Think I'm Androgyne...

[Guest aliisa]

Since I can remember, my sexual fantasies have been me as a woman. (I'm male, 19, 20 in a month)

As a kid I would actually have dreams where I was a girl, just doing girl things. As I matured, it became more sexual.

I like dressing as a woman; it feels comfortable.

I see my body and I wonder that if I had breasts and long hair I could be beautiful, since I have a fast metabolism, I'm lean, and I'm pretty toned in my legs and stomach.

But, I like my penis. Sometimes I feel like I'd rather have a vagina, and at other times I feel like I like what I have. But the one thing I'm always sure of is that I'd rather look like a woman.

I don't quite know what to do... I'm in the Army ROTC and have a commitment to the army for around 8 years when I graduate. I took the COGIATI test and scored a 155, probable transsexual. I want to seriously consider hormones or something that could allow me to feel more like a woman and maybe even enlarge my breasts, but it's weird since I'm sure that's a big no-no for a future military officer...

Help...

[Guest praisedbeherhooves]

Until you are out of the army or until there is a massive reform of army laws you won't be able to transition. That's horrible but it is reality. What you said sounds a lot like being a transgenderist. However, you will need a licensed gender therapist to know for sure.

[Guest Kaitlyn88]

Since I can remember, my sexual fantasies have been me as a woman. (I'm male, 19, 20 in a month)

As a kid I would actually have dreams where I was a girl, just doing girl things. As I matured, it became more sexual.

I like dressing as a woman; it feels comfortable.

I see my body and I wonder that if I had breasts and long hair I could be beautiful, since I have a fast metabolism, I'm lean, and I'm pretty toned in my legs and stomach.

But, I like my penis. Sometimes I feel like I'd rather have a vagina, and at other times I feel like I like what I have. But the one thing I'm always sure of is that I'd rather look like a woman.

I don't quite know what to do... I'm in the Army ROTC and have a commitment to the army for around 8 years when I graduate. I took the COGIATI test and scored a 155, probable transsexual. I want to seriously consider hormones or something that could allow me to feel more like a woman and maybe even enlarge my breasts, but it's weird since I'm sure that's a big no-no for a future military officer...

Help...

I was in the Army myself. They'll discharge you when they find out. If you think you would be ok waiting the 8 years before handling the gender issues then you'll be ok. For most people that is way too long of a wait and the ones that do wait it out end up wishing they had done it sooner since results are better and it's more of your life being the right thing. I would see a civilian gender therapist, as long as you aren't active duty they don't have to tell the Army anything. Try to figure out which is more important for you. If you decide that you need to transition or anything instead you can get out of it by having your therapist give them documentation saying that you are transgendered. Either way that you decide you should really make sure because either way is a commitment.

[Guest Flistan]

I've been dealing with the same problems myself, just on the opposite end of the spectrum (feminine to more masculine transition). I had the dreams and feelings, and there was even a time where I was stupid enough to believe I was going to grow up being intersexed. >< I'm not really sure what to do myself, but if you accept what you believe is true, then acting yourself will be more free and fulfilling. It won't have to be about "will I look good in this sweater"- it'll be about "hey, would I like to wear that?" After you find yourself, being yourself should come as nature, not as a stress, although it might be quite an obstacle if you're in the military...

Good luck. :3