I'm so lost..??

[Shawna]

Hi my name's Sean I'm a 26 year old male with a big block in my mined. Every sence I was a kid I have always loved femine things playing dress up with my girl friends tea and so on.. As I got older the things I enjoyed faded and got replaced by more boy oriented things like sports and out side work. But I could never quite shake the urge to still my mom's close make up things like that. In Joinor high I got spot lighted by family and sent to counseling by my parents though I was gay. Witch sent me in to a big worl wind. I ended up marring and divorcing my best friend who's close I also still lol and still to this day where women's close. It just feels right but my body don't after many failed relationships and tring to live the life my family wants I think it's time to do what's right for me I just don't know if it's really right all the sings point but I'm not sure if it's uncertainty or guilt that is holding me back. live in Arkansas so that being said it's kinda hard to come out friends and family everyone hears so close mined at least it seams that way. Any advice helps thank y'all for reading my ramble much love 

[Abi]

Hi Shawna,

    There may be a pflag group or similar lbgtq community near you. You will find an accepting group of people there to talk to if you are ready for that. That could be a place to look for support. It is also really good to seek a gender therapist so you can talk out some feelings and gain confidence in your feelings. I know your state well and there is definitely a lot of negative there but, you are not alone. You will find friends here too. We all like to listen and help if we can. I used to steal my mom's makeup and run in the woods to get made up, then I would hurry to clean it all off and get home before dark. No one just knows everything that they like right away. We are curious by nature. Be patient with your feelings. You will figure out what you need, when the time is right.

 

Abi

[Shawna]

Thanks Abi and I honestly think I am ready to do something about it I'm currently looking in to the lbgtq communitys hear and plan on talking to my mental health consler about things a little more. I've been living out more trying to not hide my femine side I can say that living with the little routines and dressing more as I feel not as I have to hasaif me not just happier but more confident and comfortable with my self I can't wait to see where letting myself show takes me its definitely better then the dark scared and depressed 24_25 year ? thank u for all the love 

[Confused1]

Hi Shawna,

 

I think the closest PLAG to you is in Fayetteville, a little North of me. Per their website, their email address is: [email protected]  and their phone number is: 479-310-5205.

 

There is an LGBT group in Fort Smith, but they are closed now due to the COVID. I would think there should be an LGBT group in Little Rock also, but I don't know where.

 

As Abi said, you should find a gender therapist and get an appointment. The first time I went I was scared to death I would end up in a "rubber room" due to living in this area. I was pleasantly surprised. Within 15 minutes I was made to feel totally comfortable and not alone.

 

Hugs,

Mike

 

 

[Carolyn Marie]

Hi, Shawna and welcome to Trans Pulse.  I can understand your confusion and concerns.  There is a lot to learn and a lot of fear and anxiety once you realize that you might be part of our community.  Along with the link that Mike provided, we have a resource locator you can find Here.  But Mike is correct that you're best bet for resources is probably Little Rock.

 

Please look around the forums and read and respond to whatever is of interest.  If you need help finding anything please ask.  We're here to help.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie