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What Makes Non-Binary A Good Fit For You?


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I know a lot of mtf want to jump in and have an orch as soon as but im all for u been on testosterone suppression for some time..i found that even after my first suppression meds it took a fair while for things to settle. Then comes the period to see how u like life without testosterone ..for me it wasa bit of a double edged sword.loosing the test was like a relief, a feeling of that feels better but also a feeling of so now I want more lol..now ive got to the stage of life is lived without test and has for some time..id like an orch just to tidy things up and remove an injection need. id stop the med but the doc wont guarantee that the testicles wont jump back into life.ive long passed the must have now stage and now its more like must get that done when ive got a minute lol..

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On 10/10/2019 at 3:01 PM, Jackie C. said:

Ah, to live in the UK

I think ah to live in the states lol..the uk is going down the sewer with this Brexit thing..we do have state gender clinics but they are now so over subscribed they only take a limited number of patients every year so waiting lists are now 2/3/4 years just for a first appointment at which they say hi,take ur blood pressure and give u another appointment usually 6 months plus away...we have private gender clinics but boy they are expensive and mostly in London for the rich set...and yes mc donalds seem smaller here lol..

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one thing ive been curious about is with the test blocker my sex drive diminished, hasnt gone completely like they all said it would.when u started with estrogen did u get e return of sex drive??

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  • Forum Moderator

OK, how about "Ah, to live in a country that isn't crazy?" I'm pretty sure the US is racing the UK to the bottom right now. It'll be close. The UK is in a better place overall, but the US has a larger, more robust system. I'm seriously considering claiming asylum somewhere if Trump gets a second term.

 

I never really lost my sex drive. It's just different now. How to describe it. I'm more interested in cuddling to start. Oh, that's a good analogy: It's like your car in the winter. It doesn't start as quick, but it gets there with a little coaxing. I find an hour or so of foreplay with my spouse... kissing, cuddling, petting, etc... really gets me ready to go. Afterwards, there's more afterglow and cuddling. It's not urgent. It's more like a gentle float down a lazy river on a clear summer day. You get there, but it's more about the ride. That's not quite right. It's more intense than that, but not nearly the drive to, "Rar! Must cross line!" like I had on male hormones. Oh there we go, more like a really good massage. More of my body gets involved and its like a whole body, "Oh, my." Like I said, satisfying, but longer and less intense.

 

I probably didn't explain that very well. I keep running into that. English needs better words for girl stuff.

 

Hugs!

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i get the drift as it were witht he sex drive..i only asked as I have a mildish one now and wondered if I did go on low dose estrogen if it would kill it or keep it....

 where I live in the uk is rural and away from the cities. My village is a bit old fashioned and a bit behind the times, I joke one day we will get that new fangled electricity stuff...….places like London have become hell holes I couldn't live there it seems violence is growing daily with knife crime ect..I have often said our prisons are too soft as does a larger part of the population but they are so understaffed they have no choice but to let inmates virtualy run the places ..a lot of our prisons are no privately run and just cant get staff to stay and the ones they do get don't last long as surprise  surprise theres nasty convicts in there and they say nasty words to them lol.sorry on my soap box again

I went to new York a few times and loved the place and the surrounding state such a variety of cultures. bet its changed sine then..

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  • Forum Moderator

Oh I don't know. We have private prisons and they're expensive and understaffed. Tragically they don't focus on rehabilitation which I think would help (It's been proven to help in other countries that have tried it). From the US (My little space is near Detroit), knife crime seems quaint. There was a pair of women while I was getting my name changed* who were talking about a shootout that had kept them awake a few nights before. Somebody with a pistol and somebody with a shotgun from the sound of it apparently.

Big cultural difference there yeah? We're not the Wild West but...

 

Hugs!

 

*My county seat is in downtown Detroit.

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Back to sex drive on estrogen, yes it rather kills the physical side of libido, but the mind and heart side of libido is still quite present coupled with what becomes a new element which is the flood of emotion that is never present in those born male. Like Jackie says, it takes time to get the motor purring and the cuddling and caressing makes it all a delight.

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good to know...I obviously don't need the male reaction to arousal its redundant,it was more the still wanting a person romantically..after all the years tucking any reaction down there ruins the look lol lol

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  • 1 month later...

Hi! I jumped into this thread with some trepidation - only to find this light-hearted and refreshing. My therapist suggested I consider my presentation as gender non-conforming since although I'm eagerly looking forward to HRT, even with my body softened I will be 250 pounds of linebacker looking 69 year old.

So my decision is made easier knowing that several of you dress similarly to how I do (t-shirts or sweatshirts with jeans or leggings) already. I do not know just yet whether I will go as far as orchi-surgery, although I believe I will. Has anyone experienced any negative results on that? I know NB Adult has alluded to something along those lines.

I'm just curious if there's some hidden pitfall to getting these blasted things out of the way!

PS. Thanks for kindly accepting me. I've been feeling very alone lately.

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2 hours ago, TammyAnne said:

do not know just yet whether I will go as far as orchi-surgery, although I believe I will. Has anyone experienced any negative results on that? I know NB Adult has alluded to something along those lines.

I'm just curious if there's some hidden pitfall to getting these blasted things out of the way!

PS. Thanks for kindly accepting me. I've been feeling very alone lately.

Piece of cake, took around 45 minutes which includes the waiting time for two different locals to take effect. Actual operating time was probably less than 20 minutes. Single slice in the center of the scrotum with a laser knife while the adorable little nurse held my penis out of the way, surgeon brought both out the same small slit and closed it with a couple of dissolving stitches. I asked him when he was starting, he said the left one was out, he was going after the other one. I crunched up on my elbows and said, "Bye fellas!" He asked me why I said that and I told him, "It was the former hard drive for a lot of bad male behavior!" The nurse chuckled. I bought several large bags of frozen peas to put on my crotch as my friend drove me home.

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2 hours ago, NB Adult said:

Piece of cake, took around 45 minutes which includes the waiting time for two different locals to take effect. Actual operating time was probably less than 20 minutes. Single slice in the center of the scrotum with a laser knife while the adorable little nurse held my penis out of the way, surgeon brought both out the same small slit and closed it with a couple of dissolving stitches. I asked him when he was starting, he said the left one was out, he was going after the other one. I crunched up on my elbows and said, "Bye fellas!" He asked me why I said that and I told him, "It was the former hard drive for a lot of bad male behavior!" The nurse chuckled. I bought several large bags of frozen peas to put on my crotch as my friend drove me home.

I can identify with seeing the surgery as a solution to multiple problems. You've alluded to regretting decision though. If I'm not being too personal, was it further surgery (GRS) or the Orchi? I'm not leaning towards further surgery, perhaps not even the Orchi. But certainly want to suppress my testosterone.

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13 hours ago, TammyAnne said:

I can identify with seeing the surgery as a solution to multiple problems. You've alluded to regretting decision though. If I'm not being too personal, was it further surgery (GRS) or the Orchi? I'm not leaning towards further surgery, perhaps not even the Orchi. But certainly want to suppress my testosterone.

 

I don't regret the orchiectomy but did decide to opt out of GRS at the last minute as I realized that further MtF transitioning (for me) would be a huge waste of money, time and effort, would add nothing positive to my quality of life and only serve to destroy my relationship with my spouse forever. Since my life isn't all just about me I opted out and Marcie Bowers refunded half my consult fee which was gracious of her. 

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On 11/15/2019 at 8:18 AM, NB Adult said:

 

I don't regret the orchiectomy but did decide to opt out of GRS at the last minute as I realized that further MtF transitioning (for me) would be a huge waste of money, time and effort, would add nothing positive to my quality of life and only serve to destroy my relationship with my spouse forever. Since my life isn't all just about me I opted out and Marcie Bowers refunded half my consult fee which was gracious of her. 

Ah. Super, that was the answer I hoped to hear! Thank you!

I was afraid there was some hidden pitfall that I'd missed. I think we're on the "same page" and apparently the same path. So hello up there way ahead of me!

I can't imagine not wanting to be rid of these things.

But trying to pass as a woman appears to be a bridge too far. So I'll go as far as I'm comfortable and make the best of it.

If only I'd not waited until nearly 70 to figure all this out!

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      The tornado called Taylor ripped through Bob's apartment. After a trip to a laundromat, two trips to grocery stores for cleaning supplies and what Taylor opined were Basic Staples, everything was scrubbed within an inch of its life.  A new dish  drainer with a new hand towel and dish cloth were by the side of the scrubbed out sink; motorcycle parts were in a box under the newly made bed.  Floor, shower, toilet, sink had been hit in the bathroom and new towels hung there the way Taylor liked them. "I don't recognize the place/" "So move out." Taylor was sitting on one of the new kitchen chairs.  There were four of them around the little wooden table.  In the middle was a flower arrangement.  Bob had made his last trip to the dumpster.  Not a pizza box remained. A row of card board boxes with books had been replaced by shelves full of neatly arranged books. "Look at this." "I am not going to do this all the time.  You clean your own place from now on. I am bushed." 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The class moved into sparring, breaking into twos and practicing moves against each other.  Bob was moving among the pairs, adjusting positions of hands, hips, feet.  Taylor was unsure about someone touching her like that, her hips particularly.    The green belt class ended as new students came in for the beginners' class. Down at the other end the brown belt class began.  The room was large enough you could do two classes at the same time.   The other beginners, nervous, lined up at Margie's table.  People got into gis, the men in their big area and only woman in the little restroom that was for them.   Sensei Mark greeted them and showed them where to stand: on the little x's on the floor. He explained the School Code.  They would recite it at the beginning of class and they needed to memorize it for the white belt test, at which time they would, of course, receive a white belt. 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"Judy, would you get her things?" "I did nothing," Judy said, and moved towards the restroom, stunned.  "Nothing." "I know what she was wearing," Margie said, and got them. "I've got a gym bag. It 's red and it says Roosters on it. Can you get it? Mark got it.  He accompanied them to the car.  Taylor was non-stop crying deeply, clinging to him for dear life. Mark unlocked the car and together they managed to pry Taylor off of him, even though it took both of them to do it.  She was in the car seat and they managed to buckle her in it. "I am going to take you to your apartment," he said. "No. Emergency room," she said. "Maybe the psych ward."  He didn't doubt it. She calmed down in a few minutes on the way. "Well, that was embarrassing." "Everyone remembers their first day of karate class." "Bob, what I love about you is your sense of humor." "I love everything about you." "Even this?" "Yes. Even this." She managed to walk into the ER.  They were both still in gis. "Karate accident?" "No. I am Taylor and I am a nut. I wear a gi all the time. I make my boyfriend wear one, too." "She had a triggered event.  She's had some difficult times." "I see. Do you you know are bleeding?" "No."  Her crotch was wet with blood and the blood was seeping down both legs. She was wheeled away. "Sir, please wait here." He did.  He had no legal right to see her right now. After a while a nurse came out and said he could come on  back. There she was in a hospital gown.  "Seems like old times." "yeah.  We gotta stop meeting like this." The nurse buzzed around and left them. "They are running tests." "I bet they are." "I got an MRI. On a Saturday morning, too."  First ever. "You rate.  But why?" "They figure some of the old scar tissue - you know, from the- from the past - ripped open and they need to see what is going on." "We know what is going on,"said a doctor, stepping in. He looked at her. "I am Doctor Michaels.  They called me in.  I just happened to be in the building and they wanted me to see this and take the case.  My specialty is Disorders of Sexual Development. But what I am seeing is little in the way of disorder.  Look at this." They looked at the image. "This is a perfectly ordinary uterus." "Uterus?" "Yes, your uterus." "What?" "That is not all.  This is a cervix, and this is a vagina." "It's blocked up." "Yes.  It looks like you had surgery to do exactly that when you were an infant.  They used to do that." "This is me?" "You." "Really?" "I imagine this takes some getting used to. "Can it be undone?" "Absolutely. I mean, I cannot guarantee it, but it is more than likely. I would like to run some tests." "And the bleeding?" "It looks like the hormones you have been taking have kicked of a regular monthly cycle. Then you did a whole bunch of exercise.  Not surprising." "What?" "I want you to come to my office next week for follow-up.  Have you ever had a genetic test of any sort?" "No." "Well, your testes - one looks at first glance more like an ovary." "Ovary. Can I have kids?" "Too soon to tell.  You look happy." She did.  "Bob, you look stunned." "I am." "Given what happened earlier today we want to keep you overnight for observation.  I understand you are a trauma victim and something triggered it." "I got a punch thrown at me in kara-tay class, is all. I am a wimp." "Well, I will let you two talk for a minute and they will come and get you shortly.  No bad news here." "They are coming to take me away, hah-hah, they are coming to take me away," Taylor chanted. "Bob, I am not done with kara-tay.  I want to at least finish a first class. I mean, you paid for it and I want you to get your money's worth." "I think I got that." "Kiss me, you fool,"  she said, and he did, with energy.        
    • April Marie
      These arrived in yesterday's mail. I'm out working in the yard today so just old clothes. I'm looking forward to wearing this t-shirt dress when the weather warms up a bit more.  
    • missyjo
      Ashley I've known busty girls who wore b nice bras tl work n such then like a sift sports bra to lounge or sleep in hugs
    • missyjo
      your nails b hair came wonderful  congratulations  enjoy
    • Willow
      The one thing about this position, if you want more hours just wait and be flexible.  I’m now working until 7:30 pm instead of 4:30.  
    • Ashley0616
      I hope your head cold goes away soon! Sorry you have to cut grass with that.   Love the new t-shirt   I love that one.    What Jeep would you want to get? That is awesome about your wife getting better!
    • Ashley0616
      Welcome Mattie! I would recommend the first step is finding a gender therapist and see if you are or aren't. Then one of the biggest steps if you are do you want to start hormone replacement therapy. The decision should be thought long and hard. There are irreversible effects. Looking forward to your next post! Take care!
    • Ashley0616
      Congratulations on being able to pick up a cancellation! I hope to hear more updates about your transition. 
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