FaceApp. Bloody brilliant or a bloody lie?

[OliverPerry]

Hey, mates!

 

So, I was wondering whether any of you were ever curious enough to try an app called "FaceApp" (note: Believe me, I'm not being paid for this!). I've discovered it back in 2017 and, currently, it seems people have become obsessed with it all of the sudden.

It's amusing yes. And, in my humble opinion, for pre-transition trans people is dreamlike (even if possibly misleading).

Basically, for those of you who are not aware of its existence, it's an app that can change your appearance. You upload a pic onto the app and you can change your facial features. For example, you can see yourself as an old lady or man and even apply a smile to your face, which, mates, I gotta tell you, looks so real it's frightening. For me, the best available feature of all is the gender swap. If you're physically a woman, you can see yourself as man, and, if you're physically a bloke, you can see yourself as a woman. And, in my opinion, it still bloody looks like you, it's the same person you'll see, just physically as the opposite gender. Again, frightening. 

 

I know it's silly mentioning this here but it's something that has kept me amused and has provided me with a bit of joy over the past years, even if just slightly so. I'm not saying all of you should try it! I'm just saying that, in my case, it feels like a small treat whenever I use it.

 

Now that I'm out (family not included), I'm confident enough to show you my current physical traits. Maybe you won't share the same feeling with me and would never attempt such a thing but I'm willing to do it now and I won't feel upset over it. It's just how it is. Currently I look female. So what? That's about to change anyway. All a matter of time. And I believe I kinda look boyish when I cut my hair, even without taking T. You'll get what I mean when you look at the pics. And, actually, straight guys still try to... you know... even with my hair short. Hmm, maybe they're not so straight after all... Well, they were willing to sleep with a bloke, they just didn't know they were dealing with one XD Bless them...

 

Usually, from what I've seen, people get drastic (but incredibly believable) changes. Not me. The changes are rather small so I guess I really must already look like a boy. 

Oh and, hopefully, you'll keep treating me as a bloke. Remember, this "girl" is nothing but a 5ft lie. Don't be fooled. 

 

Quick thought: The thing that makes me kinda confused whether this is strangely accurate or not, I'm actually hoping that it is (I admit it, I'm ok with this look, I'm hoping for a bit of stubble though  ), is this: When you see my after pic, try imagining my skin darker and then you'll know how my brother looks like. We basically become twins, one pale and one really tanned. Yeah, my skin is really light, I have strong issues when dealing with sunlight so I never allow myself the chance to get tanner, the pics don't represent how it actually looks like. Well, anyway, this doesn't matter. Continuing... My brother is 5ft7. Yes, we are not the tallest of families and I'm the shortest one of all. 5ft for life! So, twins but only facially wise. 

 

Well, here it is!

Lying Girl me vs Hidden Bloke me

 

I'm getting nervous here...

Please remember: I'm still Oliver! Don't treat me any differently. 

 

Oh! And those of you who have been to Scotland, are into theatre and are strangely recognizing me from a play I did in the past, keep this confidential and just ignore the creature you saw on stage, it doesn't exist.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[OliverPerry]

Hmm... now that I've posted this I'm doubting myself. 

 

Because I don't see many changes with the before and after, I'm wondering whether it's true that I already look boyish or that I look girlish with my short hair and will keep looking like that even as a boy... I'm confuse now. I know this is not an "accurate representation", it's just an app but, still, it messes with my head. 

Everyone else I know who tried this app just looked so incredibly different while so bloody similar! 

I don't get it... I hope this is happened because I already have a boyish looking face... Well, I have stolen roles from young boys in the past so maybe that's it, maybe it's true that I can look like a boy even without T. I do hope this is the case...

 

I guess I need the stubble and the bloke shoulders. They're my only hope! 

Curves be gone!

 

Also, maybe I shouldn't have posted my current physical appearance... Bloody hell... At the same time I don't want to delete this because this is reality and I have to accept that things are currently like this, even though they are indeed going to change. I have to start seeing the world as it is and work myself towards a better life.

I won't delete this.

I want to.

But I won't.

This might sound strange to some of you but I think it's important to have it out in the open.

 

[OliverPerry]

40 minutes ago, MaryMary said:

It's like... a punch right in the dysphoria

 

It is yes.

At the same time, in my case at least, it feels good when you're looking at it though and have dreamlike thoughts. Still, it does increase dysphoria when you realize what's actually real.

 

Truth be told, dysphoria is kicking in just for the fact that I've posted this... 

[DeeDee]

Oliver that 2nd pic (looking up) looks like a 90's indie band album cover, it gave off a Shed Seven/Super Furry Animals vibe. (compliment btw) Buy yourself an ex army jacket with some ripped jeans and Cat boots and you would look exactly like many of the guys I knew growing up.

 

You should only show yourself online if you choose to because once it is on the internet it never really goes away, the mods will delete the pics if you change your mind and I have never seen anything but positivity on this site. I am too scared to share my face publicly just in case someone I know wanders in somehow before I am ready, but have shared my ugly mug privately with folks during conversations.

 

I have used the SnapChat FaceApp and did both genders - it took my (male at the time) face and literally turned me into a man I did not recognise complete with square jaw - but the female and normal girly fun filters barely changed my face shape and worked really well and they made me feel genuinely pretty - which is of course exactly what they are supposed do ? - I share a strong family resemblance with 2 of my sisters and the app is genuinely accurate. One of them is now a profile pic elsewhere precisely because it was nice and normal looking and the other is on my blog because with the filter no one would guess it was me day to day.

 

The fact that boy you changed less just means you already have traditional masculine features.

 

It is dangerous to rely on for what you will look like post treatment because it will bulk/shave facial features and my understanding is that your bone structure won't alter, but as a rough guide; a pick me up, or a bit of fun they are awesome.

 

Oh and here you will always be Oliver until you ask folks to call you something else. ?

[NB Adult]

Oliver, you have excellent features. Consider your face to be the palette for either that of a boy or even a gender neutral androgynous young man. I'd give anything for eyebrows like yours as my own are very light and sketchy. Eyebrows give the face character and are important for facial expression. Good job Bud!

[OliverPerry]

2 hours ago, DeeDee said:

The fact that boy you changed less just means you already have traditional masculine features.

 

It is dangerous to rely on for what you will look like post treatment because it will bulk/shave facial features and my understanding is that your bone structure won't alter, but as a rough guide; a pick me up, or a bit of fun they are awesome.

 

Oh and here you will always be Oliver until you ask folks to call you something else.

 

I hope you're right. Already having traditional masculine features sure seems wonderful and, if it's true, I'll definitely take it!

 

Oh yes, we can't forget about facial hair (shaven or not, its presence will be there and the skin is bound to change appearance because of it) and I guess body hair will happen as well, wouldn't bother me that, kinda hoping to keep some skin bare though. I gotta admit, I'm not really wishing for a "Chewbacca look". Oh well, whatever happens happens. There's always laser! Not very excited about that though. If needed, my back will suffer ahahaha.

 

I truly appreciate the Oliver thing. I will never disclose my birth name. At the moment, it taunts me every time I look at my ID. *shiver*

[OliverPerry]

2 hours ago, NB Adult said:

Eyebrows give the face character and are important for facial expression. Good job Bud!

 

Ahahah they're just like that naturally, it's not an accomplishment, I didn't do anything. Well, that's the reason they're like that I guess, the fact that I don't do anything to them nowadays. Good job at doing nothing, Oliver! Hell yeah! 

Will they grow more when I start T though? Will my eyes disappear eventually? Will my face become eyebrow? Hmmm I wonder... 

 

 

[NB Adult]

???Love your sense of humor, you are indeed a riot! 

[OliverPerry]

1 hour ago, MaryMary said:

I don't know if you read or saw harry potter

 

Oh no, please don't. Don't Harry Potter me! You'll release a beast! 

Harry bloody Potter follows me wherever I go, taunting me with the fact that it's just fiction and that I will never be able to experience Hogwarts in real life. I wrote tons of stories that are currently hidden in my laptop about me (the boy me) receiving "the letter" and going to that wonderful but, in reality, extremely dangerous school (I would probably be a bit afraid of letting my kids study there actually. And Quidditch? How is it even allowed? I love it but, mates, for those of you who know about it, you gotta agree, when playing it, there's definitely a chance of death). But yes, it's my guilty pleasure. Don't care if it's girly, I bloody love it and it has kept me going for a while. Whenever I feel bad, I just think JK Rowling is real and she may have many faults but that woman made Harry Potter happen and, because of her, for me, life might be worth living. 

I'll stop now. 

I apologize but a person can't expect to say the words "Harry Potter" to me and not receive a bloody monologue. 

 

By the way, are you talking about the mirror of Erised? I understand that it may not be good for us trans folk. Supposedly, not many have lost their minds looking at it (but yes, some did though). However, it will indeed make us see our deepest desire and that's kinda sad because it's simply not reality as it is or will be.

Actually (I'll apologize for geeky me but I need to say what follows), Dumbledore told a thing to Harry in the Philosopher's Stone which goes something like this (not the exact words, it's much better written than this, but the meaning is there): You shouldn't keep obsessing over dreams, you should live. 

About three years ago, when I read the book again, years after childhood, I became extremely upset. I found Dumbledore to be right, living was the right thing to do, dreams are not reality. My dream of releasing myself from this body/prison was merely a dream and not possible to achieve, life was cruel but it was an unavoidable reality. Now, I think differently. No, I won't obsess over dreams, my reality is mine to change and some dreams can transform into something real if you do something about them. I won't dream about living as a boy anymore, I'll do it, I will do anything it takes to achieve my goal. It's not a dream, I'm not obsessing over something solely belonging to my imaginary, I'm obsessing over life. 

 

I had to share this. Dumbledore's words, even if fictional, had an incredibly strong impact on my life. Now I have a different opinion about them though, I still think what he said is true, I just see it in another light.

[OliverPerry]

2 hours ago, MaryMary said:

t's hard to give comments to photos. In my case one of my childhood friend looked a little like you so given you have nothing feminine on I'm totally seeing him in the pictures. That's a thing that I don't like in my own life, we are our worst critics and we listen more to negative comments because of how we feel inside. It's sad for me to read you have a lot of dysphoria and see so much of my friend in your photos. I would love to give you a hug and just erase that so that you just don't have to feel how I feel. I know it's hard.

 

I hope you'll find your path and be happy

 

I'm so overly excited with you telling me this about your friend. It really made me feel a lot better.

And you're right, we are indeed our worst critics. Most of us believe the bad thoughts to be too real, even when they're not, and easily fall into dark places with the tiniest push. 

Oh, sorry about the Harry Potter comment/answer by the way. I hope I didn't go too far. 

 

[OliverPerry]

1 hour ago, NB Adult said:

???Love your sense of humor, you are indeed a riot! 

 

Always happy to amuse.

*hat tip*

[TommieAnne]

While the obvious girl photo looks girlish, the short haired images all look male to me.

Don't know if that helps. But to me it seems you could be just "one of the guys" - which is handy, since you are.

[OliverPerry]

1 hour ago, MaryMary said:

I studied in litterature, believe it or not. Your comment is pure joy to read. lol

the mirror of Erised, amongst many other little things in Harry Potter, is a great addition to my fictionnal compilation of great human mythologies. I'm sure you got my comparison between the mirror and faceapp, lol For a trans person at least...

 

 

 

oh... and you didn't go far enough... tihihi

 

Bloody hell, you actually had the chance to study Harry Potter in literature? 

If that had happened to me I would most likely have been top student! 

Missed opportunity here!

 

Quick thought: 

A friend of mine told me there's a course somewhere that merely focuses on "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer".

It's not really my thing but, if that's true, then there must be a Harry Potter one. 

Maybe I could get a job as a HP teacher... Earn some extra pounds. I know most spells anyway. 

I even have a wand. The wand no one wants to get, Remus Lupin's. 

I'm constantly compared to Neville Longbottom though (I'm extremely clumsy and forgetful, it's a bit frightening how much actually) and he's very dear to me. Bloody hell, the candy wrapper scene... I don't believe they show it in the films. The part where they are at St Mungos and they see Neville visiting his parents and his poor mother, void of thought, gives him an empty candy wrapper... Depressing stuff.

But yes, Remus Lupin is my favourite of all. And, even though he's quite old for the part (supposedly in the books, Remus is young, in his thirties I believe, yet his hair already has many silver locks), David Thewlis is bloody great. He was brilliant in Mike Leigh's film "Naked". I kinda have a messed up crush on him as Remus. I found out recently he was born in the same year as my dad though. I feel quite weirded out by that honestly...

 

I can still continue.

So, beware!

 

 

 

[OliverPerry]

56 minutes ago, TammyAnne said:

While the obvious girl photo looks girlish, the short haired images all look male to me.

Don't know if that helps. But to me it seems you could be just "one of the guys" - which is handy, since you are.

 

The long hair will be gone next week.

I'm going back to the short one. 

If if my short haired pic without face app actually looks male, then bloody hell how cool is that?

 

Big dream of mine: being "one of the guys". 

 

And the hair will be gone!

Freedom at last!

 

Actually, my mother is always insisting for me to go back to short hair. I've been denying her request because I was frightened of seeing myself again in a boyish way, something that I love so much it hurts. That's why I ended up letting my hair grow, I wanted to deny the truth, to attempt to embrace the "girl life". I can't do it anymore though. I'm going for short again! Mommy will love it. That is until she finds out what's truly happening inside my head and the changes that will begin in a few months.

 

Don't worry, mom! My hair will still be short. You like it short! 

Poor thing... She's an expert at denial. It's going to be hard not being able to deny something so big though. 

[ShawnaLeigh]

8 hours ago, TammyAnne said:

While the obvious girl photo looks girlish, the short haired images all look male to me.

Don't know if that helps. But to me it seems you could be just "one of the guys" - which is handy, since you are.

This is my opinion too.  Honest and true.  I see a guy in the short hair photos.  

When I read your posts I hear a "guys voice" in my head sort to speak.  You are a very good writer and I see it as male.

 

[Maid In Bedlam]

Quote

You grant FaceApp a perpetual, irrevocable, nonexclusive, royalty-free, worldwide, fully-paid, transferable sub-licensable license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, publicly perform and display your User Content and any name, username or likeness provided in connection with your User Content in all media formats and channels now known or later developed, without compensation to you. When you post or otherwise share User Content on or through our Services, you understand that your User Content and any associated information (such as your [username], location or profile photo) will be visible to the public.

 

 

Quote

You grant FaceApp consent to use the User Content, regardless of whether it includes an individual’s name, likeness, voice or persona, sufficient to indicate the individual’s identity. By using the Services, you agree that the User Content may be used for commercial purposes. You further acknowledge that FaceApp’s use of the User Content for commercial purposes will not result in any injury to you or to any person you authorized to act on its behalf.

 

So say for instance just as a senario. You are in your own closet. Faceapp can use your picture of you as male or female whichever the case maybe on a bill board across the raod from you for all to see and there is not a darn thing you can do about it. To top that they do not even have to pay you royalitys for said use.

 

You really should read the terms and conditions before doing this.

 

Didnt facebook try these terms and conditions a few years back and everyone who used it created hell about photos being your own interlectual property?

 

I Would not give anyone permission to use at random any of my information, pictures, or rantings

 

Just saying. You do not mind at some point in the furture them making money of you publically ridiiculing you or in fact doing absolutly anything they want  then your good to go

[Jani]

1 hour ago, Maid In Bedlam said:

I Would not give anyone permission to use at random any of my information, pictures, or rantings

 

Correct.  You have signed away your rights to any image with this app.

[OliverPerry]

3 hours ago, Maid In Bedlam said:

 

 

 

So say for instance just as a senario. You are in your own closet. Faceapp can use your picture of you as male or female whichever the case maybe on a bill board across the raod from you for all to see and there is not a darn thing you can do about it. To top that they do not even have to pay you royalitys for said use.

 

You really should read the terms and conditions before doing this.

 

Didnt facebook try these terms and conditions a few years back and everyone who used it created hell about photos being your own interlectual property?

 

I Would not give anyone permission to use at random any of my information, pictures, or rantings

 

Just saying. You do not mind at some point in the furture them making money of you publically ridiiculing you or in fact doing absolutly anything they want  then your good to go

 

What you say might be true but, let's face it, mates: For some people, myself included, when they have the chance to try something like FaceApp, they don't think about those kind of consequences.

And the fact that they can use my male/female pictures is not something that I'm unfamiliar with.

I've been in the closet for a long time and never once believed I would come out. So it was never really a problem for me that it would become public awareness that I had used the app. For all everyone knew, I was just another person having a laugh.

 

And all social media has that power, not only FaceApp.

For example: most people have facebook. They post pictures and thoughts for all to see and download onto their computers if they please. It doesn't matter if term and conditions change.

I'm aware that, once you post stuff, they're not solely yours anymore. 

 

In my case, my "female image" is already out there. It's my tool of work. 

The 5ft girl body I've been living in has provided me with the necessary pounds to live daily.

This is something that has had a great impact on my previous refusal to come out. 

The risk I'm taking by choosing to transition is massive.

 

I realize that I would never be able to hide the fact that I was born a girl and it doesn't have anything to do with physical appearance.

If I continue working (*fingers bloody crossed*), I have to accept that I'm not going to be a male actor like the others. I'm gonna be a trans male actor. 

I'm not "famous", mates, but I've been working professionally nonstop as an "actress" for years. I've made a name for myself, and that name isn't "Oliver Perry". 

 

I never posted "nude" or "sexy" (shiver) pics online, not even in a private message. I never actually took something like that, so there's absolutely no record of extremely personal images of me anywhere. But yes, everything I posted was with previous thought.

 

How would they use my pics to ridicule me? Would they say: Oh look at Oliver! He used to be a girl! Yeah, well, everyone will think that already. It's not something I could ever deny, even without social media. 

 

So, it's not that I "do not mind at some point in the furture them making money of you publically ridiiculing you or in fact doing absolutly anything they want  then your good to go". 

Mates, once you post on a social media platform, you're risking that.

Social media is, besides my physical body, a work tool for me and I don't regret taking that risk. 

 

I apologize if I appeared aggressive but this is just how I see things.

I'm only referring to my personal experience and how I perceive the risks in my case.

I can't speak for everyone. 

 

To finalize:

No, I don't think that's an issue for me because I'm certain real life will make a much better job at ridiculing me, especially when still in transition. 

 

 

 

 

[Maid In Bedlam]

13 hours ago, OliverPerry said:

 

I apologize if I appeared aggressive but this is just how I see things.

 

 

 

Nah your ok Pal. You got your point over. I did not see any aggression.

 

 

There have been many instances where a picture posted in all innocence has been used for ridicule to the point where it has made them into a public laughing stock. One that I can name in my time online was the mosh girl (Do feel free to google the name).

 

It was about 2005. This poor girl had a picture of her dancing. But it was just one of those taken pictures at precisely the wrong moment. This poor woman was then and still is sometimes. Ridiculed for the picture. At the time she begged to have it taken down but this was not fourthcoming.. In fact, no one seemed to care what memes this picture was used for. Needless to say. The poor woman had to withdraw from the internet and on the whole, her life was made a complete misery. I would not want to wish that on anyone.
Problem being is once you post a picture. That picture will never be completely removed. Someone somewhere has it downloaded or it is sitting in a server somewhere. But with these characters you are giving them permission to do whatever they fancy.

 

One thing I am glad of is your tenacity that everyone knowing your past would not hurt you. I wish you could give some of this to those who have little.  I'm sure you must be one of the very few who can claim this as I read many factual posts on here from members who are so scared of the reactions of them coming out or even  it being known that they have an interest in clothing of the opposite gender that it would prove too much for them to be able to handle because of the reactions of others.

 

 

 I am also alarmed by is the attitude towald  personal privacy and not being too concerned about who would be able to use your picture or indeed anything else known about you without any input or indeed gain of your own personal health and wealth. Any picture of me used in the media would be charged at a flat rate of £1000 per use. Which would be a contractual obligation pre-use of said picture. To think you could be the face of some major brand product and have no say or indeed financial gain or control over would be quite wrong. However, this does not seem to concern anymore.

 

What also surprises is the attitude that personal privacy  of many does no longer matter anymore. I'm an old woman and once upon a time we valued this above anything else. I know the world has changed and now we will be quite happy to have a device that listened to our every word in our homes. Once upon a time, this was called spying. It would have been not allowed without a court order by police etc. Now we actually pay for them and  cannot wait to tell alexa to do something for us. As we agree in principal the moment we plug it in.

 

To finalise.

 

I do hope that Oliver is a rich and famous one day. Perhaps Olivers Army. The new boy band of the 2000 and 20s then pictures taken now will be used for all the right reasons.

 

I am now sorry if i sound like im preaching from a paulpit. But I suppose i have learnt from the school of life for longer what can happen should our control of what happens with our lives is taken from us

 

 

[Ellora]

I have not used Faceapp yet, but I will surely give it a try! I fell in love with the SnapChat  gender swap app the second I tried it! I have been waiting forever to see myself as a women in a picture. As soon as I took the pictures, I couldn’t stop until I found the correct angle(s), ? It gives me hope, yes hope, even if they are p’shopped with a filter. every time I see the picture, I feel happy and smile. 

Having facial hair makes it difficult for me to cover it with makeup. Even if I am lucky with a good shave, it still makes me paranoid every second that goes by, stubble will pop through the makeup. So until I get electrolysis done, I am going to keep using the special filters. 

[NB Adult]

On 11/25/2019 at 5:18 AM, Maid In Bedlam said:

Just saying. You do not mind at some point in the furture them making money of you publically ridiiculing you or in fact doing absolutly anything they want  then your good to go

 

Actually the notion of privacy in today's world is a myth. One doesn't ever have to be on a social networking site either as there are organizations that know all about each of us and if they so wished could tell exactly how many squares of tissue we use on average in the loo in a month's time. Understanding that makes it all the easier to post one's mugshot here and frankly it is rather liberating. There's nowhere to hide, so quit wasting your time and energy and come out of your imaginary closets!

[Ellora]

The only part that makes you look like a “girl” is the long hair in the first pic. The short hair makes you look like a cute male. I would not worry one bit if I were you. IMO, go out the and be who you want to be, own it, and show it, and you shouldn’t have one issue. Confidence is key. (Fake the confidence if you have to, you got this, totally.) 

[ShawnaLeigh]

17 hours ago, NB Adult said:

Understanding that makes it all the easier to post one's mugshot here and frankly it is rather liberating.

Agreed.  

[TTheta]

Just looking at the pictures, I couldn't tell you were female at all! You look like a dude to me, and that's being 100% honest bro. I really liked the haircut, I just wish I could decide on a haircut fro myself haha. Maybe I should look into this app you speak of.

[Josie Beth]

I have used it to see how it would change my face into the image I want to see but it can only be done so many times and then I got bored and uninstalled it. But it’s definitely a benchmark for my future look. However I’m never going to look as young as they made it look. And my features are just a tad sharper until my body fat goes up. So I look more like Saga from Dreamfall Chapters. It’s weird. I’m even considering wearing a blue grey wig some time.