Body Image

[Guest T2Logan]

I am FTM and in the process of transitioning. I am currently a senior in college as a sociology major and I am required to conduct a research project. I actually am very excited and interested in the topic. Little research has been done about homosexuals with regards to eating disorders, but there has been even less focused on transgendered individuals struggling with eating disorders. I believe we need to spread the word and knowledge that many transgendered individuals struggle greatly. Perhaps more knowledge could assist with treatment programs tailored for those that identify as trans.

My question is whether you have struggled with an eating disorder which you feel is strongly related to identifying as transgendered or not? There are multliple factors that go into the development of an eating disorder, but I would like to focus on the stress transgendered inviduals may face. For some it may be the pressures of society to look a certain way (females thin, males muscular). For others it may be an attempt to change their bodies to look more like the gender they identify as.

I will share my personal experience as an example. I have struggled with various eating disorders for many years. There are certainly other factors that contributed to the development, but being a male stuck in a female body left me feeling trapped and greatly increased the development of disordered eating. When puberty hit my body went haywire. Things were growing where they shouldn't and something started once a month. I hated my body even more. One way I could remove the traces of being female (hips, breasts, monthly) was to starve myself. It wasn't about being thin for me, but rather to become the straight, male figure I desired.

Now that I've begun to transition and I am recovering from the eating disorders I have begun to equate male = muscular. I believe this is due in part to society's expectations for men to be fit and buff and I feel I must be "built" to fit in and be perceived more as male.

I was wondering if anyone has struggled with eating disorders or simply disordered eating to change their bodies before they were able to transition and/or after to meet society's expectations? If you'd like to share your experiences that would be greatly appreciated, but if you would rather not that is completely fine. Everything will remain confidential (no screen names, pictures, etc. will be recorded). I also would like to do some personal interviews one on one. If anyone is interested in participating please with "interview" in the subject.

I appreciate any response and feedback on the topic. Even if you have not personally experienced an eating disorder, but have any opinions on the matter please feel free to share.

Thank you!

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi Logan

Welcome to Laura's hon.

I moved your post to the Introductions forum so that everyone has a chance to meet you.

I removed your email address in your post since privacy and security are paramount here at Laura's (see the Terms and Conditions).

After 5 posts, you may use the PM system here to engage in your conversations with people.

Security and confidentiality is our concern and responsibility.

I am sure that you understand.

Brenda

[Guest A.S.]

Welcome to Laura's.

I hope you find this enjoyable and you will meet a lot lovely people. take care

[Guest shane]

I have suffered with an eating disorder on and off for quite a few years now. I haven't been happy with my body since I was 10 years old. I am also an FTM. I think that my eating disorder is mostly because I am transgendered, although I know there are other factors also.

And welcome to Laura's.

[Guest casper]

Hi Logan,

<<curtsey>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We have FTM meetings -Mon & Fri 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna

[Guest ricka]

Hi Logan and welcome to Laura's!! My story is probably somewhat unique when it comes to body image, compulsive under-eating and compulsive exercising. I had long identified as a gay male and was obsessed with being thin and muscular as is very typical of gay male culture. I hated my body as I could never be thin enough or muscular. In fact I had gynecomastia since puberty and no amount of starving or exercise would hide the fact that I had female breasts and that I never did really have a muscular male build. When I finally began to accept myself as a transgendered MtF and as a hetero-woman rather than a gay male it changed my whole outlook about my body. I love being a voluptuous woman and having curves, big hips and a big butt and most of all having large female breasts. I am so much more connected to my body and discovered a self-confidence I never had before.

Hugs, Ricka