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Help Me With Crossdressing


Guest Natasha Cortez

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Hi Natasha, welcome. Perhaps you cold take a few minutes and stop in at the Introductions Area and post a little about yourself. Most people here at Laura's keep an eye out for new people and say hi. Also...that way we might get a better idea of what kind of help and support you are looking for... for instance, help with shoes or help with a troubled spouse or help with understanding what crossdressing is. Yep people are right, lots of support herefriends.gif

Best wishes

Michelle

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Guest Natasha Cortez

Well like how do i start? How can I get the friends that Crossdress in my city to help me buy clothes? How can I keep this secret from my parents? I really want to crossdress but its hard when your 14... :(

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Guest Natasha Cortez

But what if I want to buy lingerie? Wont it be weird for a 14 year old to buy bras and panties for his "sister"?

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A crossdresser that likes Victoria's Secret? Go figure...wink.gif J/k, Lol! Its every CDers idea of heaven on earth!

Regarding your question, of getting friends to buy you stuff, I strongly recommend you do not just seek out new "friends" to buy you stuff. In the days of the internet it could be very dangerous. a better strategy is to look for a glbt youth organization in your city. Get to know some people, don't just look for a source of clothing.

Many CDers started by "borrowing" female family members clothing, but there is a high likelihood of eventually being discovered. Are you ready to deal with that possibility? Older people buy off the internet but you can't do that.

so I agree with Kat, if you don't want to purchase yourself, it should be a friend. Don't rely on people you haven't gotten to know.

Best wishes

Michelle

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Guest Julie T

Natasha

Welcome to Laura's Playground. We have many young people here, and we have many younger people who crossdress, or as I like to say, who sometimes love expressing their feminine nature.

How to buy clothes? I suggest you act like it is no big deal. Clerks usually just let it go by, some don't even notice, if you just act like you are just doing what you always do, ho-hum. We call it attitude. I do know its hard to do that at first? Acting nervous sets off an alarm with clerks, usually that you may be shoplifting.

And you might have a cover story? I had several but never used them. One is easy, if asked, pull out a piece of paper, pretend to read it, and say, 'Yes, that's right' and put the paper away. You can add these are for your sister who cannot shop on her own. If the clerk is still rude, say your sister is mentally challenged, but it is none of the clerks business. Saying you are shopping for a girlfriend only works with something that could be a gift. Another story is to say 'yes these are mine' and glare back, but that is for an emergency.

And the more important problem is something you have not mentioned? Where will you store these new clothes? Its almost a guarantee your mom will find them, eventually. You will have to out yourself to her if that happens, so think about that?

We don't promote deception, especially with parents. We are not advocating that you should try crossdressing or anything like that. We really are just trying to help you cope with your gender dysphoria, and cross dressing is included in that: you see a female part of yourself that others don't know is there. We want you to learn to accept yourself as you are, and be happy.

Julie

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  • Forum Moderator

Cross dressing is not a crime, however it's really misunderstood by most people.

When I was 14 (early 70's) I used to "borrow" my sister's and mom's clothes, I kept stashes in my basement room and was able to return them without detection, it was not easy to express these feelings then, I feel for ya.

It was not until I was in my early 20's when I started buying my own bras and panties, and had to build up my courage.

VS clerks in today's world are very professional and do not question males buying lingerie at all, in fact they encourage it (they just want the $).

Best wishes Natasha

Cindy -

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Guest Krisina

If you are buying lingerie they will just think you are buying it for your girlfriend :)

You'll be fine once you get over the feeling of buying stuff in the womens department versus the mens department. Same goes for buying any other womens/ girls clothing too!

Krisina

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  • 4 weeks later...
Guest DonniDarkness

I shop as a guy for all my girl stuff.

I walk in head held high and shop. Remember your money is as green as the person next to you.

I have never once been confronted by anyone for shopping in the women's section.

When i need to try something on, i use the mens changing rooms, because i am dressed and presenting male. If the store your shopping at does not have a mens changing room ask the Sales clerk, they will let you use the rooms if there are not other women using them at that time. Always be appropriate and polite, it will go a long way in getting the help you need.

Some stores that i shop at know me by first name, and i have even been shopping with my family and received excellent discretion.

So my best advice to give you is: try not to be nervous, just shop like you want to buy the whole store, ask for help if you need it

All department stores have policies against discrimination, the sales clerks go thru classes usually that scare them to death! (had a conversation with a Ross: Dress for Less clerk once about men shopping in the womens section, she was polite and incredibly curious about Crossdressers. A very cool convorsation. And she only asked after seeing me there many times trying things on)

So just be yourself and enjoy!

-Donni-

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Guest Melissa21

Hi!

I also need some guidance, but this is not with regard to clothes. I am a private crossdresser with no strong ambitions (at least not yet) to go public as a female. I DO, however, like to go out with some suggestive (not blatant) padding/shaping to make me look and feel on the feminine side. The problem I have is that, while my left hip and buttock are full and (especially with an added pad) looks very nice, my right side is more masculine, drab, and boring. Can anyone direct me somewhere to help me get subtle customized pads?

Thanks!

Melissa

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Guest kimberly c

Hi Melissa, they do make a panty that has padding on the sides and back to make your shape more feminine. You

can buy at any lingerie store or online.

Love Kim

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Guest Melissa21

HI, Kim. Thanks for the response. I know about the pads, etc. Believe me, I've spent enough on them! My complication is that the product from those places assume that one's genetic body (while not as feminine as one might like) is symmetric. So, the right side pads are mirror images of the left. What I need are pads where the right and left are individually customized to compensate for the fact that my left and right sides are different. : ( I know about Classic Curves, but I was wondering if there was a better approach or if anyone out there may have already dealt with this and could give me the benefit of her experience. I know that I can add padding manually to compensate (been doing that for years. ; ) ) but I would really like a single simple garment that is customized.

Does anyone have any ideas beside Classic Curves?

Thanks!

Melissa

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Guest Melissa21

Gosh, girls. I was kind of hoping that you, who have been gabbing for a while, would have some thoughts to help me. Nothing?

Surprised,

Melissa

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Guest ChloëC

Hi Melissa,

There are only a few cross-dressers who get on here regularly, so don't be surprised if it takes awhile for an answer. And this particular forum being what it is, is also not heavily frequented by the ts people. Also, the question you're asking about specific special padding, well, I guess not too many here purchase it. If I have needed something in the past, I tend to try to cut and shape my own. I worked in a foam cutting shop for about a year so I'm a little familiar with the various grades and types and what it takes to get a decent cut.

Being from southeast Michigan, I have tended to keep suggesting/recommending Janet's Closet. My guess is if they don't have what you're looking for, they might know some place that does.

Hugz

Chloë

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Guest Melissa21

Thanks, Chloe!

I guess I got spoiled when Kim responded so quickly to my first post. Sorry about that. Thanks a lot for your recommendation about Janet's Closet. I will check them out!

Thanks for the hugz, too. I needed that. : )

All the best,

Melissa

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