Feels Like Forever...

[Guest My_Genesis]

Hey everyone! I feel like I haven't been around for ages! lol. I think it's been about a month and a half though. So I thought I should let you all know I am still alive... and still haven't started T yet...

So I went to my endo on the 20th of November and he told me we would wait til 3 months since I got my Depo shot (which brings me to mid-January) before starting me on T. He says that at first T gets converted to E and we don't want that. I figure this doesn't make much sense because about 95% of the time guys go directly on T, and if that is an issue, wouldn't it be done differently?

I "came out to myself" at 17, planned on not transitioning til after I finish undergrad, then came to the conclusion a year ago that I cannot function any longer living a fake life and starting T isn't even an option, it's something I have to do. So I figure, it's been long enough, I could choose my own dr, and logically I don't agree with this dr's approach. I saw another dr on dec. 20th - I only got out of school last Friday - and then again 2 days later (Wed.) for blood because for whatever reason they poked me 5 times but couldn't draw blood. Got my T script on Wed. Have a follow-up appointment on the 5th. I just need to bring in my script and he'll show me how to self-inject.

That puts me at about 4 weeks on T by the time I go back to school, as opposed to starting right when the semester starts, at the earliest - probably even later - had I stuck with the other dr.

Some small issues here: They said they take my insurance but then the dr. himself told me he doesn't. I don't know what that's about. The receptionist - who, by the way, is MTF and also a patient of his - told me someone came in a few weeks before me and supposedly they don't take his insurance, but when she put it through the system, although the insurance company hasn't reimbursed them yet, they haven't rejected the visits. So she's hoping the same thing happens for me, but until then I have to pay in full. Initial visit is $200 and follow-ups are $100. Problem now is I'm gonna need a bit of help paying for the follow-up, and may have to completely empty my bank account. So I applied for a full-time job near home where they are now hiring, while I am on break, but if that doesn't work out I have to wait until I go back to school and until then I will be flat out BROKE. I also couldn't buy any gifts because of this. I figured it's about time I'm selfish and spend money on my own needs before others'. I mean, it's selfless enough that I lived as a girl for so long, trying not to "burden" anyone with it, right??

So that's where I'm at. I have mixed feelings about the semester coming up - I am excited that I will be back in school, but I was so unhappy this past semester, didn't like my classes or the fact I wasn't on T - that I'm worried I may end up not liking my classes again. But I think just being on T will make me more motivated and less depressed. And hopefully I will have a &*$@# job!!! lol.

And finally... I hope everyone had a good holiday, or vacation, or whatever you celebrate this time of year! The best thing about it for me was that my parents didn't use my birth name on any of my gifts. The gifts were from both of them, but only my dad has changed over to using my male name to address me. So my mom must've at least been okay with using it on the gifts, otherwise it wouldn't have been on there, haha.

[Carolyn Marie]

Hey, RJ, great to see you again. Happy Holidays, and all that.

Congrats on the T. I guess it does pay to shop around for the right doc. Some are just too conservative for their own good, or inexperienced, or some combination thereof. But as with most things, there is a cloud inside you silver lining, eh? Hopefully

the insurance will cover everything, and even if not, once you get past the initial regimen of tests and consultations, it shouldn't

cost much. But I know the up front costs are high.

Good luck with the job and with school. Have a good semester, and I hope to see you around more often.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Sally]

Congratulations RJ, it is a big step but one that you had to make in order to get back on track in school.

Now that things are beginning to fall a bit better into place - I am sure that you will have a job.

Love ya,

Sally