undergrowth.

 

My visits to the hairdresser are very similar pricewise. She is not upmarket either is styles or price but I love the local meeting / gossip. I suppose the thing I don't miss is the (often) doctors surgery atmosphere of a barbers rather than chatty hairdressers.

 

Tracy

[Ellora]

Just now, tracy_j said:

beware of nettles

Eeeek, Nettle in the nethers! No bueno!  

One thing men and women have in common, is they both have need to squat then #2 is involved. 

[Susan R]

I was reading one of my favorite member's (DeeDee) excellent blog today and she reminded me of probably one of the hardest "little things" I am missing directly related to my transition.

 

I miss my grandkids calling me "Papa (my dead name)".  I especially miss my three girls calling me Dad.  It took me years to gain their love and trust as their long time step-dad and suddenly it's gone.  The grandkids have 'sometimes' (when they remember) call me "Grammy" now but my 3 daughters have reverted to calling me "Susan".  Even though it's my personal name, it's doesn't feel personal at all when they use it.  Strange but true for me.  Everyone calls me Susan too so there's no personal connection reflected in using just my first name.

 

If any of you have thought of something besides mom, mother or mum, let me know.  I don't like those because if feels to close to what they call my wife...their mom.  When introduced to new people my girls say, "these are my parents" instead of "this is my mom and my dad".  When talking to the grandkids and referring to me, they call me "Grammy".  The problem is when I am with them, they call their mom..."mom" and they call me..."Susan"

i guess that'll have to do unless someone knows another nickname that can be used.

 

Susan R?

[Cautiousness]

Although I have had several bad-dreams or nightmares relating to "anatomical regeneration" in which I struggle to obtain a second gender surgery, I must confess that there are times when I do miss "the convenience of it all" (i.e, when nature calls while hunting or out in the fishing barge).

[Ellora]

Just now, Susan R said:

I especially miss my three girls calling me Dad.

Everything else about me wants me to complete my Journey, except the one thing my Kids call me, "Dad." Unless they choose to call me another name, I will never personally ask them to call me something else. My Ex would freak if I asked them to call me Mom, and I would prefer her to stay out of my life as much as possible. My other kids, from a friend, chose to call me daddy all of their own. Their Mom is a long time friend, and I have been present in their lives since birth. We never asked them to call me daddy. If they did want to call me Mom or anything close to that, it would have to be approved by my friend, cause she , as a single Mom, deserves that.

I feel for you, it has to be hard not hearing those word, I know I would miss it. I hope that you may find peace and happiness with this dilemma. 

[Ellora]

Just now, MaryMary said:

Waking up from the surgery and feeling immediately like it's normal

YES!!! THIS!!!^^^

[Lexi C]

Quote

So

so far the only thing I hate or that  effect;s me is that I have to wear a wig..I guess once I am done with FFS I am hoping they can do something with my hair line as well. I hardly ever use the men rooms anymore even in the gym.. Susan did bring up a interesting point about strength..I noticed my upper body strength is getting weak..But when you add it all up..much happier as woman then I was ever as a man 

[ToniTone]

Yeah, I miss not having to spend like an hour just to put my face on in the morning. Having to wake up like an hour earlier to get ready. But it is kinda fun too.

 

Well, off to the races!

 

~Toni

[Kirsten]

That shortens up pretty fast Toni. I used to be an hour in the bathroom for a regular day. Now it’s 25 and that includes shaving shower makeup and hair. It’s still a good hour for a fancy date or something like that. 

@Susan R we use Didi. But as time passes I find it’s much easier for our youngest to just call me mom. It happens more and more and so much less confusing for him. It’s his choice to call me whatever he wants. I do try to ask the kids to use mom for me outside of the house with strangers though. It create less questions and issues. It sucks having to out yourself regularly to strangers. 

I originally said I couldn’t think of anything I missed, but there is something. Having the ability to just bury my emotions at any time with no issue. I could squash anything at one point. Fold it up and kick it away. But now it’s literally emotional vomit constantly. Up down back and forth annoyed and angry and happy all at the same time. So many freaking emotions all crashing into each other. It’s draining. So that’s what I miss most. By far. Lol