Need Your Prayers

[Guest Michele H]

Saturday, Karen and Stacey were going to come up and spend the weekend. I had tickets to the opera for the three of us - those plans got derailed. Saturday morning I got a text message from Jen that her Dad had just taken Karen to the emergency room. ( For those who have already lost track, Jen lives with me, Karen is her mother and Stacey is Jen's sister. - Jen and her BF were down in Iowa for a wedding) 2 hours later, I got a text that Karen was admitted to the hospital. Karen suffers from depression and anxiety and I seem to be the only one who can keep her calm in stressful situations. She was hemoraging and some how the message from the ER to the hospital didn't convey that she was in major distress so they wern't monitoring her vitals, just checking how much blood she was passing and hemagloblen levels. They should have started a saline drip first thing but did not. I was about to go into steel magnolia mode when a doc showed up, listened to her heart, stepped out into the hallway and suddently the room was full of people hooking things up to her. Once they had her more or less stable, they moved her to a private room on the OBGYN floor. Saturday night she had 4 bags of blood and 2 of saline so they could go in the next morning and do a D&C. She is a nurse and knows all the things that can go wrong, had never had a transfusion or an operation before and her anxiety levels were high. I got some sleep Saturday night on a fold out bed in her room but am a light sleeper and they were checking her every hour on the hour. Sunday evening, I drove home and got a nights sleep but no shower, Monday morning as I was trying to get myself functioning, I got a text that Jen's GrandPa was dying. I stuffed some clothes back in the bag along with some things for Jen and picked her up at the VA for a 3 hour drive to Marshall where the family gathered by his bed side. He wasn't expected to last more than a few hours but as the sun rose this morning, is breathing is better and his O2 levels markedly improved but it was another sleepless night for me. Jen and her BF are getting some sleep in a motel room, Pepper (dog) was getting restless so I took Pepper out for exercise and am now sitting in a McDonalds trying to stay awake while I write this. Lee (her dad) drove Karen back to the hospital at 3 this morning (they live in Mankato, about a 2 hour drive from Marshall. They are doing an ultrasound and I expect that later this week will be back in Mankato when Karen has a historectomy. The fuel tank to running low, I need a shower, have not been able to keep up with HRT with everything going on - we could all use your prayers at the moment. At least I am able to work remotely. Have a conference call in 10 minutes then will go wake up the kids.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Oh Michele!

Oh baby - I know you are in a terrible place - but...

but... I don't have the words! I will pray for you and yours!

Please keep us informed!

Lizzy

[When I say I will pray - I really do it! I am a beliver in the power of prayer - oh my - I feel so sad for you]

[Guest Donna Jean]

Michele....

Oh my goodness, Michele...you certainly do have some major things going on in your life right now..

Please eat and get your sleep so that you don't get sick, too.....OK?

I'm so sorry to hear of all that is going on right now in your life and the lives of those around you...

I'm sending you my love and energy....

BIGGGGG HUGGGGGS!

Donna Jean

[Guest Bailey]

Michele,

You have my prayers. I really hope things get better. I am sure everything will come out alright.

With Love,

Aislinn

[Carolyn Marie]

Gee, Michelle, that is too much for one person to have to deal with.

Just take things one day at a time, and hopefully they will all work out for the best.

I know you want to be there for everyone, and so far you have been, but if you don't take good

care of yourself too, you won't be worth a dang. So ease up, get some rest, and recharge those

batteries.

I will pray for you and all those in your family who are hurting right now. May God be with you all.

(((HUGGSS)))

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Michele H]

Some good news! The biopsy of the tissue removed during Karen's D&C showed no cancer and they examined all of the tissue. Karen is on bed rest until Friday when she goes in for a historectomy. I'm torn, I have electroysis scheduled for Saturday morning (face and bottom) but feel like I should be there for Karen but also need to do the bottom electrolysis if I'm to be ready for my surgery in June. Hopefully, I can get some sleep before Friday and figure out the right thing to do. Grandpa's temp is going back up and his 02 is bad again. Jen is hanging in there but she will have a melt down soon. Have to have her back to the cities by Wed afternoon for an appointment with her counselor (she will need it!) Well that's that current status and thank you everyone for your kind words and thoughts

[Guest Jean Davis]

Ohh My Michele

I'm so sorry to hear, this is a lot to happen to anyone all at once.

I can see that there is a lot of your family looking to you for support and guidance. Please make sure you are taking care of yourself for them and be strong.

But remember even the mighty oak can only bear so much weight before it breaks.

Please after the situation has calmed down a bit and your family is feeling better go and get some help for yourself. Perhaps talk with your therapist and release all those emotions you are so courageously holding back.

May my love, prayers and strength go with you honey.

LUV

Jean

[Guest Amanda joan]

Michele,

You have got you hands full. I will pray for you.

I do believe that we transwomen have special powers to handle tough situations. This comes from the constant struggle on this journey we have choosen for ourselves.

I would like to share a shift in my thinking that has brought me a great deal of relief.

I have been routinely upset that everytime I have a great expierence I come crashing down face first in the mud the next day. The truth as I see it is that we are all on a difficult and turbulent journey. We are going to have our ups and downs.

The shift; I now look at life through a new lens. I am walking on this difficult and turbulent muddy path. Every so often if I am brave enough to jump up into the light and have something good in my life, I get to enjoy this bump up out of the mud and into the wonderful light of love and friendship. Then I am returned to the path and if I am not ready for my landing I fall face first in the mud and then have to pick myself up and continue on.

I hope to come up with a more pleasant metaphor some day. It's a shift to a reality that it is my actions that create the ups and it is life's journey that supplies the downs. We are all in our own personal battles. It is always good to have a new weapon for the fight.

Peace & Love Amanda

[Guest Michele H]

today's update. Grandpa Rusty passed on Wed. Jen, her dad and I were with him when he gave up the ghost. The funeral arrangements are made and the funeral is Saturday. Karen had her surgery today and I am staying with her today and Saturday while the rest of the family goes to the funeral. Jen and I did get to sleep in our own beds last night, take showers and get fresh clothes. A shower never felt so good! We also got back in town for my regular Thursday counseling session. Jen and I have the same counselor and since she missed her session, she took mine. I am doing fine, tired but fine. My biggest worry is my weight! I have to be down to 179 by 11 May and actually gained two pounds this week - I weighed 187 this morning!

[gennee]

You have my deepest sympathies, Michelle.

Gennee

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Michele - sorry to hear about your loss - dang - when it rains...

Sooo

Weight gain? Oh honey all that hospital food and junk... I hope it get's better... oh my

MORE prayers! YES MA'AM - GOTTEM!

Hang in there my sweet!

Elizabeth