Do I Try?

[Guest Justme]

Hi All. Been dealing with alot of stuff since my sister's passing. Family againsnt famiily. Trying to put me in the middle. I have told them all that I will not take sides,,,,so now i am the odd man out. On top of that....I had been in a relationship with a transwoman. And that ended. She kept looking to me...to make all the decisions for our lives...and I kept telling her,,,No. If we are going to be together....it has to be both of us making the decisions. And I am now thinking....what did I do wrong? Why am I the one that is still alone? I must really suck and just not know it. Look out!!! I might be contagious!!!

[Guest ~Brenda~]

No. If we are going to be together....it has to be both of us making the decisions.

Justme,

I applaud you for sticking up for your principles and values. Indeed a healthy relationship is a sharing and equal partnership. You were absolutely right.

I am sorry that your girlfriend did not see it that way, but that is her problem, not yours.

In reality, she had a romantic fantasy of what your relationship should be. You had a realistic expectation of what the relationship should be.

Stick to your guns. Finding a mate that has the same values as you is very important.

Do not sell yourself short.

I am sorry to hear about your family dynamics. I do hope that things calm down etween you and your family soon.

Love

Brenda

[Guest JKarician]

I wouldn’t say you’re contagious Justme, or even that you “suck”, just that you are at a very difficult spot in your life right now and it seems like you are particularly overwhelmed. I’m terribly sorry to hear of your sister’s passing, I hope that in time your family will be able to come together and remember all the wonderful memories and time you had with her. Emotions sound like they are running very high right now with you being put in the middle and then with your relationship falling apart no wonder you feel poorly. I can understand how hard it must be for you right now, but try to look at the positive things you do have in your life. From what you are saying about your relationship, you had the courage to stand up for not only yourself but for her rights to make decisions too. That is very admirable. There are many of us out there still looking for the right person to come along, just keep doing your best.

-J

[Guest Justme]

Thanks Brenda for your reply. You are a sweetheart!