Hayley's Story

[Guest Hayley21]

Hello all you beautiful people, Im so sorry it took me this long to do a bio its just I've been busy with life in general, posting on topics here, going to the chatroom etc... Ok anyways please forgive me if I leave out anything that doesn't correspond with my "about me" section on my profile.

Ok here it goes:

My names Hayley Alexis C. I'm from a very very small town here in southern arkansas, I'm 21 yrs old and I live with my parents. At a very young age around 4 or 5 I knew there was something wrong with myself, I would always ask my mom what that thing "down there" was lol, She would tell me an I can always remember saying "I don't like it", Anyways as my life went on I started discovering that I was attracted to guys but not from a guys point of view but from a girls eye. I mean I would make comments to myself like a genetic girl would make, I knew right then there was something wrong here. Going through school I would always hang around girls, talk to girls, always picked a girl as a partner in school projects etc... In high school I skipped out on my junior an senior prom due to me not being able to wear those gorgeous dresses. I know I speak alot of not being depressed or angry but the truth is, I am I am very depressed an angry, I can't understand WHY I couldn't be born a female? I mean I love everything there is about being a female, the make -up, the clothes, the way I carry myself etc... I know to certain exint we all feel the sameway. Anyways, back to school, I was always looked at as being gay "course I would always laugh at them" becuz they had no idea what I really was inside. But one day I decided I had to tell someone so I told one of my girls that was a close friend an until this day she has stuck by me which led to telling other people "girls", an so far I have about 15 girls that knows about me and they all say I've always been like one of the girls. And one guy that I grew up with I told him an he's very supportive. As for my family, no-one knows but my mom an she's kinda ify sorta, I mean shes supportive but still wondering, she ask me questions an I answer them the best way I can. I mean atleast she is trying to understand an not judging me. I think I was very fortunate with looks I get them from my mom an daddy there both very good looking so I guess I got there genes. I can remember when I turned 16 I started shaving my legs, taken showers like twice a day, going with my mom an getting manacures, having my nails cleaned etc...I have really taken care of myself. But anyways I know its a long hard road ahead but I'm more than willing to whatever it takes to be the person I should've been. I don't blame GOD or anyone for my mishap, but I do often wonder about it. I recently took a test a gender test an scored high on the female side an I was honest, which that really built my confidence up way up!! My father which I call my daddy is a great guy, but has a temper than even hell couldn't touch LOL, course I guess with all he's been through with the marines I guess he deserves to be that way. He has no idea about my situation he thinks I'm gay which I think is very funny LOL, But oh well maybe one day I'll build up enough confidence to tell him, "I hardly doubt it" LOL.

Ok Now I've been on HRT for about no I have been on HRT for 3 months now, an can see some minor changes like my chest an skin to be honest, I know people react differently to HRT I'm just wondering if I'm one of those people that HRT is going to really be noticable in the early stages. Oh well guess we'll see. I have very very very serious about having surgery the "SRS", that completes my puzzle, I can't wait till that day comes. Now alittle bit of a personal note here.

When I was 12 years old I suffered kidney failure which means I'm having to do dialysis, I had a transplant back a few years ago but eventually failed, so now I'm back on dialysis. I have insurance which covers my HRT but actually wondering if it would cover my SRS? prolly not. But oh well so see my life hasn't been a bed of roses. So I surely hope this helped you to get to know me alittle better. I sure do love this place an the people I've talked to so far. Thank you for taking the time an reading this

Hayley

[Guest Emily Ray]

Thank you Hayley for telling us more about yourself. I hope you are indeed one of the lucky ones that grow fast on HRT. My skin softened early and my body hair thined early, but the girls are on the slow train to nova scotia.

Huggs

Emily

[Guest JaniceW]

Thanks Hayley,

That was a really good introduction. You certainly have led an interesting life so far. Your attitude is refreshing and your hope for the future is enheartening.

You are a really great addition to our family here. I am glad you have joined us.

[Carolyn Marie]

Thanks for posting your bio, hon. That took a lot of thought, and a lot of work. It is very much appreciated.

You have been through a lot in your life, kidney failure not the least of it. Have you done any research on whether kidney problems would interfere with or preclude SRS? I have no idea, myself. All I know is that diabetes does not preclude the surgery. If you got approved for HRT, that seems like a good sign.

Best of luck with your transition, hon. Please keep posting your progress.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[JJ]

Hi Hayley,

That's great about the changes you're already seeing on HRT. And I appreciated you sharing your history.

My nephew was on dialysis for awhile. He was a brittle diabetic from early childhood and ended up on dialysis twice . My daughter was his medical driver because he had to go about 150 miles for treatment. His first transplant failed after 3 years and his second did due to an infection in the organ the Drs failed to catch but his last one has been over 6 years now and he is doing great. I know how hard dialysis is on your body and hope you can have another transplant soon.

We love having you here! I know when I see you name that it will be a loving and supportive post. I hope we can meet one day-maybe at the support group. I joined but won't be able to attend till summer at least.

I admire the way you handle the difficulties you have faced!

Hugs

John

[Guest Hayley21]

Awwww this is why I love it here, for all of you an what you say! I'm so glad you liked my bio, its really not all there LOL, but maybe one day I'll get on here an conclude it. Again thank you so much for taking the time an reading it an giving me such warm thoughts, I love all of you an your surely a huge part of my heart

Hayley

[Guest miss kindheart]

Dear Hayley,

<<< hug >>>

Thank you for sharing your heart felt story

I have heard of a few insurance Co that will pay for the actual SRS procedure.

Several will pay for incidentals that go along with the SRS procedure.

things like the hospital ECT , this is often close to about half of the total cost in the US.

It usually has to be pre-approved and coded properly

Just check with you insurance CO and the DR you might use.

vanna

[Guest Chiv]

Hayley,

Thanks for sharing. You are a joyful young woman and I am really glad you are here.

John

[Guest Rainydays]

Hi Hayley,

It was rather interesting reading your own account insofar and getting to know you a little better.

~April

[Guest Lacey Lynne]

Hayley:

Great bio, girl! Very interesting and fun read. Wow! You've got a lot to deal with especially for somebody so young. Your attitude is tops! From what I've seen on The Playground, you are very positive, supportive and well-liked. You're so welcome here and we're glad you're here.

That you have to dialyze at your age is sad; however, you deal with it so well, it seems to me. May all the happiness and joy you seek come your way. Know what? I believe it will!

Peace & Happiness to You! Lacey