Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Damien Mcknight

I got the big sad

Recommended Posts

Damien Mcknight

I’m not sure if this is the right place to vent, so sorry if it’s not qwq. Basically I feel like crap. Tomorrow is thanksgiving and I’m at a family member’s house. Since it’s my step dad’s family, idk many people. There are a couple of girls here my age but I don’t think they like me. I think I’m too weird. Idk. They don’t talk to me really and it’s worse cuz idk how to start a conversation. So yea, that’s basically it

Share this post


Link to post
NB Adult  (Inactive)
53 minutes ago, Ethan Mcknight said:

I’m not sure if this is the right place to vent, so sorry if it’s not qwq. Basically I feel like crap. Tomorrow is thanksgiving and I’m at a family member’s house. Since it’s my step dad’s family, idk many people. There are a couple of girls here my age but I don’t think they like me. I think I’m too weird. Idk. They don’t talk to me really and it’s worse cuz idk how to start a conversation. So yea, that’s basically it

 

Hang in there Ethan and toughen up, it's just a one day holiday and if you can grin and bear it then it will be over in no time and in your rear view mirror. Meanwhile, smile a lot and be responsive and give conversation your best shot, it may be a great learning experience for you because we have to get along as best we can even if some people think we are weird, you know of course that any negative thoughts they may have about you are their problem and not yours.

Share this post


Link to post
Carolyn Marie

I've found that in social situations where I don't know anyone, or just a couple of people, it is hard to break the ice and make small talk.  The best way is to just suck up your fear and discomfort, approach the friendliest-looking person in the room, and say, "hey, whatsup?"  Or talk about some food you all had, or a movie you saw, or just how you feel about anything.  Small talk starts small, but gets bigger the longer the convo lasts.  Pretty soon you'll be sharing laughs.  So stop hugging that wall and get out there among 'em. 

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn

Share this post


Link to post
Damien Mcknight

Pfft, you guesses exactly what I was doing, just sitting in the corner with my ipad. But thanks for the support y’all 

Share this post


Link to post
Charlize

Hiding with a screen may well isolate you more?  

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Share this post


Link to post
VickySGV

Show you are listening to people and laugh or sigh in the appropriate places and soon you will fit in "somehow".  If you are off in a corner, you will stay there.  I have bad hearing so sometimes I don't even really hear what is being said, but if I look approachable, someone notices and something nice happens, 

Share this post


Link to post
Juelie_Atlas

I've always had issues with crowds of people and having spent holidays with my wife's family for years, the corner of the room was the place to be for the longest time. But I had to learn then, as a man, that I can't stay in the corner. I am not completely out and cannot show my true self as of yet, but that will come.

 

My wife helped me by being at my side. Find someone you know and like, and just stay with them. They will make introductions or at least have a conversation you may end up knowing something about. At worst, you may learn something new and never have one word to say. At best, you make a connection and a friend

 

Best of luck during these holidays!

❤️

Share this post


Link to post
TammyAnne

 Crowds are tough. Holidays are tough.

Put them together and things really get rocky.

You're not alone in feeling the distress. In fact, there's quite a segment of the general population having something between anxiety and a total meltdown over the holidays.

Just muddle through, manage a smile now and again. Spring is just around the corner!

TA

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   8 Members, 0 Anonymous, 118 Guests (See full list)

    • Susan R
    • Willa
    • AdriannaB
    • Lucca
    • Michelle F
    • AnAnxiousMess
    • Belle
    • JustineM
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      69,746
    • Total Posts
      630,342
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      6,095
    • Most Online
      8,356

    IBrown
    Newest Member
    IBrown
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Callie40
      Callie40
      (45 years old)
  • Posts

    • Susan R
      Hi Adrianna, This is wonderful news about your coming out to family and work.  as you are finding out, it gets easier as time goes on.  You start to care even less what others think of it, so much so, that you end up telling people you hadn’t even planned on coming out to in the course of your journey.  I had a question about your upcoming Breast Augmentation surgery.  I’m not sure how far along you are regarding the BA but is your surgeon concerned about you not having been on HRT prior to the surgery?  Once you've had the BA surgery and then down the road decide to start on HRT, your breasts can get so much larger than you had planned or possibly wanted (depending on your genetic disposition). My internal medicine doctor said that she wanted me on HRT at least a year if I wanted BA surgery.  I realize that other IM docs or endocrinologists may not be that conservative in their approach.   I am just curious if you’ve had this discussion yet.  In my case as it turns out, I’m not going to have any BA because I am almost where I want to be at 16 months HRT.   Congratulations on your coming out, Susan R🌷  
    • FrozenWinter
      Thank you very much for your warm welcomes and the compliment. I still have a lot to learn and am trying to be more open, so I will appreciate your advices and guidance and share my stories when I can.  By the way, we are preparing for Lunar New Year holiday (we call it Tet holiday) here in Vietnam as well as some other asian countries and I am so excited. 
    • Lucca
      Ok, so, I've talked about this on PM some, but for everyone else, my relationship with this friend is totally kaput now. I waited a couple weeks of no contact and then called her to talk, she started things off by saying that she forgave me because she assumed my hormone medication was making me unreasonable (which I do not believe is a fair assessment of the situation). Not really a great thing to say to a trans person, it's kind of like telling a cis woman with a personal grievance "you're being totally crazy, but it's ok because I assume you're on your period." She tried to claim some kind of enlightened, insider knowledge on gender transition and how crazy it makes people because she had been friends with another trans person in the past. This really threw me for a loop and I wasn't very collected the rest of the call, it was obvious I was getting choked up or crying and trying to power through it. She refused to talk about anything and just wanted to "move forward" and make plans for the immediate future without actually addressing anything. I forced the issue and she eventually apologized but was obviously very irritated and really didn't want to.   I called her the next day when I had regained my composure and told her in no uncertain terms that we can forgive and forget and agree to disagree on all the past stuff, but she cannot blame either my past behavior or any future behavior on these nonsense hormone issues she's making up. She got so mad when I said this that she was literally yelling at me over the phone within minutes, shouting about how I wasn't in my right mind because I was hormonal. So that's over!   Jesus Christ, what a nutcase. I am not wasting any more time with someone who thinks I'm a mental invalid who can't advocate for myself. I mean, HRT can cause mood swings in the early stages, but it's usually relatively minor. I doesn't cause people to lose their mind and do and say things that are entirely out of character that they don't mean, which is basically what she wanted me to admit to, to say "yeah, I was crazy 'cuz of the hormones, you were right about everything." My god, I've never been more insulted and talked down to in my life. Good riddance.
    • Michelle F
      Yea... success 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.jta.org/quick-reads/transgender-woman-gives-up-legal-fight-to-see-her-haredi-orthodox-children   This is a real shame, but I understand why the trans woman made her decision.  Shunning in such a close community would have ruined the lives of the children.  I think she made the right choice.   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, Michaela.  I love your spirit, and being mischievous is something I'm into, too.  I wish that all spouses were as supportive as yours, so give her a hug for us.  Please look around and have something to say, because we'll be here to read and listen.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, My Lung.  I think you may well be our first member from Vietnam, so that makes you extra special.  Please ask any questions you wish, and join in any of the conversations.  We will help as much as we can.  BTW, your English is excellent!   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      My goodness, that is one of the worst things I've heard @Laura76, and I've been here a long time.  So needlessly cruel and heartless.  Born-again Christian?  Christ would be appalled.  There is nothing Christian about what your family is doing to you.  I'm so sorry.  😢   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Susan R
      Thanks @Jani  I just received a reply email from my ex in response to mine thanking her for driving all the way up here from her home to see my wife and I, and of course, for the nice vase of flowers she brought us.  She wrote that since her visit she has come up with more questions and will be compiling them and will ask at a future date..lol  It looks like she is really trying to learn and understand me though.  That’s more than I expected out of it but it was part of my intention of having her over for dinner.   Update: This just in....as soon as she unpacks she is now having us over to her new place.  So in probably a month, I’ll be back for more..lol   Susan R🌷
    • ShawnaLeigh
      This is terrible.  How can someone that is suppose to love you be so mean.  I’m sorry it is like that’s for you.  😢
    • Robin68
      ❤️ My Lung I was very timid here also and did not speak up for a time. I was like Shawnaleigh. I have learned this is a very safe place and you are very welcome here! Your English is excellent! I live in an area where many Vietnamese have settled in the United States. I look forward to reading more of your comments!   Hugs! ❤️   Robin
    • AdriannaB
      Came out today,going to be Adrianna in March.At 15 years old,I questioned myself if I was really female from the inside and knew the answer was yes.On my list of things to do was go further into my journey of being Adrianna more.So far came out at work,to my wife,mom and my 3 sisters.So far so good and I started seeing a therapist last month.Transitioning,decided not to go on the HRT and doing it surgically on March 6th.Having the body contouring surgery,ffs and breast augmentation done.My wife Nikki even came out too,said she has always liked me as Adrianna more and going to be there for support.So far I am excited about it and going to love the results.Next are my friends and other family members including my twin son and daughter tommorrow
    • AdriannaB
      Today was coming out more today and it was time.When I was 15,I questioned myself if I was really a woman from the inside and knew the answer was yes.So far good at work and even with my wife Nikki.My mom and 3 younger sisters,did take it good.I knew I wanted to go farther sometime later in my life.Did start seeing a therapist last month and decided to do this transition with no hormones,surgically.Even went to my first consultation today having a body contouring surgery,ffs and breast augmentation.Good news it's going to happen on March 2nd changing my life around in a good way.Nikki is going to be there for support,has always said she has liked me as Adrianna more.I turn 41 next month and want to see family and friends see me as male before I become Adrianna for good. 
    • Jani
      Greetings Mickey and welcome. That's nice that your wife understands happiness is most important.  Please join in.   Cheers, Jani
    • Charlize
      I was involved in an attempt to get a trans meeting going in New Hope PA a few years ago.  Unfortunately there were not enough folks in our area, and while some drove a long distance to attend at times it was only one or two of us too often. You are certainly in an area with a larger population and bigger trans community so hopefully that won't be a problem.    The TGAA meetings on Zoom are basically the same as any other meeting.  For a great many people it is the only place they can share about issues they face as trans folks.  we have a literature study program, a Big Book Study, a speaker discussion and a topic discussion meeting.    I have found that the Hazeldon publication "Glad Day", which is covering issues the GLBTQ community faces,  often brings on good discussions.   Hugs,   Charlize
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...