Am I Ready

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

My sister has invited me to go out tomorrow night... to a bar. A lot of old friends will be there, and I haven't been spending much time in the world lately. I've been talking care of everyone else and dealing with doctor's. I would like to go out and have some fun for a change. I told her I no longer drink, but she goes to this place with the same people every week. I would like to go but I'm not sure if I am ready. There are other drinks there other than alcohol obviously....

[MaryEllen]

My advice would be, don't go. There would be too much temptation.

MaryEllen

[Guest Jean Davis]

I would have to agree with Mary Ellen on this one Alex.

Perhaps a good meal and a movie.

Or being that the weather is getting better there may be a couple of different events you could attend.

Perhaps you could look in the news paper for them.

LUV

Jean

[Sally]

Alex,

Sweetheart, I would ask her if you could go somewhere that didn't serve drinks at all as a way to work yourself back into the real world.

It just might be too much for you.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

Maybe I will just stay home

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

I don't belong out in the world anyway

[Carolyn Marie]

I don't belong out in the world anyway

Wrong, wrong, wrong!

You do belong out in the world, because the world is a better place with you in it. You deserve to be in the sunlight and the fresh air and feel

everything that you can't feel in a hospital room or watching T.V., or staring at this dang computer screen.

But there is so much more to the world than the inside of a bar, Alex. Nothing personal, but I wish your sister had more sense than to invite you

to that type of place, among all the other places you could go.

Take Jean's advice and go see a movie. Just don't put temptation in a glass on a bar counter and ask yourself to resist it.

Shoot, if we lived in the same town, I'd take you out myself.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

Well I haven't really been eating much, so a meal would be a waste of money....

I can't keep my attention on a movie anymore, not without also reading, and doing at least 2 other things, then i sort of watch a movie, otherwise i fall asleep or walk away.

[Guest viv]

Hey Alex,,you know Hun, my early attempts at sobriety kept goin down the tubes cos

of my trips to the bar /pub/lounge to meet friends and buzz etc. The booze is just too

close to hand Alex < that and you see folk having a good time and before you know it

you brain is your enemy !!!!! its telling you "" look at all those folk having such a buzz,

maybe a beer or two wont do any harm "" temptation making your own brain your

worst enemy , I know Hun as I lived that hell a few times prior to this time round ,13

years sober . Its obvious from your posts you want the peace and tranquility of being

sober ,,,,you will get there Hun. Just to finish,,,,it really is worth it , its worth the fight.

luv,viv

[Guest Elizabeth K]

I don't belong out in the world anyway

AGAINST the grain here.

Alex - how strong do you feel? Can you absolutely - positively - one hundred percent avoid temptation?

The question is ARE YOU READY???

Only you can answer... if you do go and you do avoid tempation, that is an affirmation of yourself as a sober alchoholic - which will do you a huge amount of good.

BUT... if you go and fail? It will be crushing to you.

Lot of pressure here. Will your sister support you? And WHY a bar???

Dang

Lizzy

[Guest Donna Jean]

Alex......

Well, do something, Hon!

Heck, go to a cockroach race...people only go to those to watch them crash and burn, anyways....

But, sitting around and brooding is bad, too..

You need a distraction...you need to occupy yourself...

Your sister should know better.......

That's not support at all...

LOVE

Donna Jean

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

There is nowhere to go... I won't enjoy it anyways. Maybe I will just go to the bar... if I end up drinking I just will never become sober again.

[Guest Donna Jean]

I really love your wolf painting........

Donna Jean

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

Thanks... I guess... I personally think it's horrible

[Guest Elizabeth K]

I don't belong out in the world anyway

OOOPS - forgot to comment on that dumb thing you wrote - grin!

YOU BELONG

Honey - you definately belong! You are 'belongier' that 99% of the people in the world! I mean, look how hard it is for us trans - we WORK at belonging, most people just coast along, think they got it made, don't have a clue how hard it can be. YOU BELONG - you've earned it!!!!

Lizzy

[megandb]

Alex, I would suggest you dont go as the temptation is too high, however you do need to get out sometimes (comming from me thats something lol) go to the libary or to a movie or something or ask your sister to take you to a venue that does not have any adult beverages but where you can still enjoy yourself

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

I won't go... I'm not going to go anywhere...

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

I should have just went to the bar

[Guest Elizabeth K]

I should have just went to the bar

If you were ready. Don't think that Lauras's is any different than the rest of the world. We give an opinion - that is all that it is - an opinion. You are the only one who knows your heart. You may have been fine - you may have relapsed.

Alcoholics eventually integrate into the world - which includes places that use alcohol as a social tool for breaking down inhibitions. YOU cannot tolerate alcohol, it is toxic to you. Unfortunately that keeps you in a position the rest of your life where you have to be careful.

Alex - I am diabetic II. I cannot have sugar! Everyone else can - but I cannot. It is toxic to me. I go to a birthday party and I cannot have even one piece of cake. I cannot drink Cocacola with my hamburger, nor eat french fries (potatos convert to sugar as they are digested - so do almost all starchy foods).

Yes - one bite - soooo good - 15 minutes later a 'sugar poisoning' reaction - blurry vision, congestion, a pain in my jaw like a toothache. If I ignore all that and eat like a normal person I eventually lose my eyesight, my limbs, my life.

We all have something - alcoholic at your age is unfortunate - but sooooo what! What doesn't kill you makes you stronger (Dang stupid saying, but seems to be true!)

You are okay - disappointed - missed social opportunity - but your sister wasn't doing you a favor, maybe.

Hope this helps - you know I love you!

Lizzy

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

I was more thinking I should have went to the bar purposely to relapse. I should have went and drank the night away. Gotten as drunk as possible and then work on staying that way.

[Guest]

Hi Alex,

Some part of you wanted to go there, but the better part of you stayed away. That's a good thing!

You undoubtedly know much more about this than I do - you know that alcohol won't ease pain - you know it won't make you happier - you know you would be really angry with yourself for relapsing. So do take heart that none of this happened. Ease up on yourself a bit, and you'll see that you did the right thing. I'm really happy for you.

Take care, each day, please?

Love, Kat

[Guest viv]

I was more thinking I should have went to the bar purposely to relapse. I should have went and drank the night away. Gotten as drunk as possible and then work on staying that way.

Hey Alex,,,hope you are good Hun ,,sober ?? with all my heart I hope you are .

Ever come across the term Corsekoffs Psychosis ???. I"m probably spelling the

gentlemans name wrong and re that appologise . "" Corsekoff, an Eastern

European , discovered the connection between insanity and alcohol abuse ,,we

lay folk in recovery refer to same as "" wet brain "" . Once your alcoholism

reaches that stage theres no coming back < you are insane for the rest of your

life < the rest of your life !!!!!will you please think re that Hun ??? . I was about

3 or so years in recovery when I decided to join a group of fellow alcoholics who

would , if called, go to the aid of alcoholics in trouble ,,say a slip ,,or the insane

guilt of a sufferer who was trying to come back after a slip. Its then and on several

occasions I came across " wet brain " in alcoholics . Trying to help those afflicted

still haunts me today and I carry ** baggage ** because of my time trying to

help <<there are times I am completely hopelessly awkward/ inept /with some

people ,,,,,I got damaged by the booze too ,,forever . Well Alex,,,dont know if you

will read this ,,,medicine can be a bitter pill Hun. If you do I hope some if not all

of my reply makes you see this ,,,,hell is waiting for you if you continue . Will

you make my day Alex <<make my life worth something ,,,,walk away from

that crap ,,,,,,and start to smile . I did that , you can . luv,viv

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

Hey Alex,,,hope you are good Hun ,,sober ?? with all my heart I hope you are .

Ever come across the term Corsekoffs Psychosis ???. I"m probably spelling the

gentlemans name wrong and re that appologise . "" Corsekoff, an Eastern

European , discovered the connection between insanity and alcohol abuse ,,we

lay folk in recovery refer to same as "" wet brain "" . Once your alcoholism

reaches that stage theres no coming back < you are insane for the rest of your

life < the rest of your life !!!!!will you please think re that Hun ??? . I was about

3 or so years in recovery when I decided to join a group of fellow alcoholics who

would , if called, go to the aid of alcoholics in trouble ,,say a slip ,,or the insane

guilt of a sufferer who was trying to come back after a slip. Its then and on several

occasions I came across " wet brain " in alcoholics . Trying to help those afflicted

still haunts me today and I carry ** baggage ** because of my time trying to

help <<there are times I am completely hopelessly awkward/ inept /with some

people ,,,,,I got damaged by the booze too ,,forever . Well Alex,,,dont know if you

will read this ,,,medicine can be a bitter pill Hun. If you do I hope some if not all

of my reply makes you see this ,,,,hell is waiting for you if you continue . Will

you make my day Alex <<make my life worth something ,,,,walk away from

that crap ,,,,,,and start to smile . I did that , you can . luv,viv

yeah i'm sober, still...

[Guest viv]

Well done Alex , meetings <<think re a few meetings . If

you get to one pour your heart out , let those there hold

you Hun,suck in their strength ,they want you to do that .

I swear ,,,you will never again in your life experience the

power of that kind of love,,I am still in awe today of that

memory/emotion, those people had my soul in their hands .

Go to meetings ,go to see your future , its yours . luv,viv