Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

ShawnaLeigh

I want to be prepared...

Recommended Posts

ShawnaLeigh

This will be my first visit to a therapist.  Any therapist no less a gender therapist!  Next Friday.  I go to talk to a stranger about all my issues.  All my fears. I feel like I have no idea what to expect.  What to say.  What to ask.  
Im not trying to talk myself out of it.  I’m going for sure but I am already nervous...
 

Share this post


Link to post
Jani

The initial appointment will be formalities.  But then you can get down to business of what you hope to attain.  Don;t be afraid to be honest.  That way you get the benefit you wish.

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Jackie C.

Congratulations!

 

Your therapist won't be a stranger for long. No worries. For me the initial appointment was mostly about outlining why I was coming to see my therapist. The gender therapist was similar. We talked about me, she asked questions, I answered them. It's a safe space. You can say whatever you like in full confidentiality.

 

So yeah, what Jani said. Be honest. There's no judgement. Not being honest only hurts you. Talk about what's on your mind. She'll ... I'm assuming here, all my therapists have been women but that's my preference ... ask insightful, leading questions to help you open up. The atmosphere will be relaxing and maybe a little dimly lit ... that's preference of the therapist, one of my gender therapists had an interview room that looked like your grandmother's sitting room, it was lovely.

 

In any case, relax and enjoy the experience. The more you share, the more your therapist gets to know you and the more she can help. You'll be fine.

 

Hugs!

Share this post


Link to post
ShawnaLeigh

It’s kind of how I envisioned it to be.  But still nervous all the same.  
I’m not “out”.  I’m not sure what I feel or what I am inside.  On the outside I’m still all “guy”.  Which I know is not terrible but not me.  
I hope I get some answers even if they are not what I wanted to hear.  
Thank you ladies.  You both have been very helpful to me and I appreciate it more then you know❤️

Share this post


Link to post
Jani
5 hours ago, Nivegnal said:

But still nervous all the same.

I was terribly nervous going in and walking on air on the way out as I had finally unburdened my soul to someone. This will hopefully be a good thing for your too. 

 

Jani

Share this post


Link to post
ShawnaLeigh
1 hour ago, Jani said:

I was terribly nervous going in and walking on air on the way out as I had finally unburdened my soul to someone. This will hopefully be a good thing for your too. 

 

Jani

I am hoping to feel “the weight” lifted.  
It is nice to know there are those here that understand.  

Share this post


Link to post
NB Adult

Back in the early 1990's I was fortunate being in a VA related counseling program for PTSD issues. My counselor was in a long term lesbian relationship, so when I broached the subject of what I intended to accomplish as a trans person, she had no qualms about writing me all the necessary letters. Prior to that I had been seeing Dr. Anne Lawrence, I know some people detest her, but she saw fit to put me on feminizing HRT and she also wrote me a letter of recommendation for SRS. Later it turned out that the endocrine specialist at the local VA hospital knew Anne, and he bought into my plan to transition and set me up for free meds. He also wrote me a letter recommending an orchiectomy and or SRS as I had complained about having to take Spironolactone as a testosterone blocker. So when I hooked up with Dr. Bowers I had both feet in the door but in the finale analysis decided that it wasn't the ultimate panacea for me. The reason I blathered all this past history out is that I felt at the time that if anything that you desire to accomplish is really valid and that important to you, then you will be manipulative and as devious as necessary to achieve what you need to. I am a bit embarrassed by putting all this out there, because in the end I dropped the ball entirely and in retrospect I have to concede that we should take our time going through the process step by step and not try to circumvent the system. It is what it is for our own good.

Share this post


Link to post
ShawnaLeigh

I ponder what I would really do if it all was just handed to me tomorrow.  Would I jump in both feet or not.  It’s easy to say you want this or that and different when you can actually get it.  I know this well enough.  
I’m not in a hurry to have more surgery.  SRS is not on my scope but seems like a possible step.   Like you I’m more interested in an orchy and shed my T.   But I’m still healing from my last tangle with a scalpel.   
Before I go on with that I want to understand my feelings and place in all this.  I’m hoping the therapist can show/teach/explain what’s what and why.  

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 111 Guests (See full list)

    • ROGOFOS
    • Adrian Doyle
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      69,282
    • Total Posts
      625,780
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      5,845
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Karma
    Newest Member
    Karma
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. ironemerson77
      ironemerson77
  • Posts

    • ShawnaLeigh
      Welcome.  Great place you found.  I love it here. ❤️
    • Susan R
      Aiden,  I agree with the others posting here.  You have some serious talent.  Keep doing what you enjoy.  These quick doodles may pay back dividends down the road.   Thank you for sharing, Susan🌷
    • Aidan5
      Thanks man!
    • ToniTone
      That's so sweet! Girl on girl compliments are the best, we're all sisters and need to look out for each other 💕   ~Toni
    • ToniTone
      Welcome ErinElizabeth! Love that name, that's beautiful that your wife is so supportive and helpful, she sounds lovely 💗   ~Toni
    • ToniTone
      I didn't get misgendered at work today! I wore foundation in addition to my usual eye and lip makeup, and though (to me anyway) subtle, it seemed to make a difference! I waahed it off before bed, but I'll do it again and take a pic tomorrow so I can get your thoughts... 
    • RH+/-
      Thank You both for the replies!    I haven't considered the downloadable pamphlets, because she doesn't speak english (there isn't too much information about this in our country) , and I thought it was enough what I was explaining to her, but I might be saying something wrong, or she might misunderstood me somehow. I don't know yet, so I'm gonna try again.  I'm gonna post an introduction soon, and I'd like to interact with the people here. I found transgender people are one of the most patient and nicest people out there, so thank you for blindly accepting me! :)    Heiko
    • Adrian Doyle
      Thanks so much for the advice! I  just talked to my parents about cutting my hair, and they seem cool with the wig idea too!  ٩( ᐛ )و
    • Adrian Doyle
      They’re all so cool! Keep up the amazing work!
    • Lucca
      I got some makeup that was serviceable but pretty crappy from Amazon by just blindly guessing what would work for me, but later after I came out to some friends they went shopping with me at Macy's where a very friendly attendant matched with some makeup, did my whole face, and gave me some samples to keep using before I bought anything. Are you out to anyone who could take you yet? It's way less intimidating if you're not going by yourself.
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, JoniSteph.  I hope that you find all the answers you need and all the encouragement you desire in these forums and among our terrific members.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • NB Adult
      There you go, you're already on a roll!
    • Aidan5
      I do have comic ideas in mind. But for some friends I might start being their concept artist, they said they would pay me. That's the goal
    • OliverPerry
      My current therapist (not specialized in gender identity issues) is the first and only person I've shared the daily struggle I face with my body .  She tried to understand me at first but dismissed it after only two sessions. Her reason: my posture wasn't "manly" enough to qualify as FTM. Many of my hobbies fit the "male" category though, that is the "geeky male" category not the all "macho" one. I don't like sports but I'm quite into gaming and comic books. However, like many, I also enjoy non "gender specific activities" of course. I don't act "manly" so it is easy for me to hide the fact that I'm not ok with my female body. The way I move and speak hide my male self. My posture is shy and awkward and my vocal cords only seem to produce girly sounds. I wish my voice was deeper but it isn't. I'm a bloody soprano leggero, which is rather high. With vocal lessons though, my voice has dropped but just slightly so, it's still very girl-like. I'm not into skirts or dresses, I attempted to be but ended up going back to pants. I like t-shirts with images from movies and games but I also like skinny trousers with prints.  What kills me ends up being the way I move and talk. My awkward, shy and geeky self makes people perceive me simply as a quirky girl.  I've been experience body dysphoria ever since I was 12 (I'm 24 now). Still, my therapist didn't believe I could be trans because I don't "act like a man" and the fact that I've never felt attraction towards a girl and like blokes instead didn't help me much.   I don't believe you have to fit the male stereotype to qualify. So what if your tastes aren't all considered "guy tastes"? If you feel miserable in a female body, no matter your interests, there's indeed a possibility you might be FTM.   I've scheduled an appointment with a therapist who specializes in this matters and I'm hoping to finally be properly heard. Maybe you could do the same. I think it could help you clarify your situation. I find it a bit scary though. I'm afraid it'll make me go into an even darker place. Still, I believe it must be done. Think about it. No rush.    I hope this helped a bit. I really wouldn't discard the possibility. I know cis guys who share many interests, no matter what gender this interests are normally associated with.
    • NB Adult
      Do you have plans as a book or comic illustrator? Writers and businesses pay illustrators well and I'm sure there are many venues that would appreciate your talents.
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...