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So What Is It Exactly? Pls Tell Me!


Guest Gabi-lotr

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Guest Gabi-lotr

If i right, every bi-gender persons is switching between behaviours and attitude and mind condition (aka inner gender), depending on the situations.

I am right? Please correct me if im wrong...

I just found out that if in some situations better to be a man then i become a man in the things listed above, and vica versa.

Now what? It means that im bi-gender?

Girls or boys experience this attitude changing things or they just stay in only one that related to their inner gender?

Whats your bi-gender experiences if you bi-gender? PLS tell me!

Thanks!

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Guest Elizabeth K

Well I was not sure about the 'bi-gender' so I looked it up.

Wikipedia:

Bigender or bi-gender (bi+gender) describes a tendency to move between feminine and masculine 'gender-typed behavior*' depending on context, expressing a distinctly "en femme" persona and a distinctly "en homme" persona, feminine and masculine respectively. It is recognized by the American Psychological Association (APA) as a subset of the transgender group. [not in citation given] A 1999 survey conducted by the San Francisco Department of Public Health observed that, among the transgendered community, less than 3% of those who were genetic males and less than 8% of those who were genetic females identified as bigender.

While an androgynous person retains the same 'gender-typed behavior*' across situations, the bigendered person consciously or unconsciously changes their 'gender-role behavior*' from primarily masculine to primarily feminine, or vice versa.

[*I dislike this term - what IS gender type behavior? Undefinable in most cases]

I can't answer other than to say I playacted male for 50 plus years. Although I am full time now, and my mindset has always been female, I know how to defend myself with male behavior. My therapist says I will probably always revert to male defenses in panic situations - which is okay as these work - EXCEPT I forget I have a woman's body strength now. I have to watch that I guess - but it is almost impossible to remember I am weaker , and I am probably gonna get hurt, someday.

Daily living - I just can't tell what is typically male and what is typically female anymore, they all are just me. I feel I have pretty much slipped into the female spectrum, but I was really probably always there.

Even now, switching back and forth (which rarely happens) is different on estrogen than it was on testosterone. I was happy to see that.

PLUS - Everyone is really both female and male, regardless of gender. It seems the 'learned' behavior and the 'social conditioning' tempers that.

I am not sure if the bi-gender thinking undefined but shown above, follows what I had to endure or not. I suspect it is something 'stand alone.' So transpeople are probably not really bigendered. But if androgne people aren't either, then bigendered is a totally independent category of gender dysphoria.

I hope this helps

Lizzy

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Guest Miss_Construe

I had experience something like that, and still my personality shifts depending on the situation. For myself I came to understand that I was being too sensitive to changes in myself. Now I still change personalities depending on the situation, but they are often shades of the same color.

Hope this helps,

<3

Amy

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Guest Gabi-lotr

I hoped and expected that my question will reveal things and sort out things but not. Instead the answers just mess me up more than before...

But anyway it help...Now i just need to figure out that im learned those thngs or when i am man then its me or just a learned thing....

ehh...lots of things to think about...

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Guest ~Brenda~

Gabi hon,

I would relax on trying to define if you are bi-gender or not. Indeed, I am in that state where I represent as needed. Reflecting both genders at times is a reality of most of us.

Just because one must represent one gender, does not mean that they feel that gender inside. We all must balance who we know we are with the perception of others who think we are. This is not easy, and is very complicated.

It takes time and effort to bring you and the world into one place.

Transitioning is not trivial.

Love

Brenda

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Guest Elizabeth K

I hoped and expected that my question will reveal things and sort out things but not. Instead the answers just mess me up more than before...

But anyway it help...Now i just need to figure out that im learned those thngs or when i am man then its me or just a learned thing....

ehh...lots of things to think about...

Hon

We just don't know. We have our own experiences, but we are not anywhere close to being gender therapists.

I know it gets confusing - and do stay with us. Maybe someone has more experience that relates better to you.

Lizzy

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Guest Micha

If i right, every bi-gender persons is switching between behaviours and attitude and mind condition (aka inner gender), depending on the situations.

Sounds close enough I guess.

Well I was not sure about the 'bi-gender' so I looked it up.

Wikipedia:

Bigender or bi-gender (bi+gender) describes a tendency to move between feminine and masculine 'gender-typed behaviorWhile an androgynous person retains the same 'gender-typed behavior*' across situations, the bigendered person consciously or unconsciously changes their 'gender-role behavior' from primarily masculine to primarily feminine, or vice versa.

[*I dislike this term - what IS gender type behavior? Undefinable in most cases]

It seems like the APA description is the same as yours, moving from male to female, or from female to male.

I agree with Lizzy though, about gender type behavior. Each individual may have there own ideas about how women and men are supposed to act and be treated, but there's really no established definition of gender roles (and there shouldn't be, ever).

Gabi hon,

I would relax on trying to define if you are bi-gender or not. Indeed, I am in that state where I represent as needed. Reflecting both genders at times is a reality of most of us.

Just because one must represent one gender, does not mean that they feel that gender inside. We all must balance who we know we are with the perception of others who think we are. This is not easy, and is very complicated.

It takes time and effort to bring you and the world into one place.

Transitioning is not trivial.

Love

Brenda

Brenda's right too. ^_^ Don't over think things, that makes everything more difficult than they really need to be.

Personally, I don't have any bigender experience. I'm the same more or less any time of day, or at least the changes are more related to mood and emotion, not gender expression. I do the things I do or act the way I do based on what's needed, not based on gender. Gender is a bad reason for me to do or not to do anything.

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Guest Gabi-lotr

Ehh i always overtink....damit! *like a dwarven fighter*

Ok another thing...

Seems i dont have own personality... I always start sometimes imitating someone who simphatic for me. Its like i almost get into her/his skin and i imagine myself having their body and trying imitating their act and behaviour. I realized that i dont have own personality... Everything about me is just lots of parts of other ppls...

Now what?

Someone experience this? Its weird... Its like i always roleplaying other real ppls... O_O And i always integrate somethings into myself, into my attitude and moving-culture.

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Guest Kendall

i have seen bigender used two ways. most bigender i know almost have a multiple personality. and talk to each other in distinct persons. sometimes called two spirits, sytems, or multi-gender. i have seen up to 6 distinct persons in on person. a few times i have seen it used for genderfluid or genderqueer/androgyne.

kendall

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Guest TheBlackSheep

Ehh i always overtink....damit! *like a dwarven fighter*

Ok another thing...

Seems i dont have own personality... I always start sometimes imitating someone who simphatic for me. Its like i almost get into her/his skin and i imagine myself having their body and trying imitating their act and behaviour. I realized that i dont have own personality... Everything about me is just lots of parts of other ppls...

Now what?

Someone experience this? Its weird... Its like i always roleplaying other real ppls... O_O And i always integrate somethings into myself, into my attitude and moving-culture.

Yes I do this too. It's very strange. I often see people and think about what it is like to be them. This is usually people I don't know rather than the people I do know.

Like you said, it seems like I don't have my own personality. Very strange.

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Guest Chrysee

Just when you think you see the light, here comes something else to think about.

In the definition that Lizzie provided, it stated: " While an androgynous person retains the same 'gender-typed behavior*' "

I have a college education and don't know what that means? I'm androgynous and exactly which 'gender typed behavior' is it that I'm retaining?

Due to financial blocks, I was not able to schedule with the gender therapist that i contacted back in Dec. More than ever, of late, I have felt the need for one. I have been trying to define the masc. & the fem. sides of me for some time now, while avoiding stereotypes. I don't wish to sink to the level of those idiot tests, i.e. "Would you rather fix your motorcycle or bake a cake?"

Anyway, it's early and perhaps I should have stayed off the boards until later in the day.

Sorry, too, that I took the question and made it all about me.

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Guest Gabi-lotr

Its ok Chrysee.

After your post i just think that stereotypes = crap....

I know a girl (gg) who doing real sword fight and she a 'horse'man''...

We need to rid off stereotypes.I also met with a 'true' t-girl who doing very man things. (fixing mechanical thingilingies and computer programming)

So i came to the realization that gender not equals with what you do but what you feels inside.

Best for everyone that to tell this to every yours GTs.

And i think i feel neither or both.

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Guest Micha
So i came to the realization that gender not equals with what you do but what you feels inside.

And i think i feel neither or both.

Exactly. ^_^

I was about to ask if we get rid of stereotypes and gender roles, how do we define gender? What does gender mean?

So I think you're right, and that's the best way to describe it. It's not what you do, how you look or act, but how you feel. :welldone:

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Guest CariadsCarrot

i have seen bigender used two ways. most bigender i know almost have a multiple personality. and talk to each other in distinct persons. sometimes called two spirits, sytems, or multi-gender. i have seen up to 6 distinct persons in on person. a few times i have seen it used for genderfluid or genderqueer/androgyne.

kendall

Kendall, although different alters in multiple personality disorder can be different genders in the same body I would say it's a very different issue than bigender. The way I understand it, with bigender it is the same person having 2 different roles to their personality rather than 2 completely separate personalities. If the 2 (or more) roles were separate enough to be dissociative then I don't think it's bigender, it would be DID or DDNOS.

Having said that, it could look similar to the observer maybe and could be miss-diagnosed maybe.

If there are up to 6 personalities in a person then that sounds to me like a dissociative disorder rather than bigender.

Gabe

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Guest darlene lynn

Hello Everyone

I"ve been thinking about this Gender thing for a few years now. The medical community has thier definitions for US. I tried for years to fit into one of them. Through out my life I never fit as a male or female. I am part male and part female,I know this if no-onelse does. Now I consider myself a blended-gender. I have attributes of both sexes.

Ive considered going through transition but I would still be me.

The main thing is to find you.Not who others say you are. No matter you are a unigue and special person. Dont forget it.

With Love and Respect

Darlene Lynnette

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Guest Syamantaka

Ehh i always overtink....damit! *like a dwarven fighter*

Ok another thing...

Seems i dont have own personality... I always start sometimes imitating someone who simphatic for me. Its like i almost get into her/his skin and i imagine myself having their body and trying imitating their act and behaviour. I realized that i dont have own personality... Everything about me is just lots of parts of other ppls...

Now what?

Someone experience this? Its weird... Its like i always roleplaying other real ppls... O_O And i always integrate somethings into myself, into my attitude and moving-culture.

:) Seems to me you have strong Empathic skills budding, The ability to put yourself

in other peoples shoes can be a great gift. They say do not judge someone untill you have

walked a mile in their shoes, well sounds like you can at will, like myself.

"I AM WHAT I AM, AND THAT'S ALL THAT I AM" POPEYE :)

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Guest Lioness

I agree with some of the other posts that have made their way here so far. One, I believe that everyone does this to an extent. Two, I believe bi-gender really only plays back into the (seemingly inescapable) prescribed gender roles that society places on us.

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