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Transitioning before coming out?


OliverPerry

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Hello, my online mates!

 

I can't stop. TransPulse has become my brand new secret addiction.

 

Quick silly question...

(This will be my attempt at being brief. I seem to overdo it when posting.)

Has anyone started their transition before coming out? 

If so, how was the reaction of the people around you when the changes started to occur?

 

I think I've just done it! 

A short post!

 

I'll pat myself on the back now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I did. I thought I was going to wait until I presented more naturally as female before I came out. But within a couple months I was itching to dress out and unleash the real me.

 

It went well all amd all. A few not-so-close people abandoned me. But most of the important ones stayed. I'm happy i fid it. 

 

Welcome to our forum! ?

 

~Toni

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I am Pre-T but I presented myself as male before I came out to my family. I cut my hair, which they flipped on haha.

 

I wish I could have transitioned before coming out, because my stepmom says that she won't believe that I am trans until I get bottom surgery. She kinda crazy tho so haha 

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I did as well.  I was self medicating on and off for years.  Though I never truly got to a feminine look.  I did grow breasts but not very big.  However I was quite obese so most prob just saw then as man boobs.  
I have since stopped my self hrt and waiting to get it done properly.  I e lost a bunch of weight n my breast are looking better but I’m mostly out now.  

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I'm unlikely to come out until I'm well along in transition (which may only be a partial transition). My therapist has suggested that I consider coming out. I've considered and decided it's nobody's business unless a) I want them to know or b) they're trying to "bed" me. Otherwise, I'll go about my life as I always do, with some minor changes (like wearing a swim shirt swimming so my nipples don't cause an uproar).

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I've actually started T while still living with my parents, and they don't know I'm trans. I've always dressed in masculine ways, had short-ish hair, and enjoyed masculine activities more than feminine ones. I've never been a girly-girl, no matter how hard my Mom tried to make me one! I was able to blame most of the "masculinity" on sensory comfort since I'm on the autism spectrum (Asperger's), but I'm mostly in the closet as a trans man. I've told two close friends, some supportive coworkers, and a couple of distant relatives, but my immediate family still doesn't know.

 

I told my parents that I was starting T as an unconventional treatment for some medical conditions, since I knew voice changes would happen quickly and I didn't want to freak them out too badly. It worked. I sound almost as deep as my brother, and they just don't realize what's REALLY going on! My therapist and I are making a plan for telling them the truth when I don't have to depend on them financially anymore, and I'm really looking forward to doing so, but I know it won't be a comfortable discussion. It's why I'm still closeted. I'll have to tell them right before top surgery, I'm sure, which is when I'll be socially and legally transitioning (during recovery).

 

All that to say, yes, I started transitioning LOOOOOOONG before I came out.

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This is not a unique thing Ronan, I started HRT back in 94 and have never officially "Came Out" to anyone. As the changes took place everyone just assumed that I have become different. I've even been asked by nervy people who don't even know me if I'm MtF or FtM and I think it's hilarious, and I usually respond with, "I dunno, take your pick!" 

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57 minutes ago, NB Adult said:

I've even been asked by nervy people who don't even know me if I'm MtF or FtM and I think it's hilarious, and I usually respond with, "I dunno, take your pick!" 

Now that's when you can say you are NB.  When no one knows and has to ask.  LOL

 

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