Hi, I'm Remus And I'm Australian/chocoholic/ftm.

[Remus]

Hi, everyone. I never know whether to gradually get to details or jump straight in, so...yeah. I'm Remus, I'm 22, FtM... Um... I heart coffee/chocolate/Earl Grey/Red Bull muchly and somehow always seem to have bad insomnia... I'm studying at uni, hate sport (how dreadfully unAustralian, oh the shame!), am a bit behind the times when it comes to music (Schubert rocks my socks), and love using ellipses like this...

And am also utterly hopeless at intros.

I never quite felt like I 'fit in' with the other girls at school, I always felt like there was just some inherent difference between us (though I was also usually shy of the boys, too, but I'm not sure if that was me or social boy-girl separation conditioning). I dreamt (both the sleep and daydream varieties) of being a boy from a young age, possibly 8 or 9, but certainly more or less every night by 11 or 12, and I thought I was a lesbian for a while, but then realised that lesbians - indeed most women - probably don't spend every night of their adolescence wanting to be boys, which I was by high school. Within the last few years, though, I started looking around and trying to figure out exactly *why* I should be wasting "the happiest years of my life" fantasising that I was a boy and planning my future out as a man, and then I found a website about 'Transgenderism', and I read it, and it all just *fit*. It may have complicated some things in my life, but at least I know (or so the therapist I'm seeing assures me) I'm not completely barmy, that there *is* an explanation for it and that there *are* ways to help it all.

I'm out to my close friends and family, who've all been great about it (some slightly moreso than others, but generally very supportive). I've still not decided if I want to transition or not - or, rather, I keep planning things based around transitioning ("When I'm transitioning...", "No, you can't do that if you're transitioning" etc.), and get very excited reading/hearing people's stories of their own transitions and imagine doing the same thing, but am never 100% certain about it - but I'm quite, quite over pretending to be a happy feminine make-up wearing woman. (No offence to the ladies out there, it just wasn't me).

Hmm, not sure if that's now too many details for an intro... I'm just *me*, an almost-man who forgets he has the appearance of a woman, and consequently is often rudely brought back down to Earth with a great resounding bump.

That's all I can think of at the moment (again, not sure if TMI, sorry).

So glad I found this place, there's nothing quite like talking with people who actually, properly understand it all.

Happy 2010, everyone.

Remus

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi Remus

Welcome to Laura's. I think your introduction was great!!!

So come right on in and make yourself right at home. I have got plenty of cocoa for you

Post to the forums!!!

Love

Brenda

[Guest Donna Jean]

So glad I found this place, there's nothing quite like talking with people who actually, properly understand it all.

Happy 2010, everyone.

Remus

Well, Hon...then you're in the perfect place!

Boy! How we understand!

Welcome to the Playground, Remus! I'm Donna Jean and I'd like to get you a slice of pizza and a cold drink to help make you feel welcome....OK?

Kick off your shoes and sit over here and make yourself all comfy.

Let me just get this out of the way quickly...please read the form rules (link at the top of most pages)...Thanks....

Oh, and we're a moderated site..that keeps it very safe for everyone!

So, just relax and some of the others will be by shortly to say "HI!"...OK?

Good...

It's so nice to have you!

HUGGS!

Donna Jean

[Carolyn Marie]

Hi, Remus, and welcome to the Playground.

No worries about whether you should or shouldn't transition. There is plenty of time to explore those issues. It sounds like you have a

pretty supportive group of people around you, and that helps a lot.

You'll find all the information you might need in our forums, and can meet lots of folks and have fun in our Chat Rooms too. Take the time

to look around, post any questions or comments you have, and you'll always receive a thoughtful reply.

Oh, and don't worry about your love of Shubert. There are a few of us around here with eclectic tastes. I like everything from Vivaldi to

Springsteen, Bach to the Rolling Stones, and some country and bluegrass thrown in for good measure.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest van-na]

Hi Remus,

<<curtsey>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We have FTM meetings -Mon & Fri 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna

[Guest sarah f]

Welcome to Laura's Remus. You definately found the perfect site to be on if you have questions. I am still new at this myself and have had a lot of responses from the loving people on this site. It helps to keep posting your questions as we will all try to help out.

Love,

Sarah F

[Guest Jean Davis]

Hey Remus

Welcome to the family. So nice to meet you.

That's all I can think of at the moment (again, not sure if TMI, sorry).

Correct me if I'm wrong but I think "TMI" means "To Much Information".

If I'm correct, don't worry about that honey, you can share all you like. We just love to hear from new people.

So just sit back, relax and work at wearing out a keyboard or two. I think Sally has already.

GBH (Great Big Hug) Just learned that one today.

LUV

Jean

[gennee]

Hi Remus and welcome to Laura's. I enjoyed reading your intro because parts of it are similar to my experience. I came out as a crossdresser 4 1/2 years ago. When I read about transgenderism it connected with me. Today I 'm an MTF transsexual (non-op). I don't plan on take taking hormones or having surgery but I've never felt happier in my life. I'm aslo a chocoholic .

Gennee

[Sally]

Welcome to the family Remus, I was wondering if there is a Romulus running around here anywhere.

Sorry, I am a bit eclectic myself in music, literature, art and life in general - if I were homeless I would be called insane, if I were rich I would be called eccentric but I am in between so I have settled on eclectic.

Now that you have received my introductory joke we can get serious.

If you have any questions feel free to ask, if you have any answers - please share and if you just need to talk to someone we are here.

We are all here to support each other, that is what families do.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Shane_82]

Welcome

~ Shane

[Guest Miss Aeryn]

What! An Australian who doesn't like sport! Stone the crows!

*dashes off to ring the Be Alert Not Alarmed Hotline... what... where is the fridge magnet? gah!*

Hello Remus and nah, never too much TMI hehe. It's good t hear you have support from close friends and family.

hugs,

Aeryn

[Remus]

Thanks everyone so very much, I've been on trans fora before but haven't visited any in a while, and I'd completely forgotten how nice it is to be surrounded by people, even if only on teh interwebz, who actually know what you're talking about and understand it all. It really is such a wonderful relief to have found this place, I'd been feeling quite lost before, but certainly not now.

Thank you all again! *hugs*

Remus

[Guest Pól]

I know I'm a bit late on this, but welcome, Remus!

[Guest DaleUK]

Hi Remus!

I'm Dale, and I'm a bit new on here too. So, welcome, fellow newbie!

I can get so much of what you said in your intro. I went through the "Maybe I'm a lesbian?" stage too, but, well, you know it's just not quite the right fit, don;t you? At least as far you can't ever wholeheartedly enter into the 'lesbian lifestyle' and that keeps you apart somewhat. Make sense??

One thing I have been really happy to see since entering Laura's ( lovely ) Playground is that there are others who, whether by choice or for reasons beyond their control, are not transitioning. I have medical issues that so far have proved a block to that and for so long I felt so cheated and depressed by that, not to mention thoroughly irked too, when others would get that " Oh well you can't be transgender/FTM then, can you, cos you'd have to transition ..." blah blah blah ( Hey, yes, someone else who likes to use ellipses! ) because quite frankly I didn;t have the information/support myself to realize what they were saying just was not true.

Anyway, hope to read more from you, Remus. Take it easy, dude. And uh, I hate sports!!! As a Scotsman, that kind of makes me a traitor and a thoroughly strange & suspicious thing too!

[Remus]

Lol cheers guys. If only the real world (and the rest of the internet, too) were as accepting as here.