Having Trouble Stepping Into The Woman's Section.

[Guest Madison_Always]

I too get irrarionally nervous sometimes when shopping. After many purchases though, I have come to the conclusion that no one really cares. My advice is just take a deep breath and go for it. Everyone else will be so wraped up in their own lives they will likely take no notice of what someoe else is doing. Good luck.

[Guest nurseling]

I believe it all comes down to self confidence. If you walk in feeling like you belong there, no one will question. Know what you want so if a salesperson asks, you can tell them, be led to it, and not worry about wondering around looking lost. Remember, if a salesperson is not helping you, they are doing something they hate because the manager said to. That or trying to hide from said manager. The large majority of salespeople and cashiers could really care a less what you buy. The nicest and most helpful I have found, believe it or not, are in aerie (personal favorite) and victoria secrets. Smile, be yourself, and enjoy shopping. And if they have a problem, tough tampons. So go forth and fill your closet with shoes, most of the salespeople are on commission so they don't care as long as you buy.

nurseling

[Guest KatyDesire]

Haven't yet plucked up the courage. Whenever I approach the women's section my cheeks go a bright purple and I feel mlike they are flashing like neon lights! Goos to know I'm not the only one, and that one gets over it eventually.

[Guest Chrissy6455]

I used to have the same problem, I used ot make my wife get what I wanted becasue i was too scared of being Judged, then After I came out to myself, and my first shopping trip still presenting as male went to store and bought some stuff and tried some stuff on and really I don't think anyone actually even seemed to care less what I was doing, not even the lady who was watching the changing rooms.

I think this is the same fear or at least a portion of it that makes alot of us at one point repress who we really are.

[Guest MrMxyzptlk]

I prefer using second hand stores. There is one in a nearby town that I love. They call it "The Free Store" because they don't have prices on the stuff, you just drop some cash in the jar as you leave. So I grab a bag and walk through the womens section until I find what I want. I got a skirt, shirt and two pairs of shoes today. Real cute stuff.

I hate to say "man up" when talking about shopping for bras and panties but really don't think most people give a hoot.

Oh, when I need to get something very specific sized, like lingere, I go to Walmart. They have a self checkout. I grab a pack of soda and then hit the womens section tossing in what I want. Then I hit the self checkout. no strange looks or questions you don't want to answer.

Rochelle/Scott

[Candykane]

Two more ideas that might help. Consignment shops and goodwill are great to start. There is no womens undies in these places so you can be shopping for your wife a surprise for her.

The other is one I used when I was in my early teens I would ask a sales lady if she could help me. I knew my size so I wrote the things I wanted on a list. I would tell the sales lady I was uncomfortable doing this but my Mom was inlured last year and I am trying to shop for her. WOW lots of sympathy and praise for a wonderful son "your mother must be very proud of you " It is a bit Cheeky as the Brits would say, but after a few visits I felt comfortable shopping for me.

Candy Kane

[Guest alexiaannalise]

i have a problem shopping in my home town cuz my family is real well known here so if i dont have my girlfriend with me then i cant really cant do it unless its around christmas time and then i can do it as long as they think its for her but its kind of a hassle and a pain so i would much rather have her there with me

Love

Alexia Annalise

[Guest DanD]

i didnt have troubles with the clothing so much, but similar situations, ;like restrooms. its easier to do if you had a freind or two with you who is that gender too. male restrooms? id walk in with a male freind or two, makes it safe, keeps people from wondering if im one of the boys or not. i figure it would work the same for a MTF at a clothing store. nobody really notices or anything if youre picking out clothes so much, you could be buying them for someone else after all..as for the dressing rooms, like i said, have a friend there with you, it might help,even if theyre not actually IN the space with you, but by the door.

[Guest MrMxyzptlk]

Today I stopped at a discount store and poked around for stuff, I found 25 cent a pack pantyhose so I snagged a couple. When I got to the counter the smart alek cashier girl said "do you think those are your color?" I told her "the catfish will think they are fabulous" and I explained that I will be using them as a method of baiting hooks for catfish to hold the more loose baits togather while letting the "flavor" soak out through the fabric. The look on her face was priceless.

I may actualy use them for that as I think they are too sheer for my blemished and hairy legs.

[Michelle 2010]

Two more ideas that might help. Consignment shops and goodwill are great to start. There is no womens undies in these places so you can be shopping for your wife a surprise for her.

The other is one I used when I was in my early teens I would ask a sales lady if she could help me. I knew my size so I wrote the things I wanted on a list. I would tell the sales lady I was uncomfortable doing this but my Mom was inlured last year and I am trying to shop for her. WOW lots of sympathy and praise for a wonderful son "your mother must be very proud of you " It is a bit Cheeky as the Brits would say, but after a few visits I felt comfortable shopping for me.

Candy Kane

OK Girlfriends,

now here's another update on how to settle in to being your true feminine girly, girly, yes, go ahead and say it out loud......"girly self"..... I have posted before that "new to me " shops are great in my town. If you live in a blighted area, maybe go to the next town over where your sisters have class and money ok? You want to pick through other ladies treasures not trash right? So find a niiice "new to me" shop... Save Kohl's or Macy's for later... When you exude the lady like confidence that is waiting to blossom.

Now, having selected the store worthy of your time, you go in feeling like the lady you are, not a timid rabbit... "But Michelle...", you say, "Michelle, how do I do this if I really feel like the rabbit????"

I'm glad you asked... The secret is... (whisper),,,people leave you alone...

Even as you work your way down the row looking at all the wonderful options you get to coordinate and later accessorize as a woman, people leave you alone... If a woman is working the same aisle, be polite and smile Say something nice (not clever) and smile.... Never, never, never, fight a woman for a garment! It is bad form....

Oh, and don't waste time making eye contact with men in the store, they aren't worth you effort and energy. Remember, you aren't there to impress men. You are there to purchase garments that make you feel feminine and hopefully make other women jealous of how goood you look.

You may ask, "Michelle, what if the counter girl is a smart alec mall rat, waiting to pounce and smirk???" I'm glad you asked.

This just happened to me. I went into a boutique new to me store (yes ladies have money and class here) and the counter lady was not the usual... In fact, she looked suspiciously like a mall rat... I had to make an instant decision! Stake my claim as a shopper with class and dignity, or flee like the above mentioned timid rabbit. So, since I was shopping pants for the first time and was confused on sizing, I met her gaze and smiled. When she asked "May I help you?" I walked over to her and said, "Yes, I am shopping for myself for pants appropriate for church (true), and don't understand the sizing..." Now here's the really really important thing... I said, "Can you help me?" She was immediately taken out of any perceived problem and into finding a solution. I had immediately removed conjecture as to my motives by simply stating I was buying pants for me... and I needed help. Ultimately, we talked about what college she was going to go to and we were great friends by the time i left.

Lastly, (for now), you may ask, "Michelle honey, how do I acquire the confidence that you have to perform so flawlessly????" Well, the answer is..."ya just gotta get going and start doing it" After all, remember, there are no mistakes, only lessons.

Hugs

Michelle

[Guest Prettypolly1389]

I have had similar experiences as most of you. I almost had a panic attack the first time I shopped. I also have to see who is around me when I am browsing. If there seem to be several big men about, I chicken out. If I have chosen and picked an item, I always look for a short queue. Once at the check out, I also ask for a receipt.

But it is worth all the hassle. I then cannot wait to get home and try the time on.

[Guest MsGsptlsnz]

'Twas the day of my outing to my beloved spouse

We weren't really speaking, not even to grouse.

My clothing was hidden in boxes with care,

In hopes they'd be safe from my wife on a tear.

Our son was oblivious to wifely dread,

While visions of Pokeman danced in his head.

So with cash in my pocket and pain in my heart,

I set out for Goodwill my hurt with to part.

Away to their aisles I sprang like a flash

Holding back anger and feeling quite brash

When what to my wandering eye should appear

but a pink spanedex dress in a size I am near!

With a neckline and sleaves at the right fit

I knew in a moment I had to get it!

More shopping uncovered a new strapless bra

And stockings of white just my size, oh la la!

New shoes for this outfit elude me the did

So to the chekout I rushed like a candy store kid.

To the next little shop! To the the next little mall!

I dashed away, dashed away all!

As the next little shop of consigned goods went I

To look all around for shoes that caught eye.

So downstairs and up I wandered anew

To find the perfect high heel platform shoe.

And then with a twinkling I saw on display

For prancing and dancing the shoe of the day!

As I drew in sharp breath and Iooked all around

Size 11 they said and my frown turned upside down!

They were covered in silver form open toe to back strap

And the heel was stilletto with five inches, no cra....

The color, the style, they all were my fave

They looked like what angels would wear to a rave.

With a glimer in eye and twist of my head

I grabed up those pumps and I'll buy these I said.

The clerk and I spoke a few words without jest

Then I spoted some earings that I loved best.

So laying my finges on a few of my bills

I paid for the lot and headed for the hills.

The dress it fit and in I I did revel,

Showing off curves of foam and gel

The shoes I did walk in and they felt so right

So Happy Shopping to all and to all a good night!

[Guest]

WOW ditto to everything above! Ooh I want to tell my tales. I found a pair of shoes I dearly loved, slipped them on, they felt like a dream. Quickly back in the box. A week later my ex-wife stayed with me. In an intimate moment I excused my self went to the walk-in closet and slipped on my favorite dress. I peeked out the door and said there is someone i want you to meet. Wow what a wonderful romantic night. The next day we went to the shoe store, her as my decoy and she bought me the shoes! I still wear them out regularly as raggedy as they are getting. I want to have them bronzed. Giggle. We then went to the Goodwill. At first I was worried about the looks. I did a "Helen Keller" and shopped with my mate as girl friends. The stares turned to smiles as they watched us shop. I didn't make any bones that they were for me. Isle by isle the clothes piled up. The highlight was my ex would put each up to me and say "what do you think about these?" Some I liked, others I said " I don't like the color, I don't like the cut, I don't like the style. That's just not me." and picked up the ones I wanted. She whispered in my ear, "You know your a picky (B-word)!" I died laughing because it.s true! Alas, our romance ended for the finale time soon after, though we always share girl stuff together.

A few months later I was in Wal-Mart. I asked the young girl in the woman's department for help. With a funny look she politely tried to direct me to man's. I said "Oh no honey, I seldom wear man's clothes they are too baggy and have all the style of a tea bag! Men fashions are simply horrible. Yuck!" She showed me around and we laughed and gabbed together for quite a while.

Fast forward to today; I shop and know most every one that works in the Goodwill stores on my end of the city and many other shops, Every time I shop it's "Jody's back... where have you been?" I feel loved and spend money, what more could a girl want? Mostly female strangers clue in quickly I'm female brained and are comfortable shopping with me like any other female, no matter what gender I'm dressed as. The exception is when her hubby is around then she has to play the indignant wife role for him. I just smile knowingly and shop on.

It's all a learned behavior so don't let the fears slow you down on your education, The rewards are awesome! Jody

[Guest Sarah E]

Aw this thread brings back so many memories! My first shopping experience was something I'd wanted to do for months but I kept bottling it. Then one day during midweek I ventured into one of the department stores for the third time that day and I saw a pay point with just the female cashier there. She was young as I recall but I judged that she looked friendly. Suddenly found myself grabbing a skirt and a blouse that I wanted. I wasn't entirely sure of the sizes but I steeled myself to go for the the till, went over there quickly before I could bottle it, and paid for it. I think I just said something like it was a present for my mother or something. But once I'd done it once it got easier and easier. As it turned out the skirt was the right size and the blouse was a size larger than I really needed but hey, I'd done it )

After a year or so it got to the point where I just didn't worry and brazenly went up and paid for clothes without a care in the world. I'm sure that some of the shop assistants in town had clocked me but I didn't care by then and they were always great. They probably see many guys buying female clothes and are possibly even trained to deal with it. Funny thing is though, I always avoided being served by the male cashiers and always made sure a woman served me.

Buying make-up is hard in guy mode and I never did get over that one though (

[Guest MsGsptlsnz]

Buying make-up is hard in guy mode and I never did get over that one though

That one is still hard for me. I don't know why. I will walk up to the counter with an armload of heels, skirts, tops and stockings and not blink an eye. But into the cosmetics section and I am sure my mommy is going to come around the corner and paddle my little behind...

Very weird.