Peer Pressure!

[Guest 91curiouskitten]

Well at work today my fruiend/work parnet roy has kept pressuring me to sip from his hardees cup which held blakc velvet and another liquor I dont know, along with a Joose, an alchoholic drunk, and I accpeted. I have been about a constant drunk today, and it scares me, I don wanna be an aclholic, but I cant seem to stay away from peer pressure, I am out to him, he knows I am TRans, his sister is a lesbian and I personally think a FtM from what I've heard/seen from her but not gunna judge, she si what she is and if sh ecome sout to somethign else then grreat. Anyways,m how do I stop this peer pressure and how do I jsut say no? Why is it so ahrd to say a one sylable word?

18 btw

[Guest Opal]

Hi Kitten,

I am sorry that you are suffering so. I cannot imagine just how much pressure Roy has put on you. Any chance that you could have a different work partner?

Most all jobs require its employees to be sober. Roy could be putting both of you at serious risk of being fired.

Alcohol will at best delay and complicate your transitioning. At worst, it could prevent you from transitioning at all.

Please do not give into Roy or the alcohol any longer. It is only a temporary reprieve, and the costs are extremely high.

Saying No may be one of the worst struggles you will have next to being TG, but it will be worth saying no in the long run.

Please keep us posted as you can. People here do care about you.

Huggs,

Opal

[Guest Pól]

Kaylin, anyone asking you to drink when you don't want to does not have your best interests at heart. There's a way to drink safely, and that's not it. Just tell him you don't want to drink if you don't (easier said than done, I know). If you don't want to do that, fill your own mug with something non-alcoholic, and when he offers you his, just say you like yours better, or something like that.

[Guest Nikki A]

well, i've been put under similar pressure before, and saying no usually didn't lead to more pressure. but it sounds like he's pushing even after an initial no. so maybe you should respond with a more firm response to make it clear to him you are not interested

hugs, Nikki

(i don't mean to pat myself on the back, but i think the above advice applies to a lot of situations! i just noticed )

[Guest nelo]

I usually say I'm allergic to it. Won't work for those that you've already drank alcohol around, but will for others.

Besides that, you are underage. It's illegal. You don't want to go to jail, right? You friend shouldn't want to get you in trouble either... with the law or with your own tendencies.

[Guest 91curiouskitten]

I really like p'ols idea, I'm gunna use that ((not a mug though, we work otuside at a firestation, general maintanence and such, but a thermos works!))

but good advice from everyone!

-pats nikk's back-! There I did it for you

[Sally]

Kaylin,

It is never easy and sometimes they do not want to hear no, but if you stick with it eventually they will stop pressuring you.

I made it through college in two fraternities and have played in numerous jazz bands and have never taken a drink - I didn't want to so I did not.

I was never rude until they were.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Pól]

I really like p'ols idea, I'm gunna use that ((not a mug though, we work otuside at a firestation, general maintanence and such, but a thermos works!))

but good advice from everyone!

-pats nikk's back-! There I did it for you

Glad you like the idea -- if you feel like it's not working though, let me know and I'll try to think of something else for you.

[JJ]

Kaylin

One of the things you can count on with alcoholics is that they want drinking buddies and don't use any judgment about time and place or any other circumstances. If you friend is drinking like that at they may well be an alcoholic. You aren't being unfriendly when you say no-just smart.

and it isn't the friend that's offering-it's the drunk. I don't know if that's the case here but it sounds likely. It's easier to turn someone down if you know it's not really the friend who's offering.

I had one other concern. How are you getting home? The statistics and the risks on drinking and driving are horrific. Just not worth it.

Anyway I am so glad you found a strategy that will work for you! And impressed that you are seeking a solution because you see the dangers!

With Love

JJ

[Guest 91curiouskitten]

I dont get into a viechel if the perosn had a sip of a beer, its anoyed a few people but its how I am x.x my mother picks us up, ad I guess, im jus gunna try n weasle out cuz I feel abd saying no outright