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Mary Jane

Why keep living?

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Mary Jane

I'm feeling very low right now I think depressed so I ask why keep living I still can't do it but I think it's slowly building to the point when I can seriously I know there's some good things in my life I have a house I have games I can play I can watch lots of things and I know I'll regret some things if I do I'll regret not seeing the sunshine anymore, not being with my family I'll is my future but I don't even see my future to be bright I mean like really I keep thinking next year then it's going to be great and it never happens for about 16 years now my life has been pretty much the same but it's been getting harder and harder for me to be happy I've even lost a part of me that was always pretty hopeful... at least it feels like I've lost it and except for my parents no one really thinks of me that I know of not the person I'm trying to be friends with at school not my cousins no one but I think of them maybe not all the time but I think of them so again why keep going? In this pretty broken world

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Susan R
1 hour ago, Markjvp said:

I'm feeling very low right now I think depressed so I ask why keep living

Because despite what you might think, people love you and you have great value to us here and others!

 

Just realize that the difficulty you are experiencing now is temporary.  It really is. Very few people who actually TRY HARD to work through their problems, have those problems very long.  And realize that we all have some problems...it’s a natural part of life.  These problems change but the few that don’t can be helped.  This low point will pass....eventually.

 

Sometimes when you can’t fix a problem right away then put your energies elsewhere.  I find the best thing to do when feeling down like this is to do something different...completely different.  Put yourself out there. Helping someone you know needs help, writing a letter to an old friend or journaling, telling someone how much they mean to you out of the blue with no expectations, taking a walk with someone and ask about THEM and their problems, spending the day with your pet somewhere you’ve never been.  These are a few out of dozens of things I can think of and I’m sure you can come up with many more then that that might help.  Just change things up and see how much better you feel.  It works for me so there’s a some chance it may help you too.

 

I wish you the best,

Susan R🌷

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TammyAnne

We would miss you dear! That would be a terrible loss for us old folks here trying to make sense of the world after a lifetime spent trying to cope with an unforgiving world. Stay with us, help us together muddle through this. Please.

TA

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Mary Jane

I'll try what you said Susan but I'm pretty limited in fact right now it's only playing or watching something it works but not always and not always right away. And are you sure I'll be missed @TammyAnne?

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Mary Jane

Also I don't know what's holding me back from killing my self but I'm glad it's there because I probably would have already done it if it wasn't but I think it's slowly failing

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Alex C

hey Markjvf ..yeah I get where yr coming from...I think its the meds, the loneness and uncertainty of our decisions. I never tried Susan approach, but she might be on to something. I just know when I feel like its the end, I drink and fall asleep and when I awake I gather as much of the strength as I can muster start the day over again done that for the last 3yrs. I do the same thing now but I no longer drink as much. good luck keep fighting

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Mary Jane

Thank you and I'm going to try to keep that in mind the keep fighting I keep telling myself there's things that's like a battle and I just realized I stopped fighting from time to time

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Alex C

yeah its tough when that creeps in, " the stop fighten." Because, you know in yr heats of hearts you want to fight to make everything all right..but life sucks sometimes...Good news you live in a Trump free zone so has to help a little bit right

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Mary Jane

I don't really know if it helps because I don't know how trump is all I know of him is he want to build a wall because of something

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MetaLicious
2 hours ago, Markjvp said:

I don't really know if it helps because I don't know how trump is all I know of him is he want to build a wall because of something

Yes, Mark, that sums up Trump well - he wants something because of something...  He's a gasbag whose main reason for existence is spouting hot air.  I will say no more, because I don't live in a Trump-free zone, and I have no wish to be banned for saying what I think of him.

 

As for you - you are important! To yourself, and to many on this board.  You are quite likely important to many in your life, but I'm not living your life, so I cannot speak to it.  I will say this, from 50+ years of experience: emotions are but clouds passing in the sky.  Today, you may feel down.  It will pass.  Tomorrow, you may feel elated.  It, too, will pass.  The longer you live, the easier it is to see the transience of everything. Nothing is permanent.  No situation, no feeling, not a single iota of our existence is carved in stone.  It may seem trite to say, "Hang in there!", but there is truth behind those trite words.  If you can just hang on, for one day, the next may be the one to bring change. And if it does not, hang on for just one day more to see what the next day brings.

 

Day after day, one day at a time, most of humanity is struggling to hang on for just one more day.  And you know what?  That's okay.  Because sometimes making it through today is more important than all the pptential future in front of us.  Because none of that future has any potential if we don't make it through today.

 

So, please, Mark, hang in there.  Just for one more day...

 

Peace, love, and happiness.

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TammyAnne
3 hours ago, Markjvp said:

I'll try what you said Susan but I'm pretty limited in fact right now it's only playing or watching something it works but not always and not always right away. And are you sure I'll be missed @TammyAnne?

Absolutely. How could you doubt it?

All us old folks need you to carry on.

TA

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Mary Jane
1 hour ago, MetaLicious said:

As for you - you are important! To yourself, and to many on this board.  You are quite likely important to many in your life, but I'm not living your life, so I cannot speak to it.  I will say this, from 50+ years of experience: emotions are but clouds passing in the sky.  Today, you may feel down.  It will pass.  Tomorrow, you may feel elated.  It, too, will pass.  The longer you live, the easier it is to see the transience of everything. Nothing is permanent.  No situation, no feeling, not a single iota of our existence is carved in stone.  It may seem trite to say, "Hang in there!", but there is truth behind those trite words.  If you can just hang on, for one day, the next may be the one to bring change. And if it does not, hang on for just one day more to see what the next day brings.

 

Day after day, one day at a time, most of humanity is struggling to hang on for just one more day.  And you know what?  That's okay.  Because sometimes making it through today is more important than all the pptential future in front of us.  Because none of that future has any potential if we don't make it through today.

 

So, please, Mark, hang in there.  Just for one more day...

 

Peace, love, and happiness.

Actually in my life right now if online isn’t included well I know my parents care but does any of my cousins or other people part of my family? Maybe but I don’t feel it

 

and I’ve heard that cloud thing before that were the observer not the cloud so it will pass but even then there can be some things that’s permanent or even seem permanent I’m trying to still hang on but as I said there’s things that’s like a battle for me and well I’m trying to keep fighting but it’s growing harder especially with not much help 

1 hour ago, TammyAnne said:

All us old folks need you to carry on.

TA

I’m still trying but again it’s getting harder and harder for me i don’t know what or why but it might be because I keep too many bad things that happen in, maybe keeping some in is good but keeping too much in is definitely bad it’s like if you try to keep rage in it’s going to build up and eventually all that pressure is going to come out, but I know it’s not just that because no matter what I’ve tried life keeps dragging me down somehow 

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Sarahnr1

Its  pretty obvius  to me that you are in a  DEEP  Depression dear and  as shuch you need to get  profetinal help ASAP . And if you are on any medicines  you defenetly need to contact  youre doc   so that they can check if  you need to change meds or  doces  

 

And  if  you havent  you might want to get evaluation for possible Depression  & or Bipolar disorder. (i have both so i know the signs )           

 

As to why living  ? Well  first of all as i understood  it  you seems  young  so you have  most of youre life ahead  of  you  and  NOONE  can predict there own future  Mark  (like you i had  a  very  bad start  in life  actually from the day i was  born )   and i had to fight against  terrible odds and still have too  and most probaly have too until i finaly get to take my permanent NATURAL  causes  rest .  BUT  as you see  im STILL here   fighting  for  my life   and trying  to do the best with what i got to work with   EVERY day. Life is  what you make of  it  Mark.

 

And  noone said  life would  be easy   sadly   for some   its  a tedios  battle  and  for others  its  breeze BUT  either way   we HAVE to keep trying   Mark we CANT just give upp                     

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Mary Jane

actually i think i dont have both because even when im super low it can disappear and ive never had mood swing before (if thats what bipolar disorder is) but i have suspected that i have depression because from time to time basically if im not distracted enough and if i start thinking negative things i will get sad maybe feel low 

 

i know you probably understand how im feeling but i keep fighting and every year is kind of like a cycle at this point school gets harder i most likely pass the courses that i take and at home i just watch or play then at the weekends we go somewhere because we need to buy something but also each year i go through something like this at least once when im feeling super low and at least once in the year im so sad that im thinking of... you know... suicide. so we cant just give up? how my life is pretty much a cycle right now a loop theres things added to it like this site but i just dont want to keep living like this im like a wild animal being put in a cage but was fighting before but now giving in or I AM in the cage slowly giving up and i can probably describe my life a couple more ways. ive always wanted to be free and ive always been someone who tries there best at everything but whats the point of moving forward when i almost have no help i know "keep fighting" but again its getting harder and harder and i know the people here can only help so much but not as much as you being here physically for me...

 

i still cant kill my self not yet and ill probably keep doing what im doing even while sad but why keep living. yes i probably should get professional help but how are they going to help because i can most likely counter what they say "there's people that love me" that's just probably my mom and dad and i cant feel the love from my other parts of my family i dont know what else someone might say but thats how i can counter that. also im not taking any medications right now

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Mary Jane

i know this cycle will continue for now at least while im in school and im expecting university to be super hard so why keep living? but again i cant kill myself... not yet and i know things im throwing away if i do it

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Aidan5

My advice is basically just the retelling of everyone's wonderful and thoughtful comments. You have your life ahead of you and I know what it's like to be in that dark place, I was there just 2 weeks ago I think but something small made it all turn around and made me want to keep fighting. I had given up then and there I wouldn't be here where I stand today, that I am grateful for. Please hang on bud. This is anxiety, the fear of the unknown, but give it a little thought, university may be super cool and fun! Just give it a chance. When I was a freshman in high school I was terrified, and even now I am going to be moving schools so late in the school year. I will make the most of it and enjoy what life has brought me, you should try to do the same, friend :))  

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Sarahnr1
39 minutes ago, Markjvp said:

actually i think i dont have both because even when im super low it can disappear and ive never had mood swing before (if thats what bipolar disorder is) but i have suspected that i have depression because from time to time basically if im not distracted enough and if i start thinking negative things i will get sad maybe feel low 

 

i know you probably understand how im feeling but i keep fighting and every year is kind of like a cycle at this point school gets harder i most likely pass the courses that i take and at home i just watch or play then at the weekends we go somewhere because we need to buy something but also each year i go through something like this at least once when im feeling super low and at least once in the year im so sad that im thinking of... you know... suicide. so we cant just give up?

 

how my life is pretty much a cycle right now a loop theres things added to it like this site but i just dont want to keep living like this im like a wild animal being put in a cage but was fighting before but now giving in or I AM in the cage slowly giving up and i can probably describe my life a couple more ways. ive always wanted to be free and ive always been someone who tries there best at everything but whats the point of moving forward when i almost have no help i know "keep fighting" but again its getting harder and harder and i know the people here can only help so much but not as much as you being here physically for me...

 

i still cant kill my self not yet and ill probably keep doing what im doing even while sad but why keep living.

 

yes i probably should get professional help but how are they going to help because i can most likely counter what they say "there's people that love me" that's just probably my mom and dad and i cant feel the love from my other parts of my family i dont know what else someone might say but thats how i can counter that. also im not taking any medications right now

 

Bipolar  is  whats  formely was  known as manic depression   and  what it does  is actually as you describe  you have  youre UP  perids  were lifes  is  all good  and then  you have youre DOWN  periods .and its not  uncommon to have both  Depression as well as  Bipolar   BUT only a cert  doc can make that diagnose  tho

 

Belive me i understand  better then you might  think Mark . and  i also understand  the  demands on you   are getting  higher  as  you grow  older .   NO Mark  we cant  im a living example  that you CAN  make it thru this rogh times    

 

Again i understand  you Mark  and i know you whant  belive me  BUT  as the time  goes  by  and you manage to get thru this  rogh periods  youre  mental strainth   will also increase   and you will be  stronger then you were before  (how do you think im still around  with my crappy life  ?  )  I agree  mark and thats  WHY  you need to go and A   get  help for youre depression  and B  try to not   ask to much of youre self   (ie  LOWER youre own expectetaions on youre self  and accept  you can only do youre best)    C   GET youre self  OUT there   and look around  Mark   if youre not happy being a lone wolf  then you need to get out and  look  they arent  going to just stand  by youre door  and say hey !   ya know    

 

Mark  when you have youre  Pm privigies  pm me  ANY time you whant  or need and we can talk about  whatever you want.Thats  just the depression talking   DONT listen to it   if i would have listend to all the crap coming at me  24 / 7   i would  have  left  this earth a long  time  ago  

 

Mark  i have been talking to this so called  pro`s   since i was 4  and up to adult (now close to 50 )   age  and  you'd  be surprised to see  how  much that have  improved from my time  to now. (back in mu days they dident  know  diddly about any of my diagnosis  or problems BUT these days  they have learnt  plenty  . and the  only way you will find  out  if or how they gonna help you is  give them a chance   (wink)  +  when youre this far  down  you NEED  profetinal help TRUST me on this . (and like  in life in general theres  good as well as bad   so cold  profetinals  and if you feel one isent  working  ask for another one )  And last  its  not  they will help you  its  YOU and  with the  guidance of   them will together  find a solution.  And  also im not on any meds  either   for any of my diagnosis  so thats NO requirement.                

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Sarahnr1
40 minutes ago, Aidan5 said:

My advice is basically just the retelling of everyone's wonderful and thoughtful comments. You have your life ahead of you and I know what it's like to be in that dark place, I was there just 2 weeks ago I think but something small made it all turn around and made me want to keep fighting. I had given up then and there I wouldn't be here where I stand today, that I am grateful for. Please hang on bud. This is anxiety, the fear of the unknown, but give it a little thought, university may be super cool and fun! Just give it a chance. When I was a freshman in high school I was terrified, and even now I am going to be moving schools so late in the school year. I will make the most of it and enjoy what life has brought me, you should try to do the same, friend :))  

 

WELL spoken Aidan (standing up and aplloud)   and im happy to read youre  doing  better again.  and reg anxiety  yes i hadent thoght of that Aidan but its also closely related to depression  actually  (and yes Severe on that one as well (sigh )       

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A. Dillon

What I have noticed is that when you are in that in between, of not really wanting to be here but also not being able to let go, it can be incredibly stressful. You don't really want to talk to an adult about it, you are confident that you won't do anything so you don't want to alarm them and just add more stress. However, you do need to talk to someone, so you down play it and they give you some basic advice. You know that it doesn't help, so you get frustrated, but you know it is not their fault so you move on. You are in this middle ground, you don't see things getting better but things are not bad enough for someone to intervene, so you feel it would be better to just give up and leave. However, that does not fix anything. All thinking like that does is get you more stuck in the cycle, more afraid to try and get help. I try to coexist with all of it and slowly improve on the down low, and eventually find myself ok.

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Sarahnr1
45 minutes ago, A. Dillon said:

What I have noticed is that when you are in that in between, of not really wanting to be here but also not being able to let go, it can be incredibly stressful. You don't really want to talk to an adult about it, you are confident that you won't do anything so you don't want to alarm them and just add more stress. However, you do need to talk to someone, so you down play it and they give you some basic advice. You know that it doesn't help, so you get frustrated, but you know it is not their fault so you move on. You are in this middle ground, you don't see things getting better but things are not bad enough for someone to intervene, so you feel it would be better to just give up and leave. However, that does not fix anything. All thinking like that does is get you more stuck in the cycle, more afraid to try and get help. I try to coexist with all of it and slowly improve on the down low, and eventually find myself ok.

 

i couldent agree more A Dillon  its obvius you know what youre talking about  as well so WELL spoken indeed  (standing up and aplloud  ) 

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Mary Jane
1 hour ago, Sarahnr1 said:

 

Bipolar  is  whats  formely was  known as manic depression   and  what it does  is actually as you describe  you have  youre UP  perids  were lifes  is  all good  and then  you have youre DOWN  periods .and its not  uncommon to have both  Depression as well as  Bipolar   BUT only a cert  doc can make that diagnose  tho

 

Belive me i understand  better then you might  think Mark . and  i also understand  the  demands on you   are getting  higher  as  you grow  older .   NO Mark  we cant  im a living example  that you CAN  make it thru this rogh times    

 

Again i understand  you Mark  and i know you whant  belive me  BUT  as the time  goes  by  and you manage to get thru this  rogh periods  youre  mental strainth   will also increase   and you will be  stronger then you were before  (how do you think im still around  with my crappy life  ?  )  I agree  mark and thats  WHY  you need to go and A   get  help for youre depression  and B  try to not   ask to much of youre self   (ie  LOWER youre own expectetaions on youre self  and accept  you can only do youre best)    C   GET youre self  OUT there   and look around  Mark   if youre not happy being a lone wolf  then you need to get out and  look  they arent  going to just stand  by youre door  and say hey !   ya know    

 

Mark  when you have youre  Pm privigies  pm me  ANY time you whant  or need and we can talk about  whatever you want.Thats  just the depression talking   DONT listen to it   if i would have listend to all the crap coming at me  24 / 7   i would  have  left  this earth a long  time  ago  

 

Mark  i have been talking to this so called  pro`s   since i was 4  and up to adult (now close to 50 )   age  and  you'd  be surprised to see  how  much that have  improved from my time  to now. (back in mu days they dident  know  diddly about any of my diagnosis  or problems BUT these days  they have learnt  plenty  . and the  only way you will find  out  if or how they gonna help you is  give them a chance   (wink)  +  when youre this far  down  you NEED  profetinal help TRUST me on this . (and like  in life in general theres  good as well as bad   so cold  profetinals  and if you feel one isent  working  ask for another one )  And last  its  not  they will help you  its  YOU and  with the  guidance of   them will together  find a solution.  And  also im not on any meds  either   for any of my diagnosis  so thats NO requirement.                

On the bipolar one it could also not be bipolar disorder because everyone had ups and downs it can be instant or not instant you can have a good day then bad I know because it’s happened to me again and again as in I’ll have a good day maybe it’s a relaxing day then the next I’m bored or the day isn’t as good as the one before it happens and I’ll try to talk to someone, like a guidance counselor here at school but problem is unless it’s online I’m shy I guess scared somehow but even then if someone I don’t know is saying something and let’s say it’s about me I can talk to them

 

40 minutes ago, A. Dillon said:

What I have noticed is that when you are in that in between, of not really wanting to be here but also not being able to let go, it can be incredibly stressful. You don't really want to talk to an adult about it, you are confident that you won't do anything so you don't want to alarm them and just add more stress. However, you do need to talk to someone, so you down play it and they give you some basic advice. You know that it doesn't help, so you get frustrated, but you know it is not their fault so you move on. You are in this middle ground, you don't see things getting better but things are not bad enough for someone to intervene, so you feel it would be better to just give up and leave. However, that does not fix anything. All thinking like that does is get you more stuck in the cycle, more afraid to try and get help. I try to coexist with all of it and slowly improve on the down low, and eventually find myself ok.

Actually I do want help but again I’m shy but not really online but I i might show something to someone I trust here at my school and I don’t feel like giving up and leaving but there really is a cycle I’ve noticed in my life and every year it’s pretty much what I described earlier

 

last thing sometimes all something needs time I’m feeling better now than a few hours ago pretty close to not sad but calm again and as a be said before games has a way of helping me so I’m going to download a new game I got and play it

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Kyler R.

I understand what you are saying very much. I have questioned this many times why keep living. I often really don't actually want to commit suicide. I just don't feel like anyone really wants me. But it gets better at some points. And you keep learning to get stronger. That's the part that is very true, as life gets harder, you get stronger. It has been that way for me throughout my (short) life. And everyone has downs, I get down and then come back up again. I understand you not really having friends or people that care about you other than your family. I have some online friends (here and other places) and it made me feel I mattered more. 

 

I also understand exactly what you mean about wanting help but being shy. I don't know that I appear on here as shy and anxious but in real life I very much am. 

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Sarahnr1
35 minutes ago, Markjvp said:

On the bipolar one it could also not be bipolar disorder because everyone had ups and downs it can be instant or not instant you can have a good day then bad I know because it’s happened to me again and again as in I’ll have a good day maybe it’s a relaxing day then the next I’m bored or the day isn’t as good as the one before it happens and I’ll try to talk to someone, like a guidance counselor here at school but problem is unless it’s online I’m shy I guess scared somehow but even then if someone I don’t know is saying something and let’s say it’s about me I can talk to them

 

last thing sometimes all something needs time I’m feeling better now than a few hours ago pretty close to not sad but calm again and as a be said before games has a way of helping me so I’m going to download a new game I got and play it

 

Corect BUT with Bipolar is like you describe it goes  up and down Mark , And as i also said  ONLY a cert   doctor can make that or any diagnose. I understand  Mark for many its  very  hard to reaveal there  problems  or intimate  feelings   to someone else   thats  natural   BUT  if you give youre self the time  and  youre counselor you built up confidence and above all trust  to eatchoder .This is not quick fix  my friend  its gonna  have to take the time  it needs  to.

 

The  secret to this is  you have now  been able  to " ventilate "    (same as you do with the  shrinks  and other  profetinals and thats what you need Mark. And im happy you feel better and have  loads of fun with the  new game           

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Sarahnr1
36 minutes ago, Kyler R. said:

I understand what you are saying very much. I have questioned this many times why keep living. I often really don't actually want to commit suicide. I just don't feel like anyone really wants me. But it gets better at some points. And you keep learning to get stronger. That's the part that is very true, as life gets harder, you get stronger. It has been that way for me throughout my (short) life. And everyone has downs, I get down and then come back up again. I understand you not really having friends or people that care about you other than your family. I have some online friends (here and other places) and it made me feel I mattered more. 

 

I also understand exactly what you mean about wanting help but being shy. I don't know that I appear on here as shy and anxious but in real life I very much am. 

 

If only my generation &  the generations  before me would have been as strong mentaly and  Knowledgeable as  so many of you have shown in this thread  we would  be so mush better of then  many of us are  today.   im highly impressed  .    

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Mary Jane

I think I’m ok now after that game of volleyball we just played in gym class and thank you 😊 to all of you

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      Love this answer. Best reply of the day...so on point!  Thanks Jackie!   @Wes..its always ok to vent here...we love reading about your good times and bad....we don’t discriminate.   Susan R🌷
    • Susan R
      Sometimes humor is the best way to deal with frustration.  I have no articles specifically dealing with this issue but only my humble advice.  I would be sitting her down and seriously make the effort to reason with her.  Make an event of it away from kids, TV, music, etc..so she knows this is a big deal and something needs to change.  I think it would be important to keep all other issues out of the conversation and in a nice way explain to her why and how much this means to you.  You might ask her what you need to do to help make this happen...don’t expect a quick response.  Let her know how much this hurts when she calls you you’re birth name when you’re presenting as Shawna.  If that doesn’t work, there’s likely not going to be any resolution any time soon.  Communicating your needs in a polite, logical and calm manner usually works with reasonable individuals who are not vindictive or petty.  Let’s hope your wife is neither.   Susan R🌷
    • Emily michelle
      I’m glad you were able to come out to your wife and that she is supportive. That’s a huge weight of off your shoulders. When o came out to my wife she acted like things make sense now. I was the one who was an absolute wreck I cried for several days when I broke down, and so far she is my biggest ally. On the other hand when I told my sister she flat looked at me and said are you serious and that’s when I lost it again. She has come around a little bit but I still don’t think she understands.
    • Susan R
      @ShawnaLeigh This guy understood you meant business and he is in the past now.  Part of me feels proud of you for sticking up for yourself.  That being said..this stuff happens everyday and you don’t want to put yourself in that situation again ever.  Most of these online idiots are cowards and won’t actually go any further.  Realistically though, this might not be the case if it happens again.  You never want to have to do to ANYONE what you ‘inferred’ you’d do to him...no matter how justified you are.  It would immediately change your life in many detrimental ways for the foreseeable future.   My 2¢, Susan R🌷
    • Emily michelle
      Oh wow that’s a long wait since November I don’t think I would be able to hold it together that long. Is the endo just that busy or what was the hold up? If you don’t mind me asking 
    • TammyAnne
      Venting is good for you, Wes. We all do it. It beats standing on the street corner screaming at the cars! (Unless you just like being arrested!) TA
    • Jackie C.
      I'm sorry you had such a lousy, rotten, no good day @ShawnaLeigh!   Susan and I do what we can but... I'm helpless at household repair stuff. I can troubleshoot electronics and that's about it. She's actually more capable in a lot of areas than I am. I mostly just know who to call for help.   I'm not going to last long when civilization finally cracks, am I?   Hugs!
    • TammyAnne
      That's where I'm at (waiting) too courtesy of the plague. I'm told all my papers are in a file waiting to go forward to the endo. But I'm going to beg to get it pushed forward ASAP at my next appointment since this was supposed to start back in November. TA
    • TammyAnne
      Due to medical things being on hold for a while, I will not get to start HRT until I'm 70. Is it too late? Too late for what? I wish I could have started fifty years ago, but the times were quite different and this was unthinkable course of action at that time. I will never look like a nineteen year old college girl, I know that, but I can be me to the best of my ability. It is better to plow forward even if it's late than to finish my life in regret. TA
    • Susan R
      Wise words from a wise woman.  Yes, this is the case in our household too.  Apparently, I forgot to negotiate this change in household roles when coming out....too late now.  Sure, it’d be nice for my wife to do more of my traditional male duties around the house but I realize it’s not practical at our ages. I do those things easier, faster and usually do them correctly the first time...lol   I feel for you...especially these day with no salon to fix you up in a snap.  We’ve all been there...keep your head up, hon! My Best, Susan R🌷    
    • Susan R
      Welcome KM, what an incredible story of coming to terms with yourself and sharing it with your wife. You did the right thing for your mental well-being.  There comes a time when you can’t just pack it away any longer.  The freedom you describe is so memorable to me.  It’s like a 200lb weight had been lifted off you.  I know your still feeling some of that relief 5 days after the fact.   What you say above is THE recipe to navigate through this successfully. I did this same thing with my wife and it has brought us closer together than ever before.  Like you, I gave my wife the keys and trusted she would open a door whenever I needed more.  It’s been over a year and all the doors are unlocked and life is good.   What an inspiration this is. I’m very happy for you and your wife.  Please keep us updated as to your progress.  It’s still very early but I’m confident you’re going to experience a positive outcome. I was so impressed I had to share your story with my wife.  I said to her, “Doesn’t this sound familiar? She read it and smiled!   Best of luck to the both of you on your new path. Warmest Regards, Susan R🌷
    • ShawnaLeigh
      Wow super job and such a wonderful start!  I’m am so jealous.  My coming out to my wife was a drama cry fest that took me three days to get the bare bones out.  We are getting a divorce on friendly term though.   your wife is an amazing and strong women.   Welcome to TP also if I had not said so yet.  
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