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emily the wolf

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Even on my mother's birthday she still finds ways to try and hurt me... All day yesterday she kept calling me "my precious little boy" and making sure that u knew she said the word boy... I was so dyshoric last night I ended up crying myself to sleep... Then she woke me up at like 240am so that I could get her a drink... Just like normal I had to get her more soda or food... Because I have to do everything and anything for her... I have to wait on her hand and foot... Like why... Then when she talks about me or uses my pronouns... She makes sure she makes it loud so I hear from any where in the house...

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Sometimes I swear you are living in a Dickens novel. Seriously, your parents are just hateful. The up at 2:40 for soda and food is a little -what the heck-, to me. Is she disabled in some way? That doesn't make it better, I'm just trying to work out why she ... Well first why do you need soda and food at 2:40 in the morning? Go back to sleep. ... Then, you're an adult, you should be able to handle the walk to the fridge.

I'm going to be hung up on the soda thing for a while. It's making my brain do loops. Why would you even...? See? I can't let it go. It makes no sense.

 

Any closer to to the escape hatch sweetie? The more I hear about your home life, the more I want to drive down there and kidnap you and I just don't have the means to support a new puppy right now. Also my car is older than you are, we could end up stranded halfway. I've been to Ohio before, that would be awful.

That's not fair, the Toledo zoo was nice, and I've enjoyed some of your amusement parks. I'd still rather be home.

 

Close your eyes and think, "Happily Ever After." If you work at it, you'll make it. I have faith in you.

 

Hugs!

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  1. She is not disabled in any way. She is pregnant but it is also my step father who partakes in this event... They did it before she was pregnant so I can't even use that excuse... 
  2. I'm no where closer as when ever my aunt asks to take me and spend the night she says no... However if I do end up going me and her are going to go shopping and take about all of this stuff... As last time I got to talk to her we were in the middle of an amusement park sooooo ye
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Yeah, an amusement park isn't the best place to have a heart-to-heart. It might give you something to do while waiting in line, but you'd get looks from everybody else.

 

I keep repeating, "Some families are different," in my head. It's not helping. You might try being more direct with your aunt. Something like, "Hey, can we go somewhere and talk please?" You need to get out of there sweetie. This isn't good for you.

 

Hugs!

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Yeah... I've only tried to kill myself 4 times because of the house... But I don't know I will try if I can get a chance..

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40 minutes ago, emily the wolf said:

Yeah... I've only tried to kill myself 4 times because of the house... But I don't know I will try if I can get a chance..

 

Also not healthy. Let's try to get you into a situation where, "Times I've tried to kill myself lately," is a lower number. Preferably zero. This isn't a thing you want to get better at.

 

Please talk to your aunt. I prefer you alive. ?

 

Hugs sweetie. Remember we're always here for you.

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

Please talk to your aunt. I prefer you alive. ?

 

Hugs sweetie. Remember we're always here for you.

I second this.  You are to precious to not be on this earth with us.

JMO

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2 hours ago, emily the wolf said:

Yeah... I've only tried to kill myself 4 times because of the house... But I don't know I will try if I can get a chance..

Emily, you are loveable and worth more than all the gold in the world. You have a purpose here on earth. You have a story to tell... your story! And people want to know. They need to know.

 

We are here for you. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Nobody should ever have to go through what you are going through. But it is temporary. Life is worth living. Love does exist, and you will experience it eventually.

 

Belle ❤️

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39 minutes ago, emily the wolf said:

Soooo random question but what would happen if I were to take 25+ Tylenol?

 

Liver damage. Bad plan. That can keep you from taking T-blockers later.

 

Also, please don't.

 

Hugs sweetie. We really do love you. Encouraging words from Susan too (she wasn't specific). You're important to me, so you're important to her too.

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39 minutes ago, emily the wolf said:

Soooo random question but what would happen if I were to take 25+ Tylenol?

I'm sure you don't want to do something that will permanently disable you. Life would be even worse. Give yourself a chance.

 

Don't try something like this. It doesn't matter what it will do. It is not worth it. 

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37 minutes ago, emily the wolf said:

Welp... Ummmm I won't do it again ig.. it took the pain away soooooo yay

Did you just do it? You need to call 911 now!

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52 minutes ago, emily the wolf said:

It's not the first time tho but idk I guess I should..

 

Seriously dear, you should take care of your body. You only get one and, more importantly, if you damage it now you might be barred from transitioning later or, worst case, you end up disabled and stuck dependent on your parents forever. After all of that, you have a little sister to think about. What would she think?

 

In the meantime, call 911. Tell them what happened and please don't hurt yourself anymore, OK?

 

Hugs sweetie.

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1 hour ago, emily the wolf said:

Soooo random question but what would happen if I were to take 25+ Tylenol?

As said, liver damage.

Livers don't grow back when you kill them.

And a lot of pain. A lot of pain.

Don't do that.

It's simply injuring yourself in a way you will regret for the rest of your life.

Not to mention that having serious liver damage may disqualify you from HRT.

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I would also deeply appreciate it if you would check in once this situation is resolved. It would really help me sleep if I knew you were still with us.

 

Please be OK sweetie.

 

Hugs!

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50 minutes ago, Jackie C. said:

I would also deeply appreciate it if you would check in once this situation is resolved. It would really help me sleep if I knew you were still with us.

 

Please be OK sweetie.

 

Hugs!

Likewise

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1 hour ago, Belle said:

Likewise

Consider me yet a 3rd person who would like to know you're okay.

TA

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  • Admin

Emily, you've gotten some great advice here, and I completely agree that the first thing to do is call 9-1-1 if you haven't already done so.  Once you get medical treatment, if you can log in and give us an update, log into Chat if you have access to Discord, or the best thing is to talk with a psychologist or therapist IRL.  I hope your home situation gets better, and fast, because this can't go on the way it is.  You may also want to try and find a local LGBT center to find resources to help, perhaps even a place to stay temporarily where you'll be safe.  We care about you, Emily.  Please take care of yourself before you worry about what you're mother may need.  She's an adult and can take care of herself.

 

(((HUGS)))

 

Carolyn Marie

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Well I'm here now... I have been sick so I went to the doctor... Told them they told me not to do it again... But I am sick.. I have strep eek.. but ye.. might be going to the hospital cuz I have a fever of 103.7 and if it gets higher welllllll ye... Bad things sooo ima just rewatch all of the Harry Potter movies lol

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Glad to hear that you're safe, Emily, but sorry to hear that you're not well.  If that fever doesn't break reallly soon, take Aunt Carolyn's advice and get yourself to urgent care or the ER.  That high of a fever is not a good sign.  Take care.

 

Carolyn Marie

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9 hours ago, emily the wolf said:

Well I'm here now... I have been sick so I went to the doctor... Told them they told me not to do it again... But I am sick.. I have strep eek.. but ye.. might be going to the hospital cuz I have a fever of 103.7 and if it gets higher welllllll ye... Bad things sooo ima just rewatch all of the Harry Potter movies lol

 

OK, yeah strep sucks. Have a sit, get some rest (Harry Potter is a good plan, they put ME to sleep anymore) and take care of yourself. It's a girl's right to have a good pampering session when she doesn't feel well.

 

I'm glad you're OK sweetie, you scared the bejezus out of me last night. I didn't sleep well at all. Stupid maternal instincts. I didn't used to have those. ?

 

Be well and lose yourself in the wizardling world for a while. We'll be here when you get back.

 

Hugs!

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  • Posts

    • Sally Stone
      Post 6 “The Military Career Years” In 1977 I joined the Army and went to flight school to become a helicopter pilot.  To fly for the military had been a childhood dream and when the opportunity arose, I took advantage of it, despite knowing I would have to carefully control my crossdressing activity.  At the time, military aviation was male dominated and a haven for Type A personalities and excessive testosterone.  I had always been competitive but my personality was not typically Type A.  And while I could never be considered effeminate, I wasn’t overtly masculine either.  Consequently, I had little trouble hiding the part of my personality that leaned towards the feminine side.    However, serving in the Army limited my opportunities for feminine self-expression.  During this period, I learned that being unable to express my feminine nature regularly, led to frustration and unhappiness.  I managed these feelings by crossdressing and underdressing whenever I could.  Underdressing has never been very fulfilling for me, but while I was in the Army it was a coping mechanism.  I only cross-dressed in private and occasionally my wife would take me out for a late-night drive.  Those drives were still quite private, but being out of the house was clearly therapeutic.    I told myself I was coping, but when it became apparent the Army was going to be a career, the occasional and closeted feminine expression was clearly inadequate.  I needed more girl time and I wanted to share my feminine side with the rest of the world, so the frustration and unhappiness grew.  Despite my feelings regarding feminine self-expression, I loved flying, so I wasn’t willing to give up my military career.  Consequently, I resigned myself to the fact that the female half of my personality needed to take a back seat, and what helped me through, was dreaming of military retirement, and finally having the ability to let Sally blossom.   About Sally. 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    • Davie
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      Boyfriend and I went to a support group for spouses dating or married to a transgender person on Tuesday night for the first time.It was amazing meeting other couples like us.One was a genetic woman whom has been dating a transgender male for the first time and she is supporting his transition.Us,they were amazed by us agreeing on something we said,love and acceptance have brought us together
    • Abigail Genevieve
      By which I mean there is a cultural stereotype of what a man is, and one of what a woman is.  Even worse, of what a transgender person is.   You be you.   I read of a boy who thought he was a girl because he did not adhere to some (rather toxic) conceptions of what it means to be a man, so he decided he was a girl.  He was told he didn't have to conform to stereotype and got happy. "You mean I don't have to transition?" He didn't want to, and was relieved.   Once upon a time if you were transgender they told you either you transition or die.   Incorporate the best of what it means to be a man and the best of what it means to be a woman as much as you possibly can, and let the rest go.  Be fully human. Be alive. Don't conform to some cultural crud.
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