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By AllieJ · Posted
No, though I am generally happy with my life. Transitioning later in life has left me in a position where I don't pass, and it sometimes confuses people, which makes me sad. I am able to live quite normally due to a supportive community, but I neither chose nor wanted to be trans, so I do hold a level of conflict with it. Early in my transition, my psychologist told me I needed to come to terms with my new role (but she had no advice how to do this) or I wouldn't find peace, and I doubt I ever will. I have learned to live with this, and I am trying to make the most of my time, but true peace and happiness has eluded me. Hugs, Allie -
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By Amy Powell · Posted
My wife and I love to cook together, so we have started to create a recipe book to collect all the great flavors we've cooked over the years. These are amongst my favorites. -
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By Willow · Posted
lol Now logarithmic is a word I haven’t heard since I was in High School in the mid 60s. @Mirrabooka. We used to use logarithms to be able to do higher level math. Of course this was before calculators, we also used slide rules. The first personal calculators that were capable of more than more than simple math cost hundreds of dollars. And only came out in the mid 70s. Today you carry a very capable computer in your pocket or even on your wrist. -
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By Vidanjali · Posted
Welcome to this community, @BLACKSPARKLES. Despite the loss you've experienced, it sounds like you've also made a lot of progress. Do you desire community in real life? If so, there are measures you can take and investigation you can do. Breaking out of a solitary existence can be very intimidating and nerve-wracking, but extremely rewarding beyond imagination. You did not share details of your health challenges, but presuming you have much life yet to live, just consider that it's never ever too late to start living in a different way. That is, if it's your desire. Please forgive me for any presumption. Much love. -
By Amy Powell · Posted
On a side note. Since i've had some issues with the undies I decided to keep a bra on to be atleast expressive until I can resolve the problem. I've learned I love wearing a bra and will def incorporate this into my attire (I present as male). Thanks all again for the wonderful suggestions!!! -
By Amy Powell · Posted
Thank you all for the suggestions. These are all avenues I can explore. I appreciate greatly!!! -
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By Timi · Posted
No. I am not at peace. I am going through an awful emotional season at this part of my transition. I am so grateful to have a therapist to talk to. I am SO very grateful for you all and this space. Especially at this time. Thank you. -Timi -
By Stacie.H · Posted
Hey Hey!!!!! Everyone!!! What an exhilarating year thus far...!! Its Goin Good for me just anticipation as I open up more through this Transitioning process is Scary, Fun, Exciting, Unknown, Accomplished, and well Wanted more than I ever could have thought at this point into HRT.... I hope this year for you is your best to! Its bare minimum exciting every day and my drive as Stacie has picked up pace interestingly!!!! I came out first to my two sisters right before the new year started. It was actually right after Christmas 2023. I didn't plan when and how to come out to someone I was close to, I opened up and told them, and it just happened... My emotions got the best of me and well, I spilled the beans as they say. I told another sister of mine shortly thereafter but she was already asking questions. And the 3 Sisters that know what I am doing support me 100% There are things I heard other Trans people describe in their process of HRT that I didn't get at the time but now I know where they were coming from, and HRT is literally more life changing than I ever realized........And It's AWESOME!! But I do think as Transition takes place it does affect others around you not only family but especially in the workplace and that is challenging in itself to address and how to take care of that kind of observational awareness so to speak. Although at this point now my job I do believe knows or suspects something is up like they may be thinking I'm transgender, I have my evaluation with them coming up and I'm somewhat worried that they're going to ask me, which is fine but will hit me like a ton of bricks or I may need to tell them at this point if they don't plan to ask me. Which is not necessarily something I want to do just yet. I hope it doesn't cost me my job. But I am getting to a point that being one person at work and another outside of it is getting harder to do and mentally draining me... Not to mention I don't want to be this male type of person I was before as it was killing me. I mean my hair is getting very long, It was short and spiked I should say when I first became employed here my current job, and recently I left for a short trip in the first week of May and had such a blast and a wonderful time with family, But I came back with my hair dyed some makeup on and my face looking Fleek!!,,, and sporting my girl styled sunglasses coming into work because it was so difficult to go back to who the staff has known me as, that's how far I have come in such a year that I literally don't feel like this male person I was before and I do believe it shows? The past couple weeks it has been sort of different in the building to. I mean not that it's a bad thing just seems different around my boss and other staff. Hopefully I am just over thinking it.. I have observed for months now how the staff moves around me and even caught some conversation pieces that were about me being possibly Transgendered... Although I can only assume though and Assume I will, I do care and love my job, And I care about those around me, and I just want to be O.K. The way I want to live my life seems right to me and that's just how I'm going to do it. And I have to do it as Stacie, Period! I get all praise from my co-workers and that there so grateful to have me apart of this team so I guess I shouldn't worry. But I have been operating as Stacie more mentally with this outer male type of disguise as I have seen it looking back and that kind of scares me. They don't know that person from the inside to the outside yet. How is that going to go over when I start to dress like I want to and fully embrace myself at work finally and just let it all out, you know what I mean?? I know I am still coming out, outwardly and with who I am and have been on the inside sense I was little, and its like an integration re-learning some things again, and aligning my mind set with my altered Biology as much as I can, and it is staying completely stable for once in my life. Maybe coming out will always be just that, Coming out over and over again. Though I am sure I will get to a point where it's just my way of life no biggie, Like, Hi I'm Stacie how are you etc., Observe from time to time how life was before I transitioned etc... I know I'll get there, somewhere eventually. But coming out in a workplace which is my livelihood is a little scary to say the least. Thats a Big step IMO. But here I go and No matter what happens I'm all in!! I mean I am a lot more open than I will give myself credit for, I just hope I don't make people feel awkward, But I can't control others' emotions or views, So I'll keep doing just me!! Anyways I could go on and talk for hours on how almost half the year has been and what I did but it would be a novel... I plan to share more of my experience with you though. Like post more testimonial, my life's journey etc. I do Love though to read your Lifes journeys more. In the meantime, all the Best in your Life Adventure, go out and enjoy it, who cares what anyone else has to say about it, I've actually been surprised at the response I have gotten going out in public fully presenting as Stacie H. Don't let the world bring you down and be who you are, Remember you're not alone! Hope to See You Out There!! Stacie H.
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