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  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!


  1. Site Help

    1. Questions and Answers

      Found a bug?  Feature not working as it should?  Have a question about how to use the forums, a resource on the site, or the chat rooms?  This is the place to get help.


      This is not a forum to ask transition, hormone, or other questions.  It is for questions about the website and technical issues.

  2. Issue-Specific Support Forums

    1. Suicide Prevention

      Most transgender people have attempted suicide at least once in their lives. If you have, please lend your support here to those who are having a bad time now. Suicide is never the answer. If you are suicidal, call the Trans Lifeline at (877) 565-8860 in the US or (877) 330-6366 in Canada, or log in to our live chat room and ask to speak with a crisis moderator.

    2. Alcohol Abuse Support Forum

      A support forum for those who have problems with alcohol.

    3. Drug Abuse Support Forum

      A forum to get help and support if you have drug issues.

    4. Sexual Abuse and Assault Support Forum

      If you have ever been the victim of sexual abuse, molestation, violent sexual assault, or other sexual violation, you will find help and support here.

    5. Cutting and Self-Harm Support Forum

      Cutting and other forms of self-harm are an epidemic among transgender teens. This is a support and prevention forum to discuss issues related to these topics.

    6. Eating Disorders Support Forum

      A forum to discuss and get support if you have - or think you have - an eating disorder such as anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder, or compulsive over-eating.

    7. Victims of Hate Crimes and Violence

      This is a forum to discuss hate and violent crimes against transgender people. It is also a place for victims to talk about what happened to them and gain help and support. Nearly 95% of crimes against us are never reported. If you are a victim, please report it here.

  3. General Transgender Forums

    1. General Forum

      You may discuss any general topic here.  Religion and politics discussions must be held in their appropriate forums only.

    2. Introductions Forum

      Welcome!  Tell us about yourself!

    3. Military Veterans and Active-Duty Service Members

      A place for transgender military veterans and active-duty service members to discuss experiences, benefits, and laws that affect us.

    4. Coming Out

      A place to discuss coming out to family, friends, and co-workers.

    5. Research Studies

      From time to time, TransPulse approves academic research studies to solicit input from our community.  Information on these studies will be posted here.

    6. Member Poetry

      You may post your transgender-related poetry here.  Any poetry posted must be your own and any copyright held must be held by you.  Copyright infringements will be removed as soon as a moderator becomes aware of it, without notice.

  4. Transition Support Forums

    1. General Transition Issues

      This is a dual-gender forum for both FtMs and MtFs. Issues discussed here affect both groups, such as the WPATH Standards of Care.

    2. Therapy and Therapists

      Forum to discuss therapy and its effects.

    3. What Am I? I'm Not Sure.

      New to the site?  Not sure of your identity?  You are not alone.  This is a forum without judgment.  Ask your questions without fear.

    4. Androgyne Forums

      Androgyny is marked by characteristics of both genders resulting in a non-gendered or gender-neutral appearance.

    5. Crossdresser Discussions

      A discussion group for crossdressers.

    6. Female to Male (FtM) Discussions

      A place to discuss topics related to transitioning from female to male.

    7. Male to Female (MtF) Discussions

      A place to discuss issues related to transitioning from male to female.

    8. Intersex Discussions

      An intersex individual is a person (or individual of any unisex species) who is born with genitalia and/or secondary sexual characteristics of indeterminate sex, or which combine features of both sexes.

    9. 153
    10. Passing As Your Target Gender

      A discussion forum about passing as your true gender.

    11. Hormone Replacement Therapy

      A place to discuss hormone replacement therapy and its effects.

    12. Real Life Test Discussions

      A place to discuss transition: legal, workplace, name change, driver's license issues, and more. Tips and tricks on getting through a year or two as another gender.

    13. Transgender Surgeries

      The place to talk about gender affirming surgeries you've had or are planning to have, get physician recommendations, and more.

    14. Post-Op Discussions

      A place to discuss specific issues or general living after undergoing sex reassignment surgery.

    15. Transgender Issues

      A forum for discussion of general transgender issues.

    16. WPATH Standards of Care

      A place to discuss the existing standards of care and how they apply to us.

    17. Health Issues

      This forum is a place to discuss the various aches, pains, and other complaints we all have.  Please avoid playing doctor or applying your diagnosis or treatment to other members' situations - only a visit to a qualified health care professional can determine the right course of treatment.

    18. Diet and Exercise

      Many people understand that it is difficult to lose weight after starting hormones.  This a forum to discuss diet and exercise during and after medical transition.

    19. Fashion

      A place to discuss fashion for all members, including clothing questions, sizing, and more.

    20. Beauty

      Discuss beauty and cosmetics tips and tricks here.

  5. Career and Workplace Issues

    1. Job Search

      Searching for work is one of the biggest challenges faced by the transgender community.  Here you can ask for advice on the process.

    2. Academia

      If you're a student or if you work in the education field, this is the forum to discuss issues surrounding your work.

    3. Corporate and Office Environments

      This forum is a catch-all for the nine-to-fivers, whether you're an administrative assistant, an executive, or anywhere in between.

    4. Health Care and Social Services

      If you work in health care, social services, hospice, or another related industry, your workplace questions can be addressed here.

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    5. Law Enforcement and Emergency Response

      Law enforcement and corrections officers, firefighters, EMS employees, dispatchers, and others who work in emergency response can use this forum to discuss their workplace issues.

      • No posts here yet
    6. Service and Hospitality Industries

      Retail, food service, restaurant, hotel, and other service industry employees can find help with their workplace issues here.

    7. Other Fields

      If your career field doesn't have a specific category above, you can get advice on workplace issues here.

  6. News, Activism, Politics, and Events

    1. News

      This is the place to discuss news topics that affect our community. Discussions related to politics and activism should be posted here as well. This is also the place to list upcoming conferences and other gatherings.

    2. Uplifting News

      A place for news and events that lift the spirits.

    3. Politics

      Discussion forum for political topics, both general and specific to the transgender community.

    4. Transgender Activism

      Transgender activism and protests.

    5. Events, Conferences, and Gatherings

      Events and conferences of interest to the trans community.

  7. Parents, Family, and Friends of Transgender Individuals

    1. Parents of Transgender Children Support Forum

      A place for parents of transgender kids to discuss their problems and concerns.

    2. Family and Friends of Transgender People

      A place for partners, wives, husbands, significant others, friends, and family of transgender people to discuss their concerns and get advice.

  8. Spirituality

    1. Buddhism


    2. Christianity

      Christianity, all sects.

    3. Mormonism


    4. Hinduism


    5. Islam


    6. Judaism


    7. Two-Spirit

      Two-Spirit faiths, both Native American and other.

    8. Wicca


    9. Other Faiths

      Other religions and spiritual beliefs.

    10. Non-Deistic Spirituality

      Non-deistic spirituality.

  9. Entertainment

    1. Movies

      Discuss and review movies.  Nothing beyond an "R" rating.

    2. Television

      What do you - or don't you - like on TV, cable, and streaming services?

    3. Jokes and Humor

      Jokes and humor. Keep it clean. No ethnic or other derogatory jokes. What makes you laugh?

    4. Games and Gaming

      Board games, card games, video games - you name it.  What do you play?

    5. Books

      Books and book reviews, favorite authors, favorite genres, and more.

    6. Videos

      A place for your YouTube and other video links.  PG13 or below.  No underwear shots.  People must be fully clothed.  Instructional videos related to the trans community should also be posted here.

    7. Music

      What sort of music do you - or don't you - enjoy?

    8. Artwork

      This is for your artwork, not someone else's copyrighted art.  Because of bandwidth limits, you should use the insert image option and link to the image on your Photobucket, Imgur, or other storage account, or your own web space.  Images uploaded to the forum will be deleted.  Images must be site friendly / age-suitable or they will be deleted.

    9. Gadgets and Tech

      This is a place to discuss the ever-changing landscape of technology.

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  • Recent Posts

    • SusanMtF
      Great news on your big decision,  I think if you talk to one or two people first, the news would probably spread to your other family mambers before you could see them in person. I agree with Janinthat Skype would probably be the next best thing. But take my advice with a grain of salt because I have only come out to my wife so I have very little experience I actually going through with it.  I wish you the best in your decision.    SusanMtF
    • Jani
      Best advice ever!    Jani
    • Jani
      Hello Maid in Bedlam,   After two years on E you certainly have changed some.  Do you have any older photos you can look at to compare?  I kept a photo log during my first few years and the change was subtle but marked.  I look in the mirror now and don't recognize the old me, yet close friends and family do.  Lately I've been hearing that I look like my mom and specifically one of my sisters.    I'm a B also but I've always been lean so I kind of expected this.  As far as curves go, not all women are curvy, so don't beat yourself up over this.  I will ask though, how is your diet?  We don't need the same old caloric intact as we age and certainly not when on estrogen.  I used to eat what wanted without issue, but now I have to moderate or the "poochiness" (my spouses word) creeps up on my waist.     You say you're living stealth and no one knows so something is working for you.  We are our own worse critics, seeing things others never do.  I would't fret.  Let go your old notion of who you were and embrace the current you.  You'll be much happier.    Cheers, Jani
    • Carolyn Marie
      http://www.kcur.org/post/four-transgender-people-sue-kansas-right-change-their-birth-certificates#stream/0     Carolyn Marie
    • Jani
      I told my sister who lives nearby in person.  Another I used FaceTime (kinda, sorta, in person).  The last one was by email since she was far away and rather hard to reach at times.   I flew to where my parents live to tell them in person.  After that the news trickled out to aunts and uncle, nieces and nephews, and cousins.     There is nothing like "one on one" with news like this.  FaceTime (or Skype) would be the next best thing since you can see their faces and hear their voices to gauge the "real" reaction that you never get with just a phone call or email.     All my best,
    • Michelle F
      Wow...! Gabapentin is like a sledgehammer with terrible mood swings and benzodiazepines hit me like pure methamphetamines. I have PTSD and I'm intersex.    Back in the early 90s a court ordered paternal DNA test was taken. I was proved not to be the Father. But; what was discovered is I'm XX/XY. I have all of the human genetic markers. This is why my Docs all say I am responding so rapidly ito my HRT protocols. I've only been doing HRT now for just under 7 months.    I am seeing my shrink this week. I'm going to mention this test to him and see if it's available here!   Thanks for this Dev!  
    • Susan
      So I have kinda a dilemma. I want to tell my family about being transgender and I want to do it in person but my family does not live close to me. In fact they all live in other States and I can't afford to in and see them. Does anyone think it is appropriate or good to call each one on the phone to come out to them or should I wait til I can see them in person? Everyone's feedback is welcome but I know I will have to make the choice. Thanks all and hugs! Susan
    • BrandiBri
      You look marvelous, darling!  As I look at pictures of myself from even a few weeks ago, I can see differences, but most of the time when I look on the mirror all I see is the old me staring back. There are times ,though, when I see my older sister looking back at me. I have been on hormones for 13 months now and I have sprouted into b cups. I hope to end up with c or maybe a close d.
    • SugarMagnolia
      I had no idea you'd done that Kirsten. You DO hide your light under a bushel at times! Well done. ❤️
    • SugarMagnolia
      Very true, Jani. I took it as easy as I could, but am a little sore today. Of course, my wife is a similar size and was doing all the same things as me, so it's a fair partnership. 🙂   The good news is that everything fit in storage and the house is looking good. Fingers crossed for a buyers bidding war!
    • Dev
      @VickySGV This test covers every currently prescribed psychiatric medication on the market, so hopefully it will be helpful.  There are three mood stabilizers that don't currently appear to interact with genetics at all - gabapentin, Topamax, and lithium.  I've taken gabapentin and Topamax as they're also used off-label for migraine prophylaxis.  The gabapentin was a disaster with mood interactions for me and the Topamax just didn't do diddly.  As with everything else, YMMV.  
      @Kirsten Stimulants typically prescribed for ADHD are also covered in this report.  Eight different meds are listed and it looks like they're all classified a bit differently, so gene interactions will vary.  If benzodiazepines are indicated for PTSD, you'll find those in the results for this test, too.
    • Kirsten
      That’s amazing! Thank you so much for this information. I’m not sure that it’s available here but maybe. My son has adhd and ptsd and maybe even a touch of ODD as well and we struggle with his meds and have for years. This could really help him so much. Thank you again.   
    • MaryMary
    • Kirsten
      I used them a lot when I was younger, but that was well before I was out. And I know for me it was just a way to hook up. I don’t know how much that’s changed in the past 15 years, but something tells me if anything it’s more for hookups.  I still think meeting someone in person is the way to go. Out somewhere. Doing something you both happen to share and enjoy. Idk. Maybe I’m just old. Lol. 🤷🏻‍♀️
    • Kirsten
      Thanks. Keto diet and cardio. 252 pounds at the highest to 171 at the lowest. I’m back to mid 180s now almost 9 months later. But I like my weight for the most part.  The best part of all of it wasn’t the weight loss though. It was finding myself and breaking out of my shell. I learned how to be okay with who I was instead of what everyone else wanted from me. 
    • VickySGV
      Hmmm-- I have two family members ( a mother and adult daughter) with psychiatric problems and  a history of medication roulette with twice the numbers on a standard wheel.  I will relay this to them for consideration by there Psych staffs.   Thank you.
    • Dev
      Hola!   My mind was thoroughly blown today.  This is something that could have implications for many of our members, so I wanted to ramble a bit about it.  I'm sure all of us with psychiatric issues have had experience with a doctor prescribing something that either doesn't work or actually makes things worse.  One of the old adages I've spouted countless times in my ~20 years of suicide prevention work is that everyone reacts differently to each psychiatric medication.  What works for one person won't necessarily help another.  I've always called it more of an art than a science.   Recently, science has taken a huge step toward controlling this kind of thing.  Geneticists have been studying the MTHFR gene and have found that the meds most likely to help someone can be found by analyzing that person's DNA structure.  This particular gene can, in one way or another, tell doctors if you should take a certain medication as it's usually prescribed, if it will have reduced or no effect, or if it will hit you like a Mack truck doing 80 on the expressway.  A few months ago I gave a sample (it's done by cheek swab) to my psychiatrist, and today I sat down with him to discuss the results.   This test is scary, it's so accurate.  It called out every medication I tried that didn't work as being genetically incompatible with me.  It identified the drugs I've tried that sent me into overdrive because I am genetically predisposed to being really, really sensitive to them.  Aside from the psychiatric medications available, it also pointed out that when I was given a benzodiazepine or any opioid painkiller in the past, I had to be given enough to knock out an elephant because I'm genetically resistant to their effects.  (Opioids also give me a nasty hangover, and whenever I'm offered one in the ER the doctors are genuinely confused when I decline.)   However, this test was also able to show that my body doesn't process synthetic folic acids well, if it does at all.  My psychiatrist said that could well have a negative impact on both my diabetes and my migraines, and suggested that I get a full medical DNA report to discuss with my primary doctor to see if there are other ways my genes are getting in my way.   I'm posting this specifically for the psychiatric benefits involved, but those of us with medical concerns might want to consider it as well.  In the US, the test is called the GeneSight MTHFR analysis, run by Assurex Health.  If it's available in your area, your psychiatrist will know how to get it done for you.
    • Sydneyblue
      WOw thats amazing going from size 14 to 8 
    • MaryMary
      I have my own feelings about this. Although it's more dangerous for trans people it's still quite safe if you take some basic measures like telling the other you are trans, meeting in a public space the first dates, etc. Every trans woman takes a risk but I don't think it's enough of a risk to avoid dating completely. I think that the more you hang with the trans community, the more you are aware of every little injustice. It adds up on a national level but here in my local city 1 or 2 trans woman had really bad encounters out of thousands. On that 1 or 2 bad encounters to my knowledge none were fatal.   I feel that the moment you are far enough from the beauty norm dating becomes a lot harder. I have cisgender woman who are my friends that have a very hard time finding someone because they have other differences. I'm not the most active person on dating sites but I've had 3 dates total and 1 guy was ready to go further with me but he was not interesting enough for my taste, one was not sure and the other person was a girl and was far too independant for my tastes. The main problem for me is to manipulate the system to reject those who don't fit (transphobic and the such) and after that finding people who are serious and what to find love. That's the harder part for me, a lot of guys go on those sites and just want sex. It becomes very hard to find someone in the end but I know for a fact that it's hard for everybody that's different. A lot of guys fancy themselves with a beautyfull 10/10 blond woman who's intelligent. Are a lot of people interested in a trans woman? A blind woman? A little person? A woman who is 300 lbs? Dating is hard and is discriminatory for everybody.   Anectdote : I was chating with a man who was very open minded and was bisexual and had already had relations with trans woman. We talk and talk and at one point he said : "do you practive BDSM?" . I said : "no, it's not my style" then he said : " oh, I'm so sorry, I don't want to date somebody who don'T share this sexual preference" . I mean.... it was discriminatory... against non BDSM people. lol The number of possible discrimination when dating is stagering. lol It's part of the game I think.    
    • Cursedbook
      My ex and his wife got a divorce shortly before we went to court for custody. I couldn't live with myself if I gave up my daughter. I wouldn't have a chance in court. A chronically homeless trans person with no job stability has no chance of getting full custody.       Thank you so much.
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