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Experiment today went really well!!


Ronin82

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I've been on T for about 4 months now, and my voice has really deepened. I don't bind, but I do wear baggy shirts and strong sports bra at work, so I'm starting to get called "sir" a lot more now.? I have not socially transitioned, nor do I really do any guiding when people use a gender assumption on me, I just go with whatever people want to believe. Today, I had an opportunity to experiment with being more assertive about the process, so I took advantage.  We had a shipment of hay come in, and I had to direct the delivery guys to the feed barn and show them where to offload. Delivery guys turned out to be a couple of OLD hay farmers/ranchers, we're talking some REAL good-ole-boys. I hung out to do the directing, and found out they were short a man to offload. Not wanting these two old gents (one of them must have been 70 or 80) to break anything or keel over of a heart attack, I step in to help. 150 square bales of hay, at about 40-60# apiece, and they all had to be individually offloaded, carried into the barn, and stacked. I volunteered to be the middle man. During the conversation I could tell these guys were a little confused about what to call me, the younger guy even caught himself from judging my gender at least once. They asked my name, and I almost blurted out my female name, but decided to use my current androgynous name. They heard a male version of what I said! As soon as that was established, they started using male pronouns, and being "real guys" with me there. I never said anything, just let things go on, but had a great time putting on my public "male" face, and totally fitting in with these old farmers! I was even able to keep up with them during the very exhausting activity! This experiment was a total success!

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15 hours ago, Ronin82 said:

 They asked my name, and I almost blurted out my female name, but decided to use my current androgynous name. They heard a male version of what I said! As soon as that was established, they started using male pronouns, and being "real guys" with me there. I never said anything, just let things go on, but had a great time putting on my public "male" face, and totally fitting in with these old farmers! I was even able to keep up with them during the very exhausting activity! This experiment was a total success!

 

Excellent post on many levels, first that you are taking a casual approach to dress and presentation which always helps because you aren't uptight and overly self conscious about your looks which always makes it easy for others to read you. Second because you jumped right in and helped the old guys get-er-done, a manly act in and of itself! And finally how you were perceived (above). Two thumbs up Ronin!

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 11/3/2019 at 11:24 AM, NB Adult said:

 

Excellent post on many levels, first that you are taking a casual approach to dress and presentation which always helps because you aren't uptight and overly self conscious about your looks which always makes it easy for others to read you. Second because you jumped right in and helped the old guys get-er-done, a manly act in and of itself! And finally how you were perceived (above). Two thumbs up Ronin!

Totally agree with NB here.  It is an amazing story of a normally every day event that totally made you feel validated.  I'm looking forward to some of this when I am starting to present more female.  For now I think I am being viewed as a gay male.  But I am presenting male so I am ok with that since its apparent my feminine side is shining through.

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  • 5 months later...

That's awesome!  I've been discovering that it isn't one thing that has others see me as "female", but a number of cues I present, with a major one being attitude.  I think your attitude today showed you're one of the guys as much as anything else you present.  "See a problem and fix it" attitude.  Good job!

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Thanks for all the great feedback. As an update, the old man who delivers the hay now asks for me specifically when he delivers to our barn. He likes having me help apparently, and he even taught me how to pitch hay and aim it so it rolls to the spot you want it to go. Still doesn't ask about pronouns, and his second (someone young and fit last time), started cracking man-jokes while we worked. So yeah, I fit in as a guy for sure!

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Yay!☺️?Sounds like a good time. Wish I could farm. Hope all is well.

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