Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Partially out but wanting to start HRT


Patrice

Recommended Posts

So, i would like to say something about coming out to your partner and customers.  For me, transition is all about being honest and authentic.  I lived a lie in trying to make the world believe i was male.  I don't like living a lie.  Coming to terms with the fact i am a trans woman was a relief more than anything.  I came out to select family members and friends first and just two days ago to the rest of the world, via a facebook post.

 

Keep in mind, you don't have to just drop it in people's laps either.  You can do things to warm them to the idea.  I told people i was struggling with gender dysphoria for about 6 months while i learned what i needed to in order to make the commitment to transition.  In doing so i readied them for my announcement if and when it came.  I lost only 3 facebook friends, and to be honest i can't tell you who they were.  You can mention you're seeing a therapist (i do hope you have one).  There are lots of ways to kind of spread the word ahead of coming out, and in doing so help people understand that you didn't just wake up one day and decide you wanted to be a girl.

 

Girl, my advice is don't live a lie.  The authentic and real you is going to be so much better for it in the long term.  Yeah, the reality is you're probably going to lose some friends and loved ones.  We all do.  You will be very blessed if you don't.  Still, being honest and authentic is one of the most valuable things you can do.  If you lose customers, others will replace them.  Your business partner will adapt.

 

Totally glad you shared your story.

Link to comment

Thanks Michelle,

Congrats on coming out! I'm getting there. Your advice is sound as well. I fully agree. I've always been a very honest person and I'm mature enough to know who I am and I plan on being me :)

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Patrice, Welcome to our own little world. Were no one judges you, and you can be who you truly are.

I am so happy for you that your family is accepting. In mine, only my middle son and wife accept it. I came out to my oldest almost 4 weeks ago. Apr 30. He is still mad at me for being truthful. I haven't talked to him since. His wife is the same. Hard to say, but I have all but wrote them out of my life.

My youngest is hard to read but I don't think he likes it. Then there is my wife of 35 years. She totally doesn't accept it. Oh, she will let me transition but she will not be married to me. She married "a man".

Do to health history the VA will not put me on HRT. I am on puberty blockers. last T level check was 21.

With all my negative acceptance in my life. If given the chance I would go on HRT in a heartbeat. I know that I will be single soon. While it hurts to the soul. I have a right to be happy and be who I need to be.

 

Of topic, everyone is welcome to join in the daily. Thread, Good Morning, Coffee is on. to talk about just about anything happening in your world. Even learn about the other crazies on here.

 

 

Hugs, Kymmie

Link to comment
On 5/19/2020 at 10:24 AM, michelle_kitten said:

The authentic and real you is going to be so much better for it in the long term.

That's a great personal experience to pass along, Michelle.  Thank you❣️
@Patrice  @KymmieL.. I'm getting there too.  Albeit at a snails pace ? but she's going in the right direction

hugs❤️

 

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...
  • Forum Moderator
2 hours ago, Patrice said:

Started HRT yesterday!!! 

Congrats Patrice! This is wonderful news! I’m sure you’re on cloud nine right now. I still remember the time and place I took my first dose...like it was yesterday. I hope you will experience the best results. Just a little patience is needed as it does take some time as you know. Before long, you’ll notice a few minor changes and then without notice a whole lot of things will change for you. I hope you’ll report back to us all your good news. I just really enjoy reading about the accounts of others regarding their changes and how it has positively affected and improved their life.  Thanks for sharing with us your HUGE milestone.

 

My Best,

Susan R?

Link to comment

Congratulations, Patrice!  Happy for you❣️  hope you can keep us up to date on how its going for you.

Link to comment

Thanks :)

I'm pretty excited...and nervous..but mostly excited. I feel like when I was a kid the night before a track race.

Link to comment
  • 4 weeks later...

So, been on testosterone blockers and estrogen pills for a month now. TMI....Morning...random...you know what I mean...stopped after only 2 weeks. Is this ok to talk about?

I'm not particularily bothered that my instant response to excitement isn't resonating from one place... but my partner is used to my 'readiness' I had in intimate times before HRT. This could be tricky...on the other hand, other sensations are amazing...TMI...Is this ok to talk about?

Physically otherwise I haven't noticed or felt anything really. 

Emotionally, I have found myself a little more sensitive than usual. I'm not an actor but I think I could cry on demand right now. I haven't cried but definately could have if I allowed it.

Spiritually, totally torn. I'm really excited to let Patrice have her time in the sun but being Pat was always so easy. I haven't had a hard go being liked or included as a male so it makes me really nervous giving Patrice some space to move around. (I'm doing a Hulk/Bruce Banner kind of comparison). People are also really surprised when I tell them, I guess I hid well. My partner hopes she will be fine with it but said the other day that she doen't know if she will be ok with us both presenting as female full time. I thought she was on board, and so did she, but now it's less certain. I can deal with everyone else if I have a sense that my home life will be ok but the uncertainness has put a cloud over me at the moment. On one hand I know that surpressing everything and being male Pat all the time will make me unhappy but I don't want to loose what I have either. It's got me thinking about two spirits. I haven't allowed my feminine side enough time out to know if she needs to be full time or not. Or am I debating this becuase I fear rejection if I allow myself to present as female. Acceptance and appearance of confidence (sometimes valid other times faked) are hard to give up. What if I change my mind after? What will they think of me then? I was so certain  month ago. My past few sentences are flip flops but it's definately how I'm feeling. Awe shucks.

 

Link to comment
4 hours ago, Patrice said:

I haven't cried but definately could have if I allowed it.

Just let it go, Patrice ... holding it in is what he are forced to do a cis-males.  Its a burden society puts on us ... unburden yourself.

I have no HRT experience, but I am sure you will get some great feedback from others here to help you.  Your fears are very similar to what I fear for when the time comes to start.  So, I am in your corner.  Its just Round 1.  Come out fighting❣️  Hugs❤️

Link to comment

Thanks KayC,

It's really easy to focus on fear then the positive changes which are to come. 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

OK, so first off... two weeks isn't really a drop in the bucket. You might not see physical changes for six months. Mental changes happen quicker. I really started to notice around the second month. I think part of that is that we allow ourselves to be more in tune with our feminine side and let the male conditioning drop away. Like my endocrinologist told me; it takes about two months for your hormones to settle into the new normal. Then there's more blood work until they get the dosage right.

On that note, I had no issue with "male performance" right up until about eighteen months when I had my GCS. Total non-issue for me, though I understand others have had trouble.

 

Secondly, don't feel pressured to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. If you don't want the HRT, then don't take the HRT. Do what makes you comfortable in your own skin. That's the whole point. If that's crossdressing on weekends, then do that. We need to find our own paths. What's right for one person might not be right for another. Never let yourself feel pressured into doing something you're not sure about because it's "the right thing" to do.

 

Hugs!

Link to comment

Thanks Jackie,

I think I'm just a bit stressed out. Work is super busy again and I've reached the point where I've came out to all the people I knew would be okay with it and now it's time to start telling people that might not be. I'm letting my anxiety get the best of me. Overall I've been super excited to start HRT. 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 153 Guests (See full list)

    • Davie
    • Willow
    • MomTGDaughter
    • Karen Carey
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,024
    • Most Online
      8,356

    JamesyGreen
    Newest Member
    JamesyGreen
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alscully
      Alscully
      (35 years old)
    2. floruisse
      floruisse
      (40 years old)
    3. Jasmine25
      Jasmine25
      (22 years old)
    4. Trev0rK
      Trev0rK
      (26 years old)
  • Posts

    • EasyE
      Republicans have long committed grave errors by emphasizing their social agenda and moral issues instead of just focusing on the economy, lowering taxes, keeping the public safe, building a strong national defense, promoting business, touting reasonable immigration policies, etc.   The country would thrive economically under Trump's tax and business policies. That's a fact. Another four years of Biden will run this country into the ground financially (including all of our 401Ks and IRAs). But the GOP continues to play right into the Dems' hands by leading with their moral crusades instead of staying the course and trusting their fiscal policies to win the day... 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-news/hundreds-athletes-urge-ncaa-not-ban-trans-athletes-womens-sports-rcna149033     Carolyn Marie
    • KymmieL
      Well first day is over and now getting ready for bed soon. Work was OK.   Don't know why but I am feeling down. I am heading to bed. Good Night.   Kymmie
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boyfriend and I our time at my place.Both admit our sex life is good,got intimate for the 2nd time and he is good at it
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  I will look those up in the document, hopefully tomorrow.   I always look at the source on stuff like this, not what someone, particularly those adversarial, have to say. 
    • MaeBe
      LGBTQ rights Project 2025 takes extreme positions against LGBTQ rights, seeking to eliminate federal protections for queer people and pursue research into conversion therapies in order to encourage gender and sexuality conformity. The policy book also lays out plans to criminalize being transgender and prohibit federal programs from supporting queer people through various policies. The project partnered with anti-LGBTQ groups the Family Policy Alliance, the Center for Family and Human Rights, and the Family Research Council. Project 2025 calls for the next secretary of Health and Human Services to “immediately put an end to the department’s foray into woke transgender activism,” which includes removing terms related to gender and sexual identity from “every federal rule, agency regulation, contract, grant, regulation, and piece of legislation that exists.” The Trump administration proposed a similar idea in 2018 that would have resulted in trans people losing protections under anti-discrimination laws. [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023; The New Republic, 2/8/24] Similarly, the policy book calls for HHS to stop all research related to gender identity unless the purpose is conformity to one's sex assigned at birth. The New Republic explains: “That is, research on gender-nonconforming children and teenagers should be funded by the government, but only for the purpose of studying what will make them conform, such as denying them gender-affirming care and instead trying to change their identities through ‘counseling,’ which is a form of conversion therapy.” [The New Republic, 2/8/24] The policy book’s foreword by Kevin Roberts describes “the omnipresent propagation of transgender ideology and sexualization of children” as “pornography” that “should be outlawed,” adding, “The people who produce and distribute it should be imprisoned.” Roberts also says that “educators and public librarians who purvey it should be classed as registered sex offenders. And telecommunications and technology firms that facilitate its spread should be shuttered.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023] Roberts’ foreword states that “allowing parents or physicians to ‘reassign’ the sex of a minor is child abuse and must end.” Echoing ongoing right-wing attacks on trans athletes, Roberts also claims, “Bureaucrats at the Department of Justice force school districts to undermine girls’ sports and parents’ rights to satisfy transgender extremists.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023; TIME magazine, 5/16/22] Dame Magazine reports that Project 2025 plans to use the Department of Justice to crack down on states that “do not charge LGBTQ people and their allies with crimes under the pretense that they are breaking federal and state laws against exposing minors to pornography.” [Dame Magazine, 8/14/23] Project 2025 also calls for the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services to repeat “its 2016 decision that CMS could not issue a National Coverage Determination (NCD) regarding ‘gender reassignment surgery’ for Medicare beneficiaries.” The policy book’s HHS chapter continues: “In doing so, CMS should acknowledge the growing body of evidence that such interventions are dangerous and acknowledge that there is insufficient scientific evidence to support such coverage in state plans.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023] Going further, Project 2025 also demands that the next GOP administration “reverse policies that allow transgender individuals to serve in the military.” The policy book’s chapter on the Defense Department claims: “Gender dysphoria is incompatible with the demands of military service, and the use of public monies for transgender surgeries … for servicemembers should be ended.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023]   …summaries of what’s within the rest of the document re: LGBTQ+ concerns. A person can believe their gender is fixed but incongruent with their physiology, but the authors and Trump (by his own words) just see the incongruity of an “expressed gender” that conflicts with what was/is in a person’s pants.
    • Mmindy
      Good catch… I took care of it.
    • Sally Stone
      I'm tired of the two-party system.  It has degraded to a system where there are only two diametrically opposed views, neither of which supports me.  I have conservative views regarding big government and government spending but I have very liberal views when it comes to protecting the rights of individuals.  And just elections of the past, I am stuck with two choices, neither of which I support. With only two parties, each with agendas that are off the left and right scales, I am not adequately represented.    Finally, I'm okay with party affiliated politicians running for office using their party views, but once elected to office, they are obligated to support the entire electorate not just the electorate members that voted for them.  Plain and simple, our government system is broken and dysfunctional.  I'll step down from my soapbox now.     
    • Sally Stone
      Thanks Mae.  She was an amazing friend and I grew to love her like a sister.
    • Sally Stone
      I did Ashley.  Non-rev travel was one of the major factors for taking the job.  At the time, US Airways had the best non-rev policy in the industry.  It cost $10 to fly coach and $25 to fly first class.  We flew first class whenever there were seats available.  
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You should have a moderator fix what you meant to write as "birth certificate".  Ooops.   I've gone over that verse and am wholly and completely dissatisfied with the SBC exegesis of it, so much so that it was one of the things that helped me break out of a mindset of guit.  Sometime I may strut by stuff as a Hebraist and show what it really means.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I found this   — 450 — Mandate for Leadership: The Conservative Promise Goal #1: Protecting Life, Conscience, and Bodily Integrity. The Secretary should pursue a robust agenda to protect the fundamental right to life, protect con- science rights, and uphold bodily integrity rooted in biological realities, not ideology. From the moment of conception, every human being possesses inherent dignity and worth, and our humanity does not depend on our age, stage of development, race, or abilities. The Secretary must ensure that all HHS programs and activities are rooted in a deep respect for innocent human life from day one until natural death: Abortion and euthanasia are not health care. A robust respect for the sacred rights of conscience, both at HHS and among gov- ernments and institutions funded by it, increases choices for patients and program beneficiaries and furthers pluralism and tolerance. The Secretary must protect Americans’ civil rights by ensuring that HHS programs and activities follow the letter and spirit of religious freedom and conscience-protection laws. Radical actors inside and outside government are promoting harmful identity politics that replaces biological sex with subjective notions of “gender identity” and bases a person’s worth on his or her race, sex, or other identities. This destructive dogma, under the guise of “equity,” threatens American’s fundamental liberties as well as the health and well-being of children and adults alike. The next Secretary must ensure that HHS programs protect children’s minds and bodies and that HHS programs respect parents’ basic right to direct the upbringing, education, and care of their children.   https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_CHAPTER-14.pdf   First, that is not much, if that is all that is of concern.  Secondly, I have seen all sorts of anti-Trump slander, including the Steele dossier and the lawfare he is now undergoing, to be cynical of any criticism against him, and indirectly this document.    He deserves some of what he is getting, but not all.  Thirdly, I bolded one statement of concern.   I don't think gender identity is subjective.  "Radical actors" is name calling, and there is a lot of that going around.  Maybe I am not seeing everything of concern or reading this right, but i would discuss with the author of this document concerning this.
    • Willow
      Good evening   well I finally finished reading my textbook.  Yeah.  But I still have a lot more to go for the class.     My endocrinologist always asks me about lactation.  And yes I have had some very small amounts of leakage but not on any regular basis.  I figure I blocked the discharge Duce when I pierced my nipples with scare tissue.  But who knows.  I also get asked about mammograms.  I e had my first or baseline and this fall I will need to schedule my second.   As someone in the midst of studying the Old Testament, I can say that I haven’t found any mention of pending damnation for being transgender or intersex.  The closest it comes is a verse that says men should not wear women’s clothing.  Now I don’t know each and everyone’s particulars, but I know I meet the medical definition of female gender, and even in Ohio, a State that until recently refused to allow birth certificates to be changed, I meet the criteria.  Therefore I can only conclude I am not a man wearing women’s clothing.  But there is a somewhat different scholarly explanation of that law that it should not be taken as literally as the haters want.  Mostly men should not pretend to be women to ex ape from their enemies. Or tried to hide from God.     willow
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Well, the left wing has been doing that.    I read a few things while trying to find out what the problem is and liked what I read.  But I am a conservative.    Is there something specific in there that is of concern?  Does it promise somewhere to erase trans folk? That would be problematic.
    • Ivy
      It's a plan to basically completely take over the government by the right wing.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...