I Shoulda Known I Was A Transguy When...

[Guest SamIThinkIAm]

Feel free to add your own---and although I'm posting it in the FTM forums--ladies and my non-binary gender friends feel free to switch it to make it suit you

1. "THIS IS SPARTA!!!' me *totally pumped up RAWWR!!!* vs. female friends---*yawn--this is sooo for boys*

2. *In health class* wait---this is going to do what? I have to have a shirt on all the time? I have to wear what? and you're going to put that WHERE? OOOH HEEECCK NOO

3. That awkward feeling I get in the middle of the ladies undergarment section---'why the heck am I here?'

4. Feeling even more awkward putting on said undergarments

5. I hated, hated removing any kind of body hair

6. In elementary school the girls and guys were equally terrified of me---the girls because I thought they were stupid and threw snowballs at them and the guys because they couldn't stand getting their arses kicked by a 'girl'

7. 'OMG and then he said blah blah and she was sooo hurt, like what a creeper' *bashes head into wall WHY GOD WHY*

8. Being so insulted when my brothers got band t-shirts for Christmas when all I got was a stinkin' purse and a blouse that a girl would've killed for

9. Experiencing wicked amounts of penis envy and wanting to kill all my male friends/relatives when they went through puberty 'what do you mean I can't do that with a girl like you can--I want to'

10. Having a huge male ego and the complete and total utter anger and humiliation I felt when the boys got bigger and stronger than me and I couldn't keep up and win at arm wrestling etc.

11. 'let's watch 'the notebook' (walk to remember, ps. i love you...whatever movie like that)' *facepalm and groan* 'KILL ME NOW!!!'

12. Having a phantom 'limb' and instinctively protecting bits I don't have

13. Perfume? Make-up? ARRRGGH *runs for the hills*

14. Watching women behaving and interacting when I was young and being utterly confused--'why would you do that?? I just don't get it'

15. That ugly sinking feeling I got whenever someone used my birthname or female pronouns.

[Guest Pól]

This is so accurate. I'll add to it.

16. You want me to wear what? For any formal/formal-ish event. I was so thankful that I had the option of wearing trousers at school.

17. Complete confusion at why girls announce to the world they're off to the loo and why they go in packs.

18. No understanding of why a pocket bag is necessary. Because that's what pockets in your trousers are for, right?

20. Watching feens date girls you liked and thinking that if it were you, you might bollix it up anyway, but you would've been better at it than they were.

[Guest My_Genesis]

This is so accurate. I'll add to it.

16. You want me to wear what? For any formal/formal-ish event. I was so thankful that I had the option of wearing trousers at school.

17. Complete confusion at why girls announce to the world they're off to the loo and why they go in packs.

18. No understanding of why a pocket bag is necessary. Because that's what pockets in your trousers are for, right?

20. Watching feens date girls you liked and thinking that if it were you, you might bollix it up anyway, but you would've been better at it than they were.

dude I think we're living the same life.. weird...

anyways

21. Copying my dad taking his shirt off when we were at the beach when I was 4 years old.

22. Made what was essentially a paper STP (Fail!) when I was 4-5 years old.

23. Getting clothing for Christmas/B-days "oh..." vs. getting my first gameboy advance and game cartridge "Oh yeah best present ever!"

24. I was always in like 99th %ile in math and 60-70th in reading and always hated to read. I know, it's a stereotype. But in grade school hating to read was not something other girls could relate to. I thought something was wrong with me because all the girls were doing sooo much better than me with reading things I thought were insanely boring, but they would tell me how I'm so good at math. lol.

25. Feeling the need to compete academically. I saw school as one big competition. Just wanted to do better than everyone else. After all, we were geting scored on everything we did.

26. Being afraid of pregnancy at 8 years old.

27. Envying boys just for having a boy's body (since I was a little kid - but ongoing)

[Guest insanitylives]

3. That awkward feeling I get in the middle of the ladies undergarment section---'why the heck am I here?'

7. 'OMG and then he said blah blah and she was sooo hurt, like what a creeper' *bashes head into wall WHY GOD WHY*

10. Having a huge male ego and the complete and total utter anger and humiliation I felt when the boys got bigger and stronger than me and I couldn't keep up and win at arm wrestling etc.

12. Having a phantom 'limb' and instinctively protecting bits I don't have

Far too true.

I hate being 'little' its not like i'm that short, just lacking in any real strength. Stupid estrogen (if you're a guy... i mean.)

21. 'Girltalk' is a second, or possibly third, language (the other 2 being standard English and Guytalk)

22. No comprehension of WHY I would want to show people the large tumorous lumps on my chest.

23. You expect/want me to be that promiscuous(would like to use a different term here)? NOT HAPPENING.

24. Why do you torture yourself with things that jingle around your wrists? Really. A wristband is one thing, but it shouldn't sound like you have bells on.

25. Thinking certain organs appear at puberty

[Guest praisedbeherhooves]

Accurate, except for 5, 13, 18 and 6. Five because I actually don't like body hair on my guys, thirteen because I sort of like makeup though perfume normally is too overwhelming, eighteen because I find bags useful for carrying books and because an asocial, disabled "girl" who read all recess is not that frightening, even if "she" only talks about serial killers (I was a weird kid).

21. Attempting to pee standing up and then being shocked when it does not work.

22. Being horrified when puberty starts

[Flint]

Ah cool post. Heres some of my obvious signs.

1. "that shirt is tight mum. It shows my.....No i can't wear it, it's a femanine shape. It shapes my body too femanine! no way!"

2. Playing out with kids on my steet and lying to the younger ones cause i knew they were more likely to believe. "My mum and dad call me *birthname* cause when i was born they were confused about my gender and they didn't understand. And they really desperatley wanted a girl. But i'm not a girl"

3. Going behind a wall and pretending to pee standing up. When someone caught me out with a bottle pouring orange juice down the wall...I claimed that i had a medical condition, which would explain why my parents were confused about my gender. And in order for me to urinate the docs cave me this bottle with the special plastic thing on the end so that icould wee standing up like all the other boys........I was a creative child

4. Asking a teacher to call me 'Steven' In the register. Cause i thought a boy in our class called steven was cool and i wanted the same name too.

5. Telling people the reason i was such a skinng 'boy' was because i had a medical condition that meant i never seemed to put much weight on.

6. After getting tired of using the bottle trick i wanted to urinate standing up for real. I constantly tried...Over and over again. In the toilet and outside. Once my dad caught me and dragged me inside the house by ear and hair and i got a right bollocking for it! He seemed more upset at the fact i was standing up to urinate more than the fact i was peeing outside....However i continued to try this, even after the bollocking and shoutting from mother and father. I carried on doing it. I felt a compulsive NEED to do it. I didn't understand fully why apart from that because other boys did it that way. In a way it became an obsession. Possibly a unhealthy one at some points.

7. Having this odd feeling when i looked down at my arms and hands where i'd be like "These are my hands. Boys hands. My arms. BOYS arms BOYS BOYS BOYS!"

8. stuffing tissues down my trousers. Grabbing hold of the crotch of my pants like i saw boys doing sometimes. And even felt i needed to do, phantom limb.

9. For halloween once i got some plastic fingers. Skin coloured they were. It sounds odd...and i realise they look nothing like a penis but while in the bath i often held the finger to my crotch and i'd look at it and smile and say to myself "Look i have a willy!" Also i even started trying to make some modifications to it so that i could maybe pee through it! Didn't work out. But i tried!

10. When i slowly started to lose all my friends (due to health complications and me suddenly stopping going out cause of it and because alot of them moved away) i started living in a world of my own. I pretended to be presenters of shows. lol and i was always a male presenter.

11. Not wanting to correct people when they called me he, or a boy. At first i wasn't sure if this was more due to me feeling like i couldn't correct them cause it'd be humiliating....But i realised i'd always smile..Even if it didn't show on the outside at the time inside i felt like i smiled a bit and suddenly felt a bit better about myself.

I'm sure i have many more. But they're the main ones i can think of.

[Guest insanitylives]

Okay this is one of those times where I wish "edit" was a function.

Numbering lol

[Flint]

Far too true.

I hate being 'little' its not like i'm that short, just lacking in any real strength. Stupid estrogen (if you're a guy... i mean.)

21. 'Girltalk' is a second, or possibly third, language (the other 2 being standard English and Guytalk)

22. No comprehension of WHY I would want to show people the large tumorous lumps on my chest.

23. You expect/want me to be that promiscuous(would like to use a different term here)? NOT HAPPENING.

24. Why do you torture yourself with things that jingle around your wrists? Really. A wristband is one thing, but it shouldn't sound like you have bells on.

25. Thinking certain organs appear at puberty

I seemed to have it in my head that organs would appear at puberty. In fact even though i'd actually seen this to somewhat not be true....I actually managed to convince myself it was due to my medical conditions causing late development!

[Guest Xren]

--I refused to wear girl's underwear for quite a while, until my mom had to make me because I was going to summer camp.

--My reaction to getting my first period was yelling something along the lines of "Oh love!!!" loud enough that my mom could hear it from downstairs.

--I didn't want to shave my armpits for my Bat Mitzvah, and when I had to I felt like a part of me had been amputated.

--I tried to pee standing up because I thought I could.

--While looking at yaoi fanart, I gravitated towards the ultra-explicit type...and I wished I could be the seme/top.

--All the other girls in school had their wierd little rituals and secret codes and I was like, "wait, what the hell again?"

--My reaction to my stepbrother being allowed to have a zillion pocket knives was utter jealousy.

--My reaction to violence and gore in video games was "WOOHOO! love YEAH!"

--When I had an imaginary boyfriend, HE got pregnant.

[Guest Xren]

P.S. Oops...previous post I said bad words...my reaction to getting a first period was most distinctly NOT love, in case that was confusing.

[Guest Nicodeme]

24. Why do you torture yourself with things that jingle around your wrists? Really. A wristband is one thing, but it shouldn't sound like you have bells on.

*hides his rattly kandi bracelets*

>_>

Because they're pretty and colorful and look delicious?

Actually...only my wife nibbles on kandi. But it's so cute. :3

[Guest aadenr]

I use to think I was the only one who tried peeing standing up lol!

[Guest harvester52]

I too am guilty of the peeing standing up and failing thing. XD

There were a lot of things in my childhood that were tell-tales.

1. I refused to wear a shirt in the swimming pool. I insisted on trunks and no shirt.

2. When my siblings and I played house as kids, I was always the dad.

3. In middle school, I got so jealous of the boys in choir that could sing bass. I wanted that so bad.

4. I got in fights with my friends a lot because I don't understand girl talk.

The list goes on, but I'm tired and need a nap after the twelve hour gig I worked yesterday. >.<

Peace,

BC

[Guest insanitylives]

*hides his rattly kandi bracelets*

>_>

Because they're pretty and colorful and look delicious?

Actually...only my wife nibbles on kandi. But it's so cute. :3

I really though you were talking about food... if it was actually food that could be interesting.

I use to think I was the only one who tried peeing standing up lol!

nope. I tried, then got yelled at 'youre not a boy you can't do that'

[Guest SanePsychotic]

2. *In health class* wait---this is going to do what? I have to have a shirt on all the time? I have to wear what? and you're going to put that WHERE? OOOH HEEECCK NOO

3. That awkward feeling I get in the middle of the ladies undergarment section---'why the heck am I here?'

4. Feeling even more awkward putting on said undergarments

5. I hated, hated removing any kind of body hair

8. Being so insulted when my brothers got band t-shirts for Christmas when all I got was a stinkin' purse and a blouse that a girl would've killed for

13. Perfume? Make-up? ARRRGGH *runs for the hills*

15. That ugly sinking feeling I got whenever someone used my birthname or female pronouns.

I can really relate to all of these. Especially 15. My parents don't get it.

[Guest hayden_jude]

Oh man, nearly all of these things! I never tried to pee standing up or swim without a shirt - I was a modest child - but the rest are spot on. Especially the girl-talk ones. I had such a hard time being friends with girls....I never cared about their conversations. I always wanted to know what the boys were talking about.

[Guest Larson]

- I walked around the house without a shirt on well into fifth grade (I was a VERY late bloomer). My parents used to get peed.

- I always used to think of different ways I would style my facial hair when I grew up. One day in middle school, I had the awful epiphany that I wouldn't actually have facial hair in the future.

- Wearing dresses and other girl things really felt WRONG, like cruel and unusual punishment type of wrong.

- Definitely tried to pee standing up. A lot. I always figured if I got caught, I would claim to be practicing for camping.

- I was always on the boy's "team" at recess.

- When my mom took me to get my ears pierced, I was under the impression I would only be getting one pierced like boys do. I threw a huge tantrum when I found out I had to get both.

- When puberty finally started, my first thought was that I would get my breasts removed as soon as I turned 18. I knew this was possible because of family friends who had had breast cancer, but I had never heard anything about the transgender community at this point.

[Guest Alexander James]

-when playing house I was the Father

-I would ask my brother to trade places with me (I would be him and he would be me)

-I would pee standing (in the shower though....)

-I hated "girl talk" (still do a bit)

-loved Dragon ball instead of Sailor Moon (I liked them both though)

-Didn't like wearing dresses (Still don't but I sometimes wear them when bored)

-Hate long hair on me (though I want it for a Mohawk lol)

-I cried when I got my period

-I hate my period

-Freaked out when my breast started to form

-Wore baggy clothing to hide the fact I'm female [though there was a time I did try to be 100% female and wear super girl clothing and show off my body but I was uncomfortable (fail attempt at getting a BF and being normal)]

-I hate my female name

-I tried to make more male friends (I ended up friendless)

-Did everything that little boys like

-Shopping for undies are a huge embarrassment

-hated getting bras

There's probably more I can't think of though lol

[Guest My_Genesis]

- I walked around the house without a shirt on well into fifth grade (I was a VERY late bloomer). My parents used to get peed.

I did that too.

[Guest ScifiComicDUDE]

Mom: why cant you just be like yr sisters

lil bro: u are a boy who was a girl, did u have a sex change

swimming: allergic to H20....lie

breast: prayed for God for help......still waiting

daydreaming: of being a lad.........again still waitng

breast implants: have u lost your marbles

marriage & kids....did peter pan have kids? No?...well im just like him

Pregnancy- 9 months? how im i gonna skate?

makeup: wouldnt that ruin my cute face

periods: OMg im bleeding, im dying *faints*

bra&pants: man what great slingshots

[Guest hayden_jude]

-I was extremely self-conscious of my breasts when they started to form, and I freaked out when I got my period.

-I always got really uncomfortable when girls started talking about theirs.

-Just being in the women's underwear section of stores makes me hyperventilate - I get this tunnel vision thing and I need out of there.

-I always wanted to play soccer with the boys in elementary, even though I was horrible at it.

-I was happier with male friends - I didn't want to be seen with the girls really, afraid the boys would think I was one of them.

-I also hate my female name - it sounds like someone else, not me.

-Every time the girls wanted to play house, I would just casually slip away to go find something else to do.

-I remember being super disappointed one Christmas when one of my relatives who doesn't really know me gave me this enormous fingernail polish kit. I thought, why would you get me something so girly?

[Guest Wolfy19]

-Cringed when I developed breasts and started my period.

-Didn't know how to answer little kids who asked me if i was a girl or a boy wen i was about 4yrs old

-Getting angry when I had to play girly sports in high school (i.e. netball) instead of playing with the lads

-Feeling ridiculous when my girl mates wanted to put make up on me and i had felt sick when theyd ask to put makeup on.

-Knowing I had to go to prom in a dress but all I wanted was a tux

-Listening to my dad teach my brother in law how to put up shelves and mu mum being pleased he finally has another 'male' in the house to teach these things.

[Guest kaydinface]

1. I managed to hide my period from my parents for a year so they wouldn't think of me as "a young lady".

2. At a young age I never understood why those women who had their breasts removed due to cancer would get those special padded bras.

3. I refused to not wear a sports bra. Even while I slept.

4. Sure I'd wear a bathing suit/bikini, just with trunks and a tee shirt over.

5. The utter disgust I felt and still feel (at those times when I'm in girl mode) when boys look at me and I know they're looking at me as a female, at my chest and such.

6. I played with Barbie dolls as action figures. War, killing, decapitation, suffocating in mud pits, fake blood made from

markers, etc.

7. I was always jealous of those skinny girls that hadn't developed yet or had small chests.

8. The jealousy I felt when my dad would have father son time with my brother and teach him about cars, cleaning out the fire place, sports.

9. I was extremely suicidal during puberty.

10. And last but certainly not least, penis envy.

[Guest Dexter]

- When I cut all of my long hair off because I was sick of it

- Idolizing my cousin and wanting to be exactly like him

- My obsession with boys underwear and anguish at the realization that I had to wear these things called 'panties'

- Being crushed when my mom and sister asked me what I was going to do 'once I started to grow boobs'

- Always wanting to wear a blue tuxedo to some event

- Never wanting to go to church in a dress

- Trying to make my voice sound like a boys and asking my cousins, "Hey, does this sound like a boy to you?"

- Telling my day that, "Oh, I would wish to be a boy," when he asked me what I would wish for if I had to make a wish for a student of the week thing in first grade

And there are plenty of more.

I just can't think of them right now.

[Guest My_Genesis]

I played with Barbie dolls as action figures. War, killing, decapitation, suffocating in mud pits, fake blood made from

markers, etc.

lol one of the only times I ever remember playing w/Barbies was with one of my cousins, we were throwing them down the stairs.