Battling To Quit Drinking And Smoking

[Guest A.S.]

I am doing good with living by myself and start hanging out with friends and family who knows me as Cross-dresser.

There's two problems that I am dealing with, drinking alcohol and smoking cigs. I find myself getting harder to quit. I know I have to do something and I can't afford going back to depression and causing trouble on my family and friends and regret what I said or done the next morning. I know it don't hurt to drink every once in a while but... I have alcoholic runs in my family and I am one of the alcoholic. I know I need a willpower to fight it... I can't do it without support.

I am happy jolly man who want to enjoy drinking but I may get carry away when I get drunk and I don't want that again...

I don't want to admit that I need support... but... I have to say I need support...

I can't do this alone anymore longer.

[Guest Evan_J]

Thank goodness you realize when you need support.

I know this is gonna sound like advice for "someone else" (cuz the people we imagine here are not "people like us" in our mind) but the best kind of support I found is the support at AA and NA meetings. Its not because "they know what to say" its because they've walked in those shoes. A part of what makes it work is getting to see yourself via the other members. You also would be able to get a sponsor; someone you could talk to one-on-one when you needed to , that you could call when you felt like you needed to, and that actually would know what you were going through because they were there too.

And in fact I'm givin you that advice because I used it once.

You made the statement "I know it don't hurt to drink once in a while". Thats only true for people who are not alcoholics. Someone who is not worried about regrets and what they've said or done and hurting their family "the next morning".

Its a hard thing to do to walk into any room of people and "admit" something that doesn't make you happy about yourself aloud. But the support and tools on the other side of being able to do it are of higher value.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Sigh

As usual - I have to agree with Evan! There are the local AA people - and sometimes other groups - that specialize in this - this works because these groups are really programmed to be run by people who have "been there, done that."

It's like Laura's in a way as EVERYONE here understands gender dysphoria, everyone there understands addiction! So that is probably the route to take.

BUT also?

Look in the alcohol and drug abuse forums - people who are both gender dysphoric and also have the birth defect of alcohol intollerance? GOOD stuff in there!

Quitting smoking! Well I did it when my mother developed lung disease. I saw myself in 20 years! She suffered so! I dedicated stopping smoking to her - and was a cigar and pipe smoker? Not addicted? Hell with that - YES I was addicted! One of the hardest things I ever had to do - smoking free since 1988.

So keep us updated- we are here for you!!!

Lizzy

[Guest A.S.]

Thanks Evan,

I got people telling me last week that it wouldn't hurt to drink once in a while... but for me... like addiction, because I have been drinking since I was 25 yrs old and don't know when to quit. I am working on limiting myself from drinking too much. last week, I remembered everything but geez I watched the video that my friend took... they thought i was funny but to me, it looked like I was like a bad person waiting for someone to start running their mouths. Kinda made me realized I need help in some way that I am too stubborn to ask for support and help... I am starting to think that I have bipolar when I drink alcohol.

My real dad had bipolar when he drinks too and even after he did quit drinking since in the 90's, he is still bipolar.

[Guest A.S.]

Sigh

As usual - I have to agree with Evan! There are the local AA people - and sometimes other groups - that specialize in this - this works because these groups are really programmed to be run by people who have "been there, done that."

It's like Laura's in a way as EVERYONE here understands gender dysphoria, everyone there understands addiction! So that is probably the route to take.

BUT also?

Look in the alcohol and drug abuse forums - people who are both gender dysphoric and also have the birth defect of alcohol intollerance? GOOD stuff in there!

Quitting smoking! Well I did it when my mother developed lung disease. I saw myself in 20 years! She suffered so! I dedicated stopping smoking to her - and was a cigar and pipe smoker? Not addicted? Hell with that - YES I was addicted! One of the hardest things I ever had to do - smoking free since 1988.

So keep us updated- we are here for you!!!

Lizzy

I do believe smoking is addicted like drugs. and something thing with alcohol... more like make me addicted. My step-dad's telling me I need to stop what I am doing now...

again, after I saw the video of myself... I wasn't myself... I was laughing and everything and all the suddenly saw something that I didn't like... which that wasn't me... more like I was waiting for someone to start running their mouth about my past and looking for a fight. I don't want that. Which Video don't tell lies about ppl and drinking.

[JenniferB]

Sorry to hear you are having troubles but glad you are seeking help.

I've quit smoking and drink rarely now. The advice of going to AA is really good. Since you have alcoholics in the family I would advise against quitting drinking cold turkey. You should seek the help of a doctor. If you try to stop drinking cold turkey, it can be deadly.

You can quit smoking cold turkey but it's going to be tough. For the first week to two weeks you will be thinking constantly about having a cigarette. After that there will be times you will suddenly notice that you weren't thinking about a cigarette, but the urge comes back in waves. The waves will gradually diminish over time. After one month you will find you don't think about smoking that much. But other events can trigger a craving, like being around someone else who is smoking. Still I would recommend finding help. Here is a government site you might find some info. smokefree.gov

Good Luck my friend

Susan

[Guest A.S.]

Sorry to hear you are having troubles but glad you are seeking help.

I've quit smoking and drink rarely now. The advice of going to AA is really good. Since you have alcoholics in the family I would advise against quitting drinking cold turkey. You should seek the help of a doctor. If you try to stop drinking cold turkey, it can be deadly.

You can quit smoking cold turkey but it's going to be tough. For the first week to two weeks you will be thinking constantly about having a cigarette. After that there will be times you will suddenly notice that you weren't thinking about a cigarette, but the urge comes back in waves. The waves will gradually diminish over time. After one month you will find you don't think about smoking that much. But other events can trigger a craving, like being around someone else who is smoking. Still I would recommend finding help. Here is a government site you might find some info. smokefree.gov

Good Luck my friend

Susan

Thanks for the smoke free link... Going to check it out...

About the alcoholic in the family, what's the best way to quit cold turkey? drink little by little until there's no craving for it at all?

[JenniferB]

Thanks for the smoke free link... Going to check it out...

About the alcoholic in the family, what's the best way to quit cold turkey? drink little by little until there's no craving for it at all?

I don't know how much you drink so I can't really answer your question. If you quit cold turkey you can get hallucinations amoung other things. I would start researching online about alcoholism, the symptoms, and the symptoms if you decide to quit on your own. Trying to cut back rarely works because the desire to have another drink after the first one becomes magnified. I wouldn't try quitting on my own if I've been drinking for years and drink heavily. Sorry I couldn't give you advice on how to quit on your own. It's just too risky.

Susan

[Guest Evan_J]

Thanks Evan,

I got people telling me last week that it wouldn't hurt to drink once in a while... but for me... like addiction, because I have been drinking since I was 25 yrs old and don't know when to quit. I am working on limiting myself from drinking too much. last week, I remembered everything but geez I watched the video that my friend took... they thought i was funny but to me, it looked like I was like a bad person waiting for someone to start running their mouths. Kinda made me realized I need help in some way that I am too stubborn to ask for support and help... I am starting to think that I have bipolar when I drink alcohol.

My real dad had bipolar when he drinks too and even after he did quit drinking since in the 90's, he is still bipolar.

Alcoholics are not always bipolar and vice versa. Bipolar is a medical condition and can be influenced by genetics. Could be that you are if he was , I would see a doctor to verify if thats the case. If it is though, the alcohol certainly can make the episodes more extreme. That likely is what you saw in your fathers case. The good news is that it can handled with medication. I have to agree with your stepfather, if theres a problem the sooner its stopped the better. Be glad that someone who cares is aware. Thats not always the case. Easier to go ahead and deal with when its not hidden.

[Guest Aurora Christy]

Those are two tough things to give up hun. But once you do, you will feel so much better.

There are many different ways to quit (I still rarely drink but not enough to get drunk) and I tried many methods over and over again and the only one that worked was cold turkey and replacing my addiction with something else. Like, I run when I feel like I need to smoke.

Stop while you can still let your body heal and bounce back.

[Guest A.S.]

Alcoholics are not always bipolar and vice versa. Bipolar is a medical condition and can be influenced by genetics. Could be that you are if he was , I would see a doctor to verify if thats the case. If it is though, the alcohol certainly can make the episodes more extreme. That likely is what you saw in your fathers case. The good news is that it can handled with medication. I have to agree with your stepfather, if theres a problem the sooner its stopped the better. Be glad that someone who cares is aware. Thats not always the case. Easier to go ahead and deal with when its not hidden.

I am going try to see if I can find some AA meeting online and see what i can find for my area... I am thinking about having a talk with my mom and my step-dad about having me go to the dr for bipolar wise. and try to attend to aa and non smoking meeting... I am going try to keep ya'll informed how I am doing... I am reading smokefree.gov website... it is giving me a wake up call

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

Thanks for the smoke free link... Going to check it out...

About the alcoholic in the family, what's the best way to quit cold turkey? drink little by little until there's no craving for it at all?

I've tried both ways... but drinking little by little didn't work for me because then the craving never went away. I ended up quitting cold turkey, it is rough, but it's possible. I wasn't much for AA... I don't like groups. I asked my regular therapist for help and she has been a BIG help. She found me a lot of information and resources.

[Guest A.S.]

Thanks for the posts. ... I have some update news.... I will be posting 'em in a few mins.