Post Thanksgiving

[Guest NatashaJade]

So I sat and ate my turkey and tried very hard not to speak with anyone about anything that might upset me or provoke a reaction in me at all. I stared at my hands and wondered if everyone in my family noticed the lack of hair on them. I went to the bathroom three times to avoid crying in front of everyone when my tactic to avoid emotional conversations didn't work as well as I would have liked. Mostly, I realized I am really really not ready to tell any of these people, my family, that I am a woman.

I guess I'm too much of a coward right now...

I hope you all had a wonderful day.

luv

Gin

[Guest]

Many think that family gatherings are the best time to come out. We deal with the effects in the crisis rooms. Usually the family splits with some supportive and others not. If you are prepared for the negatives it gets everyone with one declaration. More people have better luck tackling family members or friends one at a time. While a few do have success with coming out to groups in person or in a letter the personal approach works better in my opinion. When you are ready you'll come out.

Laura

[Paula ult]

So I sat and ate my turkey and tried very hard not to speak with anyone about anything that might upset me or provoke a reaction in me at all. I stared at my hands and wondered if everyone in my family noticed the lack of hair on them. I went to the bathroom three times to avoid crying in front of everyone when my tactic to avoid emotional conversations didn't work as well as I would have liked. Mostly, I realized I am really really not ready to tell any of these people, my family, that I am a woman.

I guess I'm too much of a coward right now...

I hope you all had a wonderful day.

luv

Gin

Gin hon,

My partner and i had several friends over and this was the best Thanksgiving i have had in 4 years since my mother passed.

Like Laura said you will know when the time is right, and i agree one on one is best for family and friends, when i told my stepfather i did it face to face, it took a few months working with my therapist till i was able to screw up the courage to tell him and it went well, he is really is supportive, friends i have known 15 - 30 years i went over to their home and also told them face to face, most thanked me for doing it that way, one couple thought i was going to try to sell them a timeshare, for those too far away, mainly my extended family, i sent letters, i got positive responses from my stepsister and several relatives, the rest are unknown what their feelings are.

For you to move ahead in transition you will need to tell them and others at some point but since you just started hormones you have some time before changes become noticeable, please take this advise, others gave it to me and i am passing it down, only tell those that need to know, the cashier at the supermarket does not need to know.

Telling others did get easier each time.

Paula

[Guest julia_d]

Laura speaks with wisdom. The last thing a family gathering needs is upset and drama. Guaranteed to make a mountain out of a molehill, especially as alcohol is usually involved and emotions are running high. Last time I saw both my parents together was a new years eve, and I ended up walking back home (4 miles) on my own at just before 11. My father took exception to my clothes, even though they had both known for years I am trans.

No hesitation

No regrets

No sympathy

No remorse..

what is will be.

treat relatives on a "need to know" basis.

[Guest NatashaJade]

Thanks to all who have replied. I would never dream of spilling at a full family affair. There is so much drama in my family as it is, I wouldn't dream of pulling focus. I just kept worrying that I would subconsciously do something or reveal something because I really want to get it out there but it is definitely not the time for disclosure.

Tomorrow I'm getting together with my best friends before heading home to the Zone and, again, the timing is not right, but I'd love to feel confident and comfortable and courageous enough to let them in on the astounding truth of my life. I'm sure it will come someday...hopefully sooner than later.

Love you all and thanks for being here.

Gin

[Guest doodle]

I can understand how you felt. I had to partners family they are red necks and ex cops. We don't go often. I never want to go. everyone knows we are an odd couple. She is butch and I look and act fem but she has me pass as a guy when we go. I'm not that bad at it once I get in to the act. . I wear a binder. I hate that thing. The men do try to be nice to me . I try and man-up and fit in for her sake. they ( her family) are so happy she' s with a guy? I'm doing the best I can then I start wishing I was a normal guy and start drinking. They all drink a lot so I'm fitting in even more. I get drunk and fall asleep than itis over with . It happens every time

Kelly

[Guest Sherry7620]

I fondly remember my first outed family get together. It was Turkey Day too & Mom whispered he looks like a sleeper while I hung my coat. At dinner I was openly mocked in an obvious backhanded manner. However, I was more focused on all the good food. I guess I'm pretty jaded, cuz I sure enjoyed that meal!