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Dana Michelle

Male Privilege and Transgender Women

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KayC

Thank you @Susan R for sharing that post.  That was an uplifting experience and nice to hear how much it helped you.  I hope I can experience the same someday.

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KayC
22 hours ago, Sally Stone said:

I don't believe this is a common view, however, because most cis women I have met and interacted with are perfectly okay with my feminine self-expression.

Thank you for your reply, Sally.  Between your response and @Susan R's this is comforting.


Maybe I already knew the answer?  this in not a trans/LGBTQ+, or cis-man/woman issue, its a human issue.  How we treat each other as human beings.  That's my experience in life also, that people who are secure in themselves will treat other with understanding and respect ... and those that aren't ... ?  Well I guess it doesn't matter what "category" they identify with.

Thanks again❣️

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Erikka

  Something my ex said years ago after coming home from a book club meeting has stuck with me and having left the dark, I am always checking myself to see if I am doing it. Men and boys in school, talk over women and girls in school. From a very early age males instinctively become the dominate gender.  Watch for it. It is always there. The notion of the male gender being stronger equates males being more important and being more important what they have to say is almost ALWAYS the implied consent to run over women. A friend of mine, a cultural anthropologist, lays the blame on patriarchal societies and in matriarchal societies the opposite is true. 
  In the thirty years since my ex’s revelation it is something I watch for and for the most part, it is a valid observation. Since transitioning the scenario plays out, time and time again. I would add that to feminine mannerisms to further your transition in order to be acceptable as a woman. Do I think we should acquiesce to male privilege rudeness? No, but be aware, it is there.

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MaryMary

We all have different experiences and I can only talk for myself but I grew up ... different. Although the word or concept of transgender did not exist at the time in my city and community I was quite visible in my transgenderness, lol (sorry for the new word, hahaha) When I think about male privilege I always feel like I almost had it. But the truth is that I was so different and cast aside that while the boys where having their special treatment I was beaten down by one anyway so I was not listening or there to receive this special treatment. Since it was not cool to be my friend I was rejected by gangs of girls too, or worst they made fun of me. Later when I was a teenager I did make a couple of friends but they always stopped hanging with me when they had a boyfriend.... lollll So I didn't even had what female had neither. I was just a reject and a miserable, suicidal misfit.

 

I think I did not have male privilege, nor even female privilege. I had knuckle privilege, I was the first to receive the punch, lol

 

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Just Lee
2 hours ago, Erikka said:

Watch for it. It is always there. The notion of the male gender being stronger equates males being more important and being more important what they have to say is almost ALWAYS the implied consent to run over women. 

In the thirty years since my ex’s revelation it is something I watch for and for the most part, it is a valid observation. Since transitioning the scenario plays out, time and time again. I would add that to feminine mannerisms to further your transition in order to be acceptable as a woman. Do I think we should acquiesce to male privilege rudeness? No, but be aware, it is there.

YES! Absolutely! Well written response right there Erikka! Here here!

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Susan R
5 hours ago, KayC said:

That was an uplifting experience and nice to hear how much it helped you.  I hope I can experience the same someday.

I have no doubt you will.😁

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Dana Michelle

Very well said.

 

2 hours ago, MaryMary said:

We all have different experiences and I can only talk for myself but I grew up ... different. Although the word or concept of transgender did not exist at the time in my city and community I was quite visible in my transgenderness, lol (sorry for the new word, hahaha) When I think about male privilege I always feel like I almost had it. But the truth is that I was so different and cast aside that while the boys where having their special treatment I was beaten down by one anyway so I was not listening or there to receive this special treatment. Since it was not cool to be my friend I was rejected by gangs of girls too, or worst they made fun of me. Later when I was a teenager I did make a couple of friends but they always stopped hanging with me when they had a boyfriend.... lollll So I didn't even had what female had neither. I was just a reject and a miserable, suicidal misfit.

 

I think I did not have male privilege, nor even female privilege. I had knuckle privilege, I was the first to receive the punch, lol

 

 

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KathyLauren
3 hours ago, Erikka said:

Men and boys in school, talk over women and girls in school. From a very early age males instinctively become the dominate gender.  Watch for it. It is always there. The notion of the male gender being stronger equates males being more important and being more important what they have to say is almost ALWAYS the implied consent to run over women. A friend of mine, a cultural anthropologist, lays the blame on patriarchal societies and in matriarchal societies the opposite is true.

 

In yet another unnoticed early hint that I was trans, I would let men talk over me and interrupt me.  I didn't instinctively claim that particular male privilege.  I did eventually claim it when I realized that I was being un-masculine in allowing others to do that.  Since at that point, I was still hiding from myself and trying to be male, I trained myself to interrupt others.

 

Now, I catch myself doing it, and a little warning bell goes off: "You just did it again.  Not very lady-like." 

 

There is probably a happy medium.  People should be allowed to finish their thoughts, provided they aren't hogging the conversation.

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