Name Crisis is WORSE!!!

[Damien Mcknight]

UGH!!! I still can’t settle on a name!!! I HAVE STARTED REFERRING TO MYSELF AS MY DEAD NAME IS HOW BAD IT IS!!! I CAN’T THINK OF A NAME FOR ME!!! It’s stressing me out a lot! Please help!!!

[tracy_j]

I think the only thing I can suggest is to relax, if you can, and just let it come. It is harder to think straight when heavily stressed, or at least it is with me. I find things come to me easier when relaxed.

 

Good luck on getting one sorted soon!

 

Tracy

[ShawnaLeigh]

On 11/29/2019 at 2:50 AM, tracy_j said:

I think the only thing I can suggest is to relax, if you can, and just let it come. It is harder to think straight when heavily stressed, or at least it is with me. I find things come to me easier when relaxed.

 

Good luck on getting one sorted soon!

 

Tracy

Good advice here.  

You can drive yourself crazy trying so hard to name yourself.  I was getting caught up in this a few weeks ago.  I had to have it "mean something" to my past, or life, or family, or who knows.  It was driving me crazy.

Finally it just happened one day.  It seems so simple and stupid to me that its basically my male name with an extra letter tacked on the end.  The middle intial of my birth middle name to be exact but then with the middle changed.   It felt right to me.  I said it over and over and over in my head.  Like I was trying on a new outfit I was not sure about and going back to the same outfit after trying on several others.  To me it has to be organic.  Just let it happen.  Your name will be what it is when it comes to you, you will know.  JMO

[Jackie C.]

Another point is that you don't have to settle for the first thing that comes to mind. While you're trying out names you can start with one thing... In my case Jackie (or Jacqueline if you're being formal) was what I picked out of the gate. I used it for... oh, about a year. It isn't a perfect fit, I named myself after a fictional character I admire. So I wore that for a while until I finally settled on Robyn. That was a perfect fit. Now it's my legal name. I kept Jackie though. She's important to me. My full, legal name is Robyn Jacqueline C. Bonus points for coming up with initials that sound good enough for a nickname. Assuming I ever finish the book I'm working on, my pen name might be R. J. 

 

Really, until you find the right one, or change it legally, you can happily try on names like hats until you find the one that's right for you. You might irritate your friends a little, but if they're really your friends they'll understand and let you off with some light teasing. They might even help you out with a nickname that fits you better than anything you would have come up with on your own.

 

Hugs!