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Pallas

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Hello everyone :)

 

I have recently began to question myself - yet again - on what I am.  I plan to figure it out once and for all, because it bugs me this question keeps popping up. 

I started to look up online how to figure this out and came across this site. 

 

So hello again! 

 

Hope you are all doing well and see you around. 

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  • Forum Moderator

Welcome, Pallas!  This is a great place to explore your identity.  There are lots of supportive people, many of whom have been through the same things that you are going through.  Read posts, ask questions, rant if necessary.

 

It took me a long time, but I finally figured out that when the same question kept popping up, it was telling me that I had the wrong answer.

 

Regards,

Kathy

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@KathyLauren  Thank you for the welcome!
I figured as such ;)  
 

May I ask, if this isn't too personal, what was the question for you and what was your answer?
And how did you figure it out?

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1 hour ago, Pallas said:

@KathyLauren  Thank you for the welcome!
I figured as such ;)  
 

May I ask, if this isn't too personal, what was the question for you and what was your answer?
And how did you figure it out?

 

The question was, "Am I really trans?"  I kept answering "No way!!!!" for years, but the question just kept coming up.  When I finally answered "Yeah, I think I am," the question went away and never came up again.  Yes, I am.

 

"Figuring it out", for me, was more a case of stopping denying it.  The evidence over the years was just too overwhelming to deny any longer.  I was 61 when it all finally clicked for me.  I don't recommend leaving it that long!

 

Regards,

Kathy

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@KathyLauren Wow, congrats!  Even if it took that long, I'm glad you found out. I hope you have been a lot happer since then! :)

If I may ask, did you get any treatment or counselling at any point in time for it?

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Welcome Pallas.  

I questioned my both my gender identity and my strength to live as myself.

I found support here especially because i knew i wasn't alone.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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@Charlize Thank you, and nice to meet you too :) 
 

I'm sorry to hear, it seemed like you had it really rough. I hope things are better for you now?

*hugs back*

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Hi Pallas, I'm pretty new here myself and have found this place to be a very welcoming and understanding environment.

 

For me, I was always questioning everything about myself. Even though I have a successful career, an apparently loving extended family and a great network of friends, I was always uncomfortable in my skin and unhappy with myself. So I guess the question for myself was, why don't I feel like an authentic person? Why do I feel so fake? The answer hit me in January, that I was play-acting as a man. Apparently I was pretty good at it because I had everyone fooled, even myself. 

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1 hour ago, Pallas said:

How did you finally figure it out, though, if I may ask?

 

I wish I could say that there was some kind of process or method that you or anyone else could emulate, but honestly it just hit me as I was driving in my car. It was like a lightning bolt from the blue.

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I guess I'll have to drive more!
Sorry, just kidding. Like I said, I'm glad you figured it out, in whatever way that may have been.


I wish you well with your new life!

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Welcome. I hope this forum will help you finding the answer. I know it took me months of researches before even starting to get an answer. The only advice I can give you is to not rush yourself.

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@Willowtry  Thank you for the welcome :) 
I hope so too. I will try not to rush myself, although it is starting to become very exiciting to figure it out!
 

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6 hours ago, Pallas said:

@KathyLauren Wow, congrats!  Even if it took that long, I'm glad you found out. I hope you have been a lot happer since then! :)

If I may ask, did you get any treatment or counselling at any point in time for it?

 

In my forties, I knew something was up, because I was still single.  I saw a counsellor and eventually joined a men's (!) group.  It actually did a lot of good for me.  However, the subject of being trans never came up, even though I was underdressing the whole time.  Like I said, serious denial.

 

After I realized I was trans, about 20 years later, I saw a couple of therapists for my hormone and surgery letters.

 

Regards,

Kathy

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Hi @Pallas, welcome to transgenderpulse. 

 

I still haven't completely figured out what I am. I've thought I was a whole bunch of different identities. I've come to the decision that for now non-binary is the most comfortable. I first realized I wasn't trans after reading about transgender people in a couple book and how much I related to it. 

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35 minutes ago, Pallas said:

@Kyler R.
Ok, so to a degree you have figured it out? 

It's been a long battle of I think this is me and then no that's not it. I've decided non-binary works for me at this moment, so I guess that would be a yes. Maybe one day I'll be sure of exactly what I identify as. 

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