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Edeyn Blackeney Apology Over Transgender Hoax Of Raychel Roo

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The following is an apology from Eeyore also known as edeyn blackeney over her transgender hoax.

I have copied this to some people that have an interest in my well-being.

----------------------------------

I know some of you will always hate me. I will have to live with that. I know some of you won't believe me. I will have to live with that, too. What I want you all to at least consider is, I didn't do anything to hurt any of you on purpose. I have no right to ask anything of any of you, but... I am. Please, at least read this letter through. I know you're all angry at me, and I can't help that.

I have had issues with a version of DID or MPD or whatever they're calling it currently in the past. I thought it was behind me. This is the first time that it has hurt people other than me, however. To say that I am appalled, and horrified -- this is expected, even if it's true, and most of you won't think any better of me. Counseling peppers my life from the time I left home, and I spent part of today trying to locate someone in this area that would be able to help me.

I am terrified that I have hurt anyone, especially those I care about. There was no malicious intent. This was not a stunt. My form of DID/MPD is known as highly-functional, meaning that I can be a part of "normal" society with no one the wiser. I don't want to lie to anyone. One thing I'm pretty sure I can count on from now on, that relieves me, is that if something about me seems suspicious in the future -- I know everyone will call me on it IMMEDIATELY.

Whether you believe me or not, Raychel (or Roo) was as real to me as to any of you. There are hundreds of emails exchanged between me and Roo. When I was confronted on Saturday morning, and throughout Saturday afternoon and evening, I was shocked that anyone could think such a thing. I knew she was real. I was proud of her accomplishments. I was upset that anyone would make a mockery of what she'd been through by making such accusations. I was in denial.

Around 11pm, maybe a little later (Central Time), all hell broke loose -- this was Saturday the 20th. I was looking through and trying to find out what would make anyone think such a thing. What I discovered was that anyone would think such a thing because there's no other conclusion to reach. It all filled my head. Everything Roo had done for nearly 2 years, as though I were standing behind her watching the entire thing happen. I spent the next half hour dry-heaving in the bathroom.

What have I done? I have all these memories, of things shared and people I've grown to love... and I'm a stranger to them, because the person they all knew was a façade. I immediately began trying to contact people, maybe if I explain, they'll understand? Maybe they won't blindly hate me?

Everything that was Roo, was real, in as much a way as possible. She -- I -- wanted to help people like me.

The problem is, in the past, when the stressful situations that have called for this kind of response from my mind have been alleviated, the person or people it has created... self-destructs. It's a theory that this is done so that I don't have a way to go back. A few times, this has been less than smooth, as it's forced me to confront the UNreality of someone I held dear. At one point, I went to a funeral of a close friend that I had grown up with, to find no funeral. No headstone, even. I went to the house she had lived in and the couple who had lived there for forty years informed me that they had no idea what I was talking about. Having to face it, the block crumbled in the same way that just happened with Roo.

In a way that I know would be and is creepy, Roo is still here, but I can't go back to being her. I care deeply about all of you. There are those that I felt connected to a lot more, but you will likely never want to speak to me again. Danielle. Sherlyn. MamaShar. MJ. Karen. Jay. Casey. These are not the only people I cared about. They are the ones I was closest to, however. I want you all to know... I never meant to hurt anyone. I don't care that my reputation as who I "really" am is trashed. You're all probably going to hate me forever. I ... would really like to still know and love and care for you all, but I also know that's not likely. What I care about is that you know that I did not set out to hurt you, that I did not set out to hurt anyone.

I denied what was going on when confronted because I really thought everyone had lost it. I mean, I -knew- Roo was real, I'd hugged her, even. I could have continued denying all of this, and probably recovered from it. But, to me... that would be downright evil. I really can't do that.

I will try to explain how the process generally "works" for me. Throughout my life, when there have been situations that I need an out of this kind, someone new comes into my life. Most people conceive of DID/MPD as being internalized. I actually see and interact with these people. I am convinced despite what later are looked at as obvious giveaways, that they are as real as I am. There have been times in which there were many of them at one time -- so when I had experienced this a few times and had entered counseling, it would lend credibility that other people knew they were there. It was recursive logic, but I didn't realize. I even had a "twin sister" for a very long time, that I had to protect from bad things happening to her. This meant putting up with those bad things myself, and it was okay that I wasn't coming forward against those doing them because I was protecting my sister.

Why did Roo have to "die" in such a horrible fashion? Why did Roo have to "die" at all? I don't know. I don't have an answer for that. As I said, when the situation has moved to the point that I no longer need such help, the alter self-destructs in such a way that I cannot go back.

Everything that Roo was, still is, if that helps anyone at all.

I know I have no right to hope for it, but... I would dearly love to begin again with friendship, with all of you, but particularly... those that I was closest to as Roo.

A lot of you have wondered what might be the "motive" for all of this. There was none. The only motive was Roo seeking somewhere to belong and to help. There was never anything malicious in all of this, I never wanted to hurt anyone, and for what it's worth... everything I said I truly believed.

There is much more to say, but I will end this here, for now.

edeyn blackeney

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Guest ~Brenda~
The following is an apology from Eeyore also known as edeyn blackeney over her transgender hoax.

In June 2009, a “transkid” murder hoax perpetrated by “KuryousKyooty” aka "Rachel" aka “Roo” aka “Raychel Edeyn Wilson”

That's all I have to say

Brenda

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Guest Neuro

No hate from this side of the screen... forgive and forget, is what I say. I hope this person known as "Roo" gets some help, I hope that they do not beat themselves up too hard but I also hope that they do not lie like this anymore.

Alter-egoes and such is a very difficult and dangerous subject, disorder... I do not have malicious wishes toward this person, I am only sad that so much effort was spent on such a hoax; when that same person could have used all that energy to better their lives with truth.

Love you all, bless you all. <3

--Neuro

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Guest Laura T.

... potatoz.... ok next time she dos this... she should just wright a book... i'm serious... edger Allen Poe could not wright it better.... idk... if it can make me dream the things i did... wow... i have mpd.... its crazy.... i know how things work in some weird ways ... i dont hate her... i cant... im cool... i ain't that creative tho... just vary fractured.... i would be her friend.... i mean were all human but we can all do with some betterment... i am an omnitologist so yea... potatoz... :huh:

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Guest JoshuaJennifer

Hmmm... well, i've faced a lot of people committing hoaxes over the net (some still attempting to make them work); as for this, I'd say that though the apology was one thing, it's not enough - before some people say i'm being too harsh at least hear me out. The apology isn't the thing that needs to be taken into account, it's the change on the indevidual, the 'reforming' so to say; if this was an honest mistake on their part and they are going to make an effort to change their ways, then I can forgive them because they TRULY recognise their error and honestly want to change; if it's just for the sake of an apology with no change... pfft >.>

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Guest Casey101

To be honest with everyone, I don't believe this whole DID/MPD thing. I'll be willing to forgive and forget as soon as she's honest with us. I don't feel that this is honest, I feel that shes just trying to make up yet another story. It's a shame, really.

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Carolyn Marie

At this point, I'm a skeptic. MPD is exceedingly rare. Seems awfully convenient that she has such a rare disorder as

an excuse. And that's IF this is really Roo posting the apology. How can we verify the identity of the author?

Anything is possible, but once burned, twice shy...

Carolyn Marie

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Guest Ashley fl

huh . wow!!!!!

i was speechless when there was the car accident , i was speechless when she was in the hospital

this last time , i was speechless when it was said that roo died , i was speechless when it was found

out to be a hoax , i am speechless over reading what i just read , in post thought i think i will be

speechless .

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Sally

I had already forgiven Roo and I see no need to take that back, life is too short to hold a grudge, as far as accepting her back it would have to have numerous conditions attatched,

The most important being to seek and continue with professional help.

If the MPD is indeed true then this person needs help, if it was a stunt to get attention then this person needs help and if it was done to hurt us then this person needs help.

I guess that sums it up, this person needs professional help.

Forgiving is easy for me forgeting is much harder.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest karen_h

I talked with edyen on the phone for about half an hour before this letter was written, during most of the time

she was either crying or throwing up. I believe her apology is sincere, and that the MPD is plausible, i have

seen switching between alters several times with others and I can understand.

I can forgive, HOWEVER I can't forget. She caused much grief here and thru sites around the world.

I'll leave it for y'all to decide individually how you feel about her apology.

Karen_h

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MaryEllen

I can forgive but like several others have stated, I won't forget. To be honest, I'm still very skeptical about all of this. Is she really sincere or is she running another scam on us?? Time will tell.

MaryEllen

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Guest Donna Jean

The bear was going to cross the river. The snake said "Bear, please give me a ride"

The bear said "No' you're a snake and you'll bite me and I'll die".

The snake said "No I promise that I won't, I need to get across the river".

The bear took the snake and started across the river...the snake bit him...

The Bear said .."You promised not to bite me...now I'll die!"

The snake said..."You knew I was a snake when you picked me up!"

Donna Jean

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Guest Leigh
To be honest with everyone, I don't believe this whole DID/MPD thing. I'll be willing to forgive and forget as soon as she's honest with us. I don't feel that this is honest, I feel that shes just trying to make up yet another story. It's a shame, really.

yeah.

what's to say this isn't just another plea for attention.

as the old saying goes: 'fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice shame on me'

peace

leigh

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Guest Angel21

I have DID/MPD mysef so i can understand how confusing it can be to have it

but it don't mean that i can go around making up things about my self or another altered personality

it dose not excuse what she has done to people on this forum nor dose it make her less responsibility for her actions or the actions of her altered personality . i have responsibility for what my personalizes do weather i remember or not

this person made up that " roo" was murdered raped and tortured purely for attention purposes to get the kind of reaction that happened with the roo hoax yes this person needs help but she needs to see that her actions have consequence

Angel

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Guest Mika N.

Speaking for myself, I forgive this person. Though I cannot speak for others this person may have hurt.

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Guest Madison_Always
yeah.

what's to say this isn't just another plea for attention.

as the old saying goes: 'fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice shame on me'

peace

leigh

I dont plan on being fooled again...sry edeyn trust is earned, especially after it is lost once.

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Guest Martin

I don't believe this. I'm not an expert on DID/MPD, but everything I ever read about it is completely different. The people I met who had it had a completely different experience. I know there are mental illnesses that CAN have symptoms like this, but they are not DID/MPD.

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Guest S. Chrissie
I talked with edyen on the phone for about half an hour before this letter was written, during most of the time

she was either crying or throwing up. I believe her apology is sincere, and that the MPD is plausible, i have

seen switching between alters several times with others and I can understand.

I can forgive, HOWEVER I can't forget. She caused much grief here and thru sites around the world.

I'll leave it for y'all to decide individually how you feel about her apology.

Karen_h

If that's what you said, Karen, then I will forgive her. I will be asking a few clinical psych. lecturers of mine on DID and see what I can dig out.

She sounds sincere and if she's honest, I might forgive her.

BUT, I need something cleared up first.

1. She did not only impersonate Roo, but also Roo's mum. Roo's dead and she can't acces that personality anymore, BUT Mum's very well alive, I want to know where's Mum's personality.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjTOs1L3SBg

Here's a video on DID.

Sherlyn

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Guest nova

Who are you?

what's the point. your credibility and trust are gone. and since you claim you can't control it and therefore you shouldn't be held accountable you'll never get it back, but then you say, don't worry, even though you're a fraud--your deceptions are only helping us anyway!? Yah, you really proved that, didn't you. New York is not in the Central time zone. You're in New York? Oops!.

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Guest Zelane

Who its this Edeyn person is? I mean is she even real? What about all the stuff she has told about her life?

More like MPD it looks like we are seeing pathological lying.

The most simply disturbing thing that SCREAMS "give me attention" its the way the Roo character died... All that BS of a life its meh. Please go find help for whatever you are and stop bothering people around here and elsewhere.

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Guest van-na

Dear Edeyn,

<<<hug>>>

The truth as I see it, is that no one really knows the truth about anything.

I read your words carefully.

I noticed that you never said that you were sorry.

And you never asked for forgiveness.

Anyway, I forgive you !

:wub: vanna

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Guest Isobelle Fox

There are people that I love dearly who have struggled with profound mental illness all their lives. I've seen it cause incredible pain and have experienced some of that pain myself. So, I have great sympathy for people who have these extremely difficult struggles in their lives and for their families and their friends.

I didn't know Rachel. I was deeply disturbed by her "death," though. It went to the core of my own personal fears and broke my heart that such a thing could happen.

Still, in this case, which is just unutterably bizarre, really, and only getting stranger, I feel neither anger nor the need to forgive. MPD or not, its very clear that the person who "created" Rachel, interacted with others here as Rachel, and then fabricated her "death" is very disturbed and definitely needs help. I hope that they seek and recieve it.

And saying that, I am personally closing the book on this whole thing and moving on. I feel no anger towards anyone, but I've nothing else to say about it and plan to do some serious washing of the hands now before going back to "real" life. Whatever that may be.

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Guest 1Char

I don't trust u.

I wish longevity and happiness to you and anyone you care about.

Charlotte

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Guest Soph

This entire Roo situation just has me incredibly confused.

From the first story of the murder to this one...

So then Roo is just some character made up by this Edeyn person?

But if we are to trust Edeyn (which I am a tad bit skeptical to do so) it was entirely unintended...

How rare is MPD?

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Guest Eth

I have to agree with Sally. If she does have MPD, then she needs professional help. If she doesn't have MPD and is a compulsive liar or just doing this out of malice, then she needs professional help.

What more is there to say?

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