Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Just Begining


Guest Sarah Michelle

Recommended Posts

Guest sarah f

I am new to this site and just begining my journey to possibly fullfilling my dream of transitioning MTF. I have always dreamed about this since I wan a young child. I always thought to myself that I should have been born a girl. I have tried to live as a male but continue to struggle with it everyday. I am married and have 3 kids but still to this day I think to myself this is not me. I want what has always been in my mind and heart but struggle with what will happen with my family if I make the transition. I don't want to lose everyone but this is what I know I have to do at this point in my life. I am in my 30's and don't want to waste anymore time than I already have. I hope to talk to some users to help me with my struggles that I have had with coming to this decision in my life.

Sincerely,

Sarah

Link to comment

Hi Sarah, and welcome to the Playground!

You're at a scary point of transition, but you've got lots of good company here. We've definitely got members who've transitioned and been able to keep their relationships with their family members. I'm sure there will be some folks along who can offer you more concrete advice than I can, but for now, feel free to jump in and start posting. I'm glad to see you here, and I'm looking forward to seeing you around the forums!

Best,

Pól

Link to comment
Guest ~Brenda~

Hi Sarah and Welcome!

Dear, it is really good that you have joined Laura's. I know that you are worried about your marriage and your kids regarding your transitioning. No marriage is the same. For me and some others, we ended up divorced. Even divorced, my relationship with my kids remained strong. For others, after coming out, the marriage remained intact. Each of us have a unique experience regarding coming out to our spouses. All I can suggest now is that you hang with us and get to understand yourself better before you make any moves.

Love

Brenda

Link to comment
  • Admin

Hi, Sarah, and welcome to Laura's!

Lets see, I do believe I have some of Sally's cookies left, and how about a nice cup of hot cocoa and a seat in the Member's Lounge? That better? Good!

Honey, Brenda is right, you really have come to the right place. There is so much information here, and so many wonderful, supportive people.

I'm one of the older "matrons" at 55, and I'm just beginning my transition. I have a wife and a 16 year old child, so I understand all too well the

trauma of starting this journey. It is nothing to be taken lightly, but it can be done and has been done. Marriages can survive - my spouse

has been supportive and loving since I came out to her in August, but the future is, of course, uncertain. So please don't assume that your

family will be lost to you. It doesn't have to be that way.

Our best advice is to seek out a gender therapist if you have one close by. There are other options if you do not. Please read through the forums,

ask your questions, learn, and make friends. We will be here to support you all the way.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment

Hello Sarah,

Welcome to Laura"s. We are a friendly bunch of folks here who

have amassed a huge amount of info re Trans issues and of course, are

ready and willing to help and advise . So , have a look around hun and

get to know a little about the Playground . I look forward to reading your

contributions. Luv,viv :)

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

Good morning, Sarah...

How are you?

Welcome to the Playground.

I know that you're going to love it here.

All of this can be very scary, your feelings, what to do, how to go about it....

It takes friends and support and that's what you'll find here.

So, I suggest that you start reading and posting and everyone will help and support you.....OK?

It's so nice to have you!

HUGGS!

Donna Jean

Link to comment

Welcome to Laura's, Sarah! You will find incredible understanding and support here no matter what issues you are dealing with and no matter where you are in your journey. I have found Laura's a place to find validation as you will too.

Hugs--Ricka

Link to comment

Hi Sarah ,

<<hug>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)

We have MTF meetings-Mon & Sat 9pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

Link to comment
Guest Amanda joan

Hello Sarah,

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

I am on the same path as you a few steps ahead, so maybe I can help you along. We are all here to help and support each other. You risk allot coming out and starting to transition. It is a hard place to be. I have been strugling with these emotions for the last few months. Take your time to understand what is important to you. Plan some simple steps to take that will make you feel good about what you are doing. Grown out your hair or shave you face clean. Simple steps to make you feel like you are moving forward. Having a therapists is key to getting all your feeling delt with. Be honest with you wife and help her to understand what you are going through. You don't have to give up everyone you love to transition. You will have to help them transition right along with you.

So let's talk some more soon.

Peace & Love Amanda

Link to comment
Guest Michele H
Hi, Sarah, and welcome to Laura's!

I'm one of the older "matrons" at 55, and I'm just beginning my transition.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

I wasn't feeling THAT old until now - if 55 qualifies for "Older Matrton" - what about 63? Really ancient crone? Seariously thou, there are people here of all ages -Welcome

Link to comment
Guest sarah f
Hi, Sarah, and welcome to Laura's!

Lets see, I do believe I have some of Sally's cookies left, and how about a nice cup of hot cocoa and a seat in the Member's Lounge? That better? Good!

Honey, Brenda is right, you really have come to the right place. There is so much information here, and so many wonderful, supportive people.

I'm one of the older "matrons" at 55, and I'm just beginning my transition. I have a wife and a 16 year old child, so I understand all too well the

trauma of starting this journey. It is nothing to be taken lightly, but it can be done and has been done. Marriages can survive - my spouse

has been supportive and loving since I came out to her in August, but the future is, of course, uncertain. So please don't assume that your

family will be lost to you. It doesn't have to be that way.

Our best advice is to seek out a gender therapist if you have one close by. There are other options if you do not. Please read through the forums,

ask your questions, learn, and make friends. We will be here to support you all the way.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

Thank You for your support and hope you have an easy transition yourself.

Link to comment
Guest sarah f
Hello Sarah,

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

I am on the same path as you a few steps ahead, so maybe I can help you along. We are all here to help and support each other. You risk allot coming out and starting to transition. It is a hard place to be. I have been strugling with these emotions for the last few months. Take your time to understand what is important to you. Plan some simple steps to take that will make you feel good about what you are doing. Grown out your hair or shave you face clean. Simple steps to make you feel like you are moving forward. Having a therapists is key to getting all your feeling delt with. Be honest with you wife and help her to understand what you are going through. You don't have to give up everyone you love to transition. You will have to help them transition right along with you.

So let's talk some more soon.

Peace & Love Amanda

Thank You for your support. I will enjoy talking to each and everyone in this site as I know this is not easy for most of us.

Link to comment
Guest sarah f
Hi Sarah and Welcome!

Dear, it is really good that you have joined Laura's. I know that you are worried about your marriage and your kids regarding your transitioning. No marriage is the same. For me and some others, we ended up divorced. Even divorced, my relationship with my kids remained strong. For others, after coming out, the marriage remained intact. Each of us have a unique experience regarding coming out to our spouses. All I can suggest now is that you hang with us and get to understand yourself better before you make any moves.

Love

Brenda

Thank You, and I hope to be able to have a strong of relationship with my kids as you did after the change.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   1 Member, 0 Anonymous, 69 Guests (See full list)

    • Siobhan F
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      770.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,103
    • Most Online
      8,356

    BUGFIEND
    Newest Member
    BUGFIEND
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bobbijean
      Bobbijean
    2. Bryan
      Bryan
      (61 years old)
    3. jlw5ju
      jlw5ju
      (27 years old)
    4. ladykirabellum
      ladykirabellum
      (47 years old)
    5. Lizzie17
      Lizzie17
  • Posts

    • Ivy
      This is a fairly long video by Philosophy Tube,  (Abigail Thorne)  Discussing some of Judith Buttler's work and related stuff.   I wasn't sure where to post it, so if there is a better place, move it. 
    • KymmieL
      I have a fantastic therapist. She is so caring she has helped me open up so much. Unfortunately, She is ending her internship. Do to a hiring freeze at the VA she isn't going just go right into a position there.  My Endo is out of the Denver VA hospital. I haven't talked with her in probably 2 yrs. I am  looking to transfer providers and get back to seeing a GYN at the Cheyenne VA. 
    • Ladypcnj
      Trump thinks he's the chosen one.. chosen to do what?   
    • Ladypcnj
    • Birdie
      Shopping at the mall today and helping out at Torrid I excused myself to the restroom. The manager told me the restroom at JC Penny was much closer (I normally use the family restroom in the food court).   Upon arrival I discovered that JC Penny doesn't have a family restroom, it's either or.   The men's room was occupied with customers, and me going in with large breasts, long hair, and makeup was going to cause a stir, so I opted for the woman's room instead. I was the only one in the woman's room.    Texas state law does state that your must use the restroom that matches your chromosomes, and it's a misdemeanor to not do so, but it seemed to be the best choice (I really needed to go!)  
    • Ashley0616
    • ClaireBloom
      My avatar is from a T-shirt that I am just dying to buy.  Maybe soon....
    • Lydia_R
      I had some guy grab my butt on the ship.  I don't know how "real" it was, but I did not enjoy that at all.  Also did not enjoy the hazing I saw other people going through.  One person can only do so much to stop that when there are 10 people doing it.
    • Lydia_R
      Here is a legible copy (hopefully):    
    • Lydia_R
      I pulled this out of a stack of old military mementos yesterday.  I guess I didn't realize how cool this one was because I did so much of this kind of thing back then.    
    • Lydia_R
      This internet video thing is pretty amazing.  I'd call it Zoom, but there are other platforms out there.  I prefer Zoom over Teams because Zoom puts me and everyone else in the same picture.  I like seeing the whole group in one shot.  Teams of course is about having so many people that you can't get them in the shot, or is it?   Just saying that I have never met any of my counselors in person.  Doctors, of course I have and I am lucky there.  They are 3.5 miles from my house as is the main transgender surgery place in town.  I've been doing virtual visits with the medical doctors lately though.  It feels like once I became steady state, they don't need to interact with me physically that much.  I have enjoyed going into their office in my nice clothing.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I guess a lot depends on where you start and where you wanna end up.  For me, doing the "boy form" thing has come with disadvantages.  Smaller skeleton, thinner bones, and skinny/tiny everything.  I'll never be taken seriously.  I guess the advantage is that my way of blending in is just kind of confusing.  "Mommy, is that a boy or a girl?"    One of the biggest arguments for starting transition early in life is I think it gives a person a greater ability to pass.  My two MtF friends started early, and pass really well.  They never got to the larger bone structure, beard, deep voice stuff.  Me being intersex (which is more complicated) and not getting around to "boy form" until my 30's, my body size and features were pretty much set in stone.      You're lucky.  Some folks pay all that and more, even AFTER insurance.  One of my friends faced the choice last year - pay for her final year of college or pay for her meds.  She's taken a year off from college to work and save up money to finish.    My medical expenses have been more injury-related than therapy or medication   The state covered some of it with a fund for crime victims, insurance covered a lot, but there's ended up being a few thousand dollars spent out-of-pocket since 2022 to put me back together again.  I've never found a decent therapist, but my husband has a psych degree among other things, so I figure talking with him is almost as good.  I do have a good doctor, although I have to drive a long way to a big city to see her.  Mostly she takes a basic look at me, and writes another year's prescription.  Since I'm non-op and only using testosterone cream for a localized effect, its pretty simple stuff. 
    • Lydia_R
      I'm a tracker and I've paid for 100% of my transition costs out of pocket.  Counseling was a huge, huge part of my transition and well worth my money.  Not to be uppity about all of this.  I'm just sharing information I have because I have it and it may be useful for others.  Here is my analysis of my spending on transition over the last 2.5 years:   Medical Doctors and Blood Draws: $2,397 Counseling: $3,800 Medications (brand name): $2,702.85 Medications (generic): $485.39 Total: $9,385.24   I picked up on the internet early in transition that transition is a consumer activity.  I tend to agree with that.   This year (Jan - May 18th, 2024), I've spent: Medical Doctors: $102 Medications: $241.52 Total: $343.52   So I'm on a much more sustainable path with it.  I'm pretty happy with where I am with it, although I do still desire surgery and am nervous about how that will all unfold.  But my doctors have me on this steady state thing.  I could seek out other medications, but what I'm doing is good enough.  Oh, I'm missing something....  I did a bunch of electrolysis that didn't appear to have any effect.  I've always enjoyed shaving and I use pink shaving cream now (I've got some lipstick blond in me).  It's good enough.  Not sure if I'll do electro or laser in the future.  The need to shave my body has become less and less.  Before HRT, I was shaving my body weekly or even every 5 days.  Now it is more like 2-3 weeks.  Everyone's body hair is different.  My beard is very coarse and stiff while my body hair has been somewhat minimal and light.  It's nice to have smooth legs and not have to shave as much.   Counseling was $200/session.  I tried one or two counselors before I found one who resonated with where I really was.  When I was prescribed HRT, I didn't fill the prescription until 4 months later.  I had to take some time to decide that I really wanted to take on that lifetime financial commitment.  And of course the possibly negative health consequences too, but I think I was actually thinking more about the finances of it all.  Maybe 51%.   I did a lot of work to revitalize my career before jumping into medical transition.  I started counseling 3 months before I got the best paying job of my life.  The pressure of wanting to transition was so great that I couldn't wait any longer.  She was coming out.  Even though I had very little money, I splurged on some nice dresses and a full length mirror and then started counseling.  Sometimes you just have to move forward and hope for the best.  Other times it is better to wait and do some hard work.  The grace of it all..
    • Ivy
      And when the pressure is released it sucks in heat.  I had a regulator leaking and it was covered with ice.  It's how a heat pump works as well.   Why do they always pick names like this?  It's like the exact opposite of what it really is. I hate politics so much.  But I still have to follow it.
    • Lydia_R
      Wonderful!  This reminds me of a discussion I had with my brother a decade ago.  I said that things expand when they get hotter.  He said, no, they expand when they get colder.  And I had to think about that for a while.  The weird thing is that H20 is special in that when it reaches freezing, it expands.   The pressure makes the cold and then we see the condensation.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...