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    • A. Dillon
      Also, when looking for what suits you, I would -now stay with me here - go to Goodwill. It is an easy, affordable way to figure out what looks good on you, and really lets you develop a personal style.
    • A. Dillon
      I have a pretty good eye for fashion, and really enjoy it as an art form however, when it comes to how I dress, baggy tough jeans, a t-shirt and a hoodie is more than enough for me to look in the mirror and say "my man!" I am also far too messy to keep up a nice wardrobe; I keep all of my clothes in a pile on top of my bed. My cats like sleeping in it, and it is so cute. But seriously Spencer, if you are looking for young men's fashion, it starts and ends with the hoodie. There is only 1 guy I know who doesn't wear them daily, and that is because he wears sweatshirts instead. What type you wear can say a lot about you (as crazy as that sounds), and you can pair them with a winter coat, a jean jacket, whatever makes it feel more you.
    • Jani
      I suppose this is because she sees you as dead now?  Sad that she cannot see past the thin outer skin to the core of your life, which I can only imagine has been fine up until now.  Do your best to stay happy and healthy Donna.  This will be your reward.      Jani
    • magical realism
      Hi megan,its nice to hear your story, when i think of someone transitioning i dont necessarilly think of them as wanting to become something, with the proper frame of mind youre only merely cultivating whats already there,i dont know, i have a lot to learn, i just thought it might help a little,be well.
    • Miseria
      I dreamed about this 12 damn years have passed and now it’s poison do I drink the poison now I’m left here and I can’t wait do I still drink the poison it’s like my body can’t even awake drinks of poison do I drink the poison about to die you can’t take away this life drink the poison a new kind of poison Can’t avoid every void til I can drop down there is no more poison I stopped drinking the poison
    • DonnaBall
      Thanks Jackie,  I think their logic is that God made you a male and you are going against His will and his intention.  My logic is that birth defects happen and He allows them as he allows an imperfect world. Life would be boring and we would not have a need for God if everything was perfect.  If you want perfect go for heaven.    So when you are TG, God, in my humble opinion accepts that and DOES NOT want you to worry about His judgment with that issue and He IS kind and loving and has been to me.  God is not the problem, Evangelical Christians are and they are in the minority among Christians.  More and more denominations are arriving at accepting LGBT as "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR" trumps all other issues.    So as to my wife, she was made that way too, believing what she does and she can't help it any more than we can.  She finds comfort in believing all the rules and that makes her feel safe, so I love her and don't hold it against her and I feel bad about how this is affecting the last years of life that she planned on.  I am 74 and she told me she is going to become a widow prematurely.    I am grateful that she is not trying to destroy me the way some women do when getting a divorce.  Hugs to you too.  Donna
    • Jackie C.
      Eh, close enough. 😋   Makes me cold just thinking about it.   Hugs!
    • Aidan5
      haha I wear jeans sometimes but mostly shorts, my legs don't get cold and I have gym first period. Everyone calls me stereotypical heterosexual!! Clearly not the complete case haha
    • Jackie C.
      You really don't. Seriously, women dress for other women. As long as you look like you're clean and take a little pride in your appearance, you're good. It might be different now, but when I was your age peacocking just got you funny looks.   OK, the shorts are a little weird. It's freaking cold out. At least it is here.   Hugs!
    • Carolyn Marie
      Yes, it can be intense, especially the lip.  Hopefully the clinic is giving you some soothing gel to use for afterwards.  It helps reduce the incidence of acne, which I developed during my treatments.  Unfortunately I can no longer recall the name of the product.   Carolyn Marie
    • Aidan5
      wo-  Maybe I should look into fashion myself! I am all hoodies and shorts! I also wear blacked out nike shoes so I need some fashion beat into me haha
    • Jani
      As a woman, how does she make ends meet?  I understand that some of these are in deed silly when you step back a bit.  But it does show the level of misunderstanding people have about transgender folks!  All of those questions would seem weird if asked to her, but I totally get her point.  I think it will be a nice visit where you can dispel any and all rumors  (and show off your dust free home!)   As to whether she missed something way back when; well they do say love is blind!     Jani    
    • MaryMary
      Yes. For the situation where I can't avoid and can't run away from I have my handy collection of scars.
    • Ronin82
      When I was an unhappy female, I realized how vulnerable I was so I've studied Martial Arts for the last 16 years, some brutal styles and some very passive ones. My go-to is still the brutal styles, but I'm glad I have more gentle tools in my toolbox so I can defend myself without going too far. I used to have my CHL, but I let it lapse when my suicidality was super-active. Now, I'm concerned that my MH diagnoses could result in unfavorable litigation should I ever have to pull my weapon, so I haven't pursued renewing my permit. I do, however, ALWAYS have a large knife in my pocket specifically for defense situations. Now that I'm physically turning into the guy I always felt I was, I'm finding that the NEED to be so on edge about my safety is diminishing, although security concerns will always be a way of life for me.   In addition to being able to handle myself physically, I'm also trained in confrontation psychology and Verbal Judo. Its always best to be able to talk your way out of sketchy situations than to let things escalate to the physical. As stated above, the BEST strategy is to STAY OUT of the situation in the first place!!
    • VickySGV
      I am no longer afraid of being out at my meetings -- I say no longer for good reason -- but no longer is true. We have gifts to bring to the Recovery Tables that it does take us a while to realize.  We are different than the others (Chapter 3 reading); we have had to become scrupulously honest is ways that make other's pale by comparison because ours MUST BE in our hearts or we have no chance.  We even do the Steps in our Transition Journey in many ways.  Our spirituality and images of our Higher Power are different than a Cis person's, but they show the AA principal of "God as we understand (him, her, they) God just a little more brightly in the face of how religions treat us just as many treat recovering addicts of all sorts.  Explore your Transition and sobriety together and apart -- if you can that is -- or live them as your whole life.  I am at 11 years both sober (this time) and OUT and free.  It is fun and helps our AA friends in their paths.
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