Finally spoke to a physician about HRT

[Tory Aoi]

My therapist recommended I reach out to a particular doctor's office, and I'll admit my expectations were reserved.  I didn't want to set myself up for disappointment.  Still, I was nervous as heck as any of you can imagine.  I hate visiting doctors for any reason, but I've been trying to build up my resolve and determination on this for some time and I was not about to allow my anxiety get the better of me on this.  I actually almost cancelled, almost lied to the assistant about why I was there too.  But I took a deep breath, and said that I was there to discuss transgender issues and what they could do to help me.  There was no judgement, she nodded as she made note of that and said that they could certainly help with that.

 

I got to see a nurse practitioner today, and from the moment she walked in and introduced her self I could tell that this was going to go well.  She asked me what name I would prefer to be called by, and so after settling my nerves a bit I said she could call me Tory.  And then most of the rest of the visit we had a very relaxing conversation about HRT, its effects, and what I would need to do if I wanted to get started.  All in all, it was a very affirming experience for me and I walked away from it feeling rather hopeful.  Next steps will be I have to have blood tests, of course, just to make sure everything looks as it should and get a letter from my therapist.  My next follow-up will be on September 1st, and if all goes well it looks possible I could start HRT not long after that I think.  I admit, it has me feeling a bit euphoric at the moment.

[Cyndee]

Nice update Tory, you're moving forward.

 

Congrats on getting the ball rolling, and taking those first steps, it's a nice feeling to find someone caring....

 

Hugs

 

Cyndee

[Heather Shay]

That is fantastic news Tory.  It isn't easy and I must say I am proud of you getting up the courage to do what you know is right for you. One step at a time and you my dear have taken a big giant step.

Shay

[Tory Aoi]

Thank you @Cyndee and @Shay, it really is a wonderful feeling and I really never thought I could get this far.  This is entirely new territory for me, but it's a good feeling.

 

What I have ahead of me now is to get over my medical terrors (it's a bit more complex than simple fear of needles).  My physician recommended this, which could be very helpful in going through the ordeal of having blood drawn for me.  This could be a life-saver for me!

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B076ZSMB9Y/ref=nav_timeline_asin?_encoding=UTF8&th=1

[Jackie C.]

Yeah, I've got some white coat anxiety myself. I don't feel it consciously, but it always blows up my blood pressure numbers. I feel relaxed, but my vitals tell a different story. Very vexing.

 

Congratulations on getting started though and good luck on getting over your medical terrors!

 

Hugs!

[Jani]

Very good Tory!  I'm glad the nerves melted away.  You'll be fine!

Hugs, Jani

[Kylie]

So excited for you! I know the feeling, I have the white coat syndrome too - despite working with lots of doctors everyday in the icu! Just remember, this is all to better yourself and help you accomplish what you know to be needed. I remember meeting with my Gender Therapist and undergoing all the requirements to meet eligibility to get where I am today some two years later! It is all worth it and it is  a blessing! Stay well!

 

Kylie

[Mia Marie]

Congrats on having a good meeting and getting the ball rolling. I had my first appointment with my physician and got my labs although I did already got my letter from my psychologist which made it easier to get as far as I did. I send prayers that you will be fine. 

[Tory Aoi]

Thanks everyone for the support.  I just wanted to give a quick update, I went into the lab to have blood drawn, the big thing that had me so terrified.  I used the buzzy device I mentioned earlier, and to my surprise it worked!  Sure there was still a sting of pain, but between that and the slow breathing my wife recommended I do I managed to keep calm and my phobia didn't trigger.  When it was over, I felt so happy I almost cried.  They'll probably have the results next week, but I am so relieved that I now have a strategy for dealing with this.

[Tori M]

Congrats, Tory!  (Love the name, btw ?) Finally making those first steps of progress does feel SO good, doesn't it?  With practice, those needles become easier, too.  I know, I've been known to almost black out from shots and I did black out a few minutes when I got my ears pierced.  Despite working in a hospital for years (in I.T.), I've been terrified of needles and anything medical my whole life.  I was that kid that used to scream, cry and try to run away.  I am so sensitive to pain, I swear I can feel a needle inside my veins, which isn't really possible, but it makes my stomach flip.  Being fairly healthy I've escaped any "medical assaults" until I started HRT.  It's critically important to monitor your chem levels throughout the process, so hang in there, it really does get better.

 

A couple of tips from experience... one, don't be afraid of telling them about your fear/anxiety.  I was so embarrassed to tell them but found they are very understanding and will usually thank you for warning them, because you are not the only one.  They've had patients pass out, so they would much rather know ahead of time.  Two, if they're not already using them, ask the blood drawer to use a "butterfly".  The needle is so short/tiny you can barely feel it and it doesn't move around while they're drawing.

 

Recent experience with a blood disorder which requires that I get frequent phlebotomies brought on a whole new level of fear.  This is similar to donating blood and uses a larger needle so they can capture the larger blood cells.  When they first told me about it, I was absolutely terrified!  I seriously didn't think I could do it, but my life depended on it.  So, I told the phlebotomist I might pass out and then used distraction techniques like you mentioned.  It really hurt at first but eased up after they got the needle in and settled for about 15 minutes while a pint drained out.  Each time I've had one since, it got easier and easier until now (after a dozen or so), believe it or not, I can do it without any anxiety at all.  The experienced nurses/technicians are SO good at what they do!  The great thing is that after I got used to that big needle, I don't even feel the little ones anymore!  So, to anyone with the needle fear, I now recommend donating blood as a [courageous] way to resolve the problem.

 

For HRT, I would suggest you ask for estradiol tabs that you can dissolve under your tongue.  I still don't think I could give myself shots, especially into the muscle.  Good luck with your therapy.  In a couple of months you're going to start feeling much more like "yourself".

[Mia Marie]

congrats on getting your labs. don't be surprised if it takes longer than a week to get your scripts done so you can start taking your hrt. I got my labs done last week and it has been over a week and I still havent heard from my doctor on her assessment of my results. still hoping I can get my hrt before my next doc appointment.

[Tory Aoi]

Exciting update to this.  This morning I had my follow-up appointment, got my paperwork turned in the week prior, and she said everything looked good in terms of my bloodwork numbers.  She got my prescription sent off to the pharmacy.  So as of 5:23 PM EDT today I have taken my first dose and am officially on HRT!

[Heather Shay]

Fantastic I am so happy for you and these tears I have are not because of my HRT that I am now in my 8th week but because I am happy for you. Welcome to physical womanhood starting 5:23PM EDT. Treasure that moment always.

[Cyndee]

50 minutes ago, Tory Aoi said:

  So as of 5:23 PM EDT today I have taken my first dose and am officially on HRT!

 

Strap yourself in, things are going to get far more interesting...

 

Hugs and happy times 

 

Cyndee 

[MirandaB]

Yay!

[Lexi C]

RhondaS is right

YAY!!

[Elizabeth Star]

congrats.  And what Cyndee said.

[Mia Marie]

Congrats to you. I personally am at the end of my first week. Don't try rushing it and I am sure everything will be ok. Just remember to take them as prescribed.

[Lexi C]

congrats.  And what Cyndee and Elizbeth said 

[KayC]

Whoooohooo!  That's exciting @Tory Aoi!  Thank you for keeping us updated.  Very happy for you❣️

[Charlize]

Congratulations Tori Aoi.  Hope your feet are still connected to the earth.  I remember feeling so happy and somehow lighter.

Enjoy the world that will slowly unfold before you.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Bobbie Scott]

Congratulations, I too remembered being scared. But the staff and doctor were very friendly from the get go.I remember shaking like a leaf,the day I got my hormones. Hope you have many good experiences. 

[Ellora]

On 9/2/2020 at 1:08 AM, Tory Aoi said:

as of 5:23 PM EDT today I have taken my first dose and am officially on HRT!

Yay!! Congratulations!! This is Super exciting !! 

Edited September 3, 2020 by tracy_j
Edited as requested

[SaraAW]

Congrats!!!

[Bobbie Scott]

Congratulations girl.