A Man In A Dress

[Guest yvonne]

Hi sisters,

It appears to me that there are far too many of us that want "overnight delivery" for our transition.

The plain and simple fact is, that without years of training, we're just a "man in a dress".

Let me elaborate. Genetic girls have to learn a lot. It seems to me that pre-pubescent girls don't necessarily act or talk substantially different that comparable boys.

After all, as boys, we had to learn how to walk (strut) and how to talk from trying to fit in with the boy crowd. We imitated what other boys did as a means of acceptance (well, most of us did, mostly from either expectations of others or self denial as to who we really were--don't forget not wanting to get the stuff beat out of us)...

Girls had to learn, too. I spent the day with several women whom I respect a great deal and I observed carefully their mannerisms, gestures and behavior. I learned a lot.

I once read that the best way for voice training is to watch the movie "valley girls" over and over. It's dawned on me that girls have to learn their speech and mannerisms from watching and imitating other girls.

Some of our more experienced sisters (Thank You) have said the same thing--watch women our age, see how they dress, speak and act and work to emulate it.

Genetic girls all spent their formative years learning what they know--so why should WE be any different? Do we think there's some "Express Overnight Service" that we can pay extra for to bypass years of training? (Send checks to me, personally, and I'll guarantee results).

We need to realize that there's a lot more to this than hormones and surgery. It ain't that easy--or that fast.

I'm workin' on it and thanking all those who've gone before to give me training and tips.

Thank you sisters!

Hugs,

Yvonne

[Guest angie]

Genetic girls have a long head start,like a lifetime.

I raised two lovely women,three if you count my ex wife,which I do.

Girls start their training as soon as mom has them potty trained.

How to sit,act,walk,talk like a lady.They emulate their mothers and

her friends.And as they mature,they imitate their friends and peers also.

I know from raising my girls,that girls act like girls naturally,it seems

to come hard wired.

While many,if not most,had to live an opposite lifestyle of projecting our birth

gender.And this was learned to combat our natural feminine tendencies.

I know my daddy did his best to instill how to act like a man.When everything

in me said to act like the girl I am.We have a long way to go to catch up with

genetic girls umhm.But with great patience and lots and lots of practice, we

do eventually catch up to our genetic sisters.

Angie

[Guest Joanna Phipps]

the beatles song that goes ... LOng and winding road seems appropriate.. it is a long road and not an easy one

[Guest madelane]

Having read through this thread I sometimes wonder if we all don't try to hard to be girls and thereby end up overdo the 'girly' stuff and so actually parody them. When this happens we do stand out very much like the drag queens......I know a number of women who although obviously female with children etc who can strut with the best of the guys, don't cross their legs everytime they sit down but straddle....oh all manner of supposidly manly actions.

I have always been rather foppish to use and English term or more feminine, enough to be called THOSE names and in fact my wife married me because of that feminity as she disliked and still dislikes the macho man with their heavy handed attitude.

I do belive that if one is just oneself without being self concious your true femininty will be apparent as against something contrived.

I was at the mall sometime ago with bike jacket and helmit and overheard a little boy ask his mother after staring at me for some time, 'Mommy is that a boy or a girl?' And I am a wrinkly old bat. You just have to love their honesty!!!!

Love

Madelane

[Guest angie]

What my experience has been,

Is that the ones of us who dress over the top,in very feminine styles

everywhere they go,are the ones that get made the fastest.By dressing

as an everyday girl,meaning what ever style suits you,we tend to blend

in,by staying away from constant dresses,skirts and high heels.I know I

watched my ex roomie get outed with a quickness,by presenting so dang

feminine and frilly,even when just going to the grocery store.Being ultra

femme will get you made easier than you think,because you draw attention

to yourself instead of blending in.

Angie

[Guest Joanna Phipps]

My philosophy of being just another woman on the sidewalk tends to keep me dressing fairly casually most of the time. Occasionally I will put on a skirt but most of the time its a nice blouse and pair of slacks, usually with a pair of tennies.

[Paula ult]

When i was first starting out i would go to the mall and observe what woman my age wore, how they moved and talked, it help me blend in, at first i was afraid that people were staring or pointing at me, but that never happened and my confidence grew to where it is now, i go everywhere and i think of myself as any other woman doing their shopping etc.

Paula

[Guest AshleyRF]

What my experience has been,

Is that the ones of us who dress over the top,in very feminine styles

everywhere they go,are the ones that get made the fastest.By dressing

as an everyday girl,meaning what ever style suits you,we tend to blend

in,by staying away from constant dresses,skirts and high heels.I know I

watched my ex roomie get outed with a quickness,by presenting so dang

feminine and frilly,even when just going to the grocery store.Being ultra

femme will get you made easier than you think,because you draw attention

to yourself instead of blending in.

Angie

Absolutely correct.

I found transition really easy other than the problems I created for myself. I've had no problems from the general public so far. I just try to look as natural as I can. Nothing fancy of flashy.

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi Yvonne

Indeed, many gender mannerisms are learned ( makes you think doesn't it). You are so right when you say that it does not happen overnight. To pass, you have to work at it for quite some time. Like all things.. practice makes perfect Simply watch and learn from your peers. In time, it all becomes very natural.

Love

Brenda

[Guest N. Jane]

...that girls act like girls naturally,it seems to come hard wired.

Indeed! So if you expect to BECOME a girl, recognize that that old wiring has got to go and you HAVE to start over - that means letting go of all your preconceived ideas and thinking you know and realizing that you do NOT know. Immerse yourself in the company of women and keep your mouth shut (because you know NOTHING) and you WILL learn.

If you are going to pretend to be a woman on stage or superficially, continue copying what women do. Otherwise, start over again.