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I Have No Idea What To Do


Guest Temmy

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To pass. I have no clue. I don't have the most masculine of bodies but I'm a long way from being anything resembling female... I have no experience with makeup or anything...

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  • Forum Moderator

There are so many facets to transforming your appearance to female. Number 1 is attitude. No matter how good anything else is if the attitude is wrong it just won't work.

You have to accept yourself as a woman-Your body isn't what determines that- and let the woman inside take control. You have probably been watching and identifying with women for a long time without even being aware of it and so when you let yourself become a woman the gestures and body language begin to occur naturally.

The voice is also important and the girls will have to give you advise on that.

The rest is largely window dressing. It's hard to tell from your profile pic what your eyebrows and features are really like so I can't give any advise there except that a well shaped brow is a must.

And of course HRT which seems to soften and feminize so many women. How much varies but the differences I've seen have been remarkable.

Hope some of this helps. It is a very complex subject.

Hugs

John

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Um, in terms of features my face is predominantly feminine apart from my nose, which is huge, and my eyebrows, which are thick... they're what ruin it. I don't know if I'm confident enough to change my attitude that much though..

Thank you for your advice.

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Hi Temmy,

John is correct about attitude, gestures, and voice. This site has lots of information on getting started, plus there are quite a few youtube videos about makeup and such.

Do you by chance have any local Transgendered support groups, and/or LGBT groups? Many have frequent meetings and you can get potential support/help that way. Also, be observant the next time you are in a mall or grocery market. How are the women your age dressed, etc. ? It is easy as a new MtF to be overly dressed for a casual setting, and you will get outed.

I am sure others will be along to give other suggestions. This will take time, relax and enjoy the journey and successes!

Huggs,

Opal

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  • Forum Moderator

You are welcome any time. And what I meant by attitude is just let yourself be the true you inside and feel like the woman you are. Sure confidence helps but sometimes it takes some positive experiences to build that up. The first transformation is when you say I am a woman! Not I want to be a woman-because you already are if you are MtF. Born a woman. Just set her free inside and it changes everything.

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Guest JaniceW

Hi Temmy,

John has really hit the mail on th head for you when he said it is the attitude that makes the biggest difference. Realizing that you are a woman and that you have always been a woman. That you have playing a role for all these years. Finally deciding to stop playing that role and let the real you come on through, that is the single most important factor in "passing". Why, because it changes "passing" into "being". If you are a woman than there is no problem. The other things, make-up, voice, deportment, and fashion thay can all be learned over time.

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Guest NotClaire

I've been seen as a girl while in guy clothes with my big nose and big eyebrows... prolly cause I act girly. So yeah, attitude = :excl:

Other than that... passing involves growing your hair, trimming your eyebrows, using oodles of moisturizing lotion, use conditioner in your hair (and only wash it a couple times each week... unless you have a dirty/sweaty job)

For makeup - less is more. When I present as a girl I wear a tiny bit of eyeliner and a little bit of foundation where needed.

For clothing - don't go extreme fem (unless that matches your personality). I pass better in andro-ish girl clothes

Hormones will definitely give you softer/lighter skin and a more feminine mind-set and be like icing on the cake of your prep work

Good luck, stay positive, and SMILE :D

peace and love!

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