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How long did you wait?


Madelyn

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I’ve know for several years that I’m trans. I should have seen it long before that, but blamed it on kink, just wrote it off, and all the others things one in denial does. There is a long back story to everything, but to make it more so to the point (I’m horrible at that, btw. Details details lol ) my wife and I are both accepting of my being transgender. We have both always wanted a big family, and have a son now. We’ve discussed fostering, adopting, etc. Something that’s important to her is experiencing the wonder of pregnancy with our own children, as well as helping children in need. So, we’ve decided putting hrt off until then. The thing is that I’m feeling more and more dysphoric as time goes by. We are ttc (trying to conceive) now. I’m super excited for another as well. I feel selfish for wanting hrt now (not that it solidifies me as a woman, but I really feel I need it) Freezing sperm is so expensive. Just looking for ways to cope until then. I try and stay positive and thankful for all the things I do have. I feel so dysphoric lately though, as I believe it has to do with my coming out more publicly 

 

Tldr: Trying to conceive and holding off on hrt. What helped or is helping you during your wait for hrt?

 

Thank you,

Madelyn

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  • Forum Moderator

Good luck in your loving pursuits!  Enjoy that special time.

I found that making little changes in my appearance by plucking my eyebrows helped me as i waited.  Like you once i had accepted that i wanted to transition i was somehow driven to get the process moving.  Maybe the best advice is to take a breath and realize that transition is a verb.  I've found that it's a continuous, ongoing process rather than one step makes it complete.  Relaxing and accepting make that journey more comfortable.

Time will move you along your journey.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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  • Forum Moderator

Madelyn, I think you are doing a very good thing for both youself and your wife.  With her support you both can get through this, and with any luck, experience the joy of having a few children of your own.  You're both are making sacrifices to make this family happen but down the road this short detour will be so worth it for you as your family grows and the love shared with one another.

 

My Best,

Susan R?

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5 hours ago, Charlize said:

Good luck in your loving pursuits!  Enjoy that special time.

I found that making little changes in my appearance by plucking my eyebrows helped me as i waited.  Like you once i had accepted that i wanted to transition i was somehow driven to get the process moving.  Maybe the best advice is to take a breath and realize that transition is a verb.  I've found that it's a continuous, ongoing process rather than one step makes it complete.  Relaxing and accepting make that journey more comfortable.

Time will move you along your journey.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Thank you! It’s so hard being patient with the dysphoric feelings. I find I feel content and then, before long, I want more. Like, the taste of being myself is more and more liberating that I get a little too “thirsty” for more of a change right away. I know you’re so right though, so I really am trying to live in the now and be happy with the woman I already am.

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5 hours ago, Susan R said:

Madelyn, I think you are doing a very good thing for both youself and your wife.  With her support you both can get through this, and with any luck, experience the joy of having a few children of your own.  You're both are making sacrifices to make this family happen but down the road this short detour will be so worth it for you as your family grows and the love shared with one another.

 

My Best,

Susan R?

Thank you for your kind words! 

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