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A Shy, Misanthropic, Cross-dressing Pseudo-bisexual.


Guest deglerious

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Guest deglerious

Hello all,

I guess that I'm a relatively, shy, misanthropic, cross-dressing bisexual, as I'm more interested in the parts, so to speak, than of getting into any kind of crazy relationship with anyone but my straight and oblivious (as in, doesn't know anything about my 'play') SO; therefore, I 'play' by myself in a very private world of my own, and out in the woods, usually.

I started feeling a twitching between male and female attraction right after hitting puberty in my preteens, but I favored females, and still do. I started cross-dressing with whatever I could find (no sisters) in my very early teens, and also experimented with various items in pseudo-phallic, anal 'play'.

In the middle of High School I had a friend, of whom we both later discovered, also had a thing for ladies "unmentionables". After cross-dressing together and then 'experimenting' a couple of times, we finally, well mostly anyway, 'did it', in that when we first tried we were only part way successful, as he was in too much pain to go 'all the way', but after trading places (which is what I secretly really wanted to begin with) I completely lost my 'female' virginity (as well as general virginity, as I'd never lain with a lady before) to him, just as he lost his 'male' virginity to me. Unfortunately, I became embarrassed and had to get away, as I was still in denial, and would be for quite some time. I think that there were a couple of times afterwards that we both wanted to 'try' again, but we were both scared and embarrassed, if not just simply ashamed.I often think about those times, and am sometimes tempted to try to contact him, as we lost touch shortly after high school, but since I've never cheated on my SO, I think it's best to stay away. and remain in my own private world.

I've acquired and then (regrettably) discarded various intimates, clothing and toys over the years, for use when I 'sneak out' every now and again, whenever the urge (and opportunity) hit me, but I've never quite gotten all the things I would really like, although I've done alright for the most part.

I spend most of my time in the woods when in my alter ego, but I've also spent time away in hotels and campers by myself before. I'm deathly afraid of ever going out in public, as I would die of shame I think, and would suffer greatly if I ever saw anyone whom I knew who may also recognize me.

I've also been interested in robotic-male substitution, and have even started a "homebrew" project along those lines, but battery power has its limits out in the environs.

My Femme preferences are as follows;

Hair: Red, shoulder length and straight or tied up.

Jewelry: Some; clip on earrings (as I've never gone for piercing), a necklace, watch/bracelet, ring.

Makeup: I've done lipstick before, and would like to try more stuff, but I'm inexperienced and find that it's not easy to do in the woods and can be hard to take off afterwards.

Outer Wear: suits with blouses, slacks and skirts, swimsuits, and gowns/dresses. I really like just about any kind of womens apparel but I have to narrow it down to the basics and ease of afford-ability/acquisition.

'Unmentionables': Guess...(heh).

Footwear: I prefer high heeled shoes and boots with four inch or higher heels, but I like most any kind of lady's footwear.

My Femme Measurements:

Hat: 7 1/4" to 7 1/2" (I have some hats).

Breast: 38J

Waist: 34" to 36" (I should lose a little weight, but all women seem to think so...heh).

Thigh: 40-42" or so (as I don't actually remember right now) but I would be interested in enhancements there as well, but have never tried any, as I'm quite 'pert' in the posterior, but not significantly so.

Size: somewhere between a 12 and a 16. My breast size can be a problem though, and usually results in having to go for the largest blouse sizes and then doing a bit of tailoring afterwards (I've taught myself to sew.)

Shoe: Size 11 1/2 to 12 inch (US) seems to do the trick.

Oh, and I prefer 'large' "pseudo-men" but enjoy all races, creeds and 'sizes'. ;)

Lastly, I'll say that I'm actually quite in acceptance with what I feel. and have simply chosen to privately enjoy it, although it'd be fun to expand my boundaries a bit, if I can maintain my anonymity , hence my coming here, too unload and share I suppose. And to figure out my particular label, simply for my own edification, if nothing else.

Thanks for your perseverance.

With love,

Glenda Deglerious

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Guest deglerious

Are you looking for a date?

Tell us a bit more about yourself.

I'm not here for dating really, just for answers and camaraderie, what may come, may come, but I'm not terribly enthusiastic about losing my anonymity or cheating on my SO at this time, although a party might be fun to attend, down the road.

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Guest Amethyst_Redemption

GOOD!!!! We tend to not tolerate that kind of thing.

Welcome and I really hope you find you place and your voice. Glad to have you here.

April

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Hi Glenda

Welcome to Laura's Playground. Based on your introduction there might be something here for you.... I know it took me the better part of a lifetime to face this part of my life without feelings of shame or guilt, so I get what that's all about. The good news for me is that when I started dealing with stuff, my behavior changed and then the feelings about myself changed too. Being here was a part of that process for me and perhaps it will serve you as well. I must say that the idea of doing things in the woods sounds a little risky by my standards. In my part of the country you'd be surprised who else might be in the woods...Yikes! I guess I liked my closets to be indoors, lol!

Some of the spouse/SO forum might be of interest too. The whole issue of what and when to tell loved ones can be very troubling, driven by fear of loss, yet knowing deception is bad for a relationship... its a tough balancing act, isn't it...

Anyway, I hope your journey around the playground is a rewarding one. I think you will find most of the parties here are of the cyber type, but that's how it works at Laura's :)

Best wishes

Michelle

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Guest miss kindheart

Hi Glenda,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)

We have Cross Dressers meetings -Tues 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

:wub: vanna

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Guest deglerious

Hi Glenda,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)

We have Cross Dressers meetings -Tues 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

:wub: vanna

I'll see if I can get the time to do it, still figuring things out here, thanks for the invite.

With love,

Glenda Deglerious

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Guest deglerious

Hi Glenda

Welcome to Laura's Playground. Based on your introduction there might be something here for you.... I know it took me the better part of a lifetime to face this part of my life without feelings of shame or guilt, so I get what that's all about. The good news for me is that when I started dealing with stuff, my behavior changed and then the feelings about myself changed too. Being here was a part of that process for me and perhaps it will serve you as well. I must say that the idea of doing things in the woods sounds a little risky by my standards. In my part of the country you'd be surprised who else might be in the woods...Yikes! I guess I liked my closets to be indoors, lol!

Some of the spouse/SO forum might be of interest too. The whole issue of what and when to tell loved ones can be very troubling, driven by fear of loss, yet knowing deception is bad for a relationship... its a tough balancing act, isn't it...

Anyway, I hope your journey around the playground is a rewarding one. I think you will find most of the parties here are of the cyber type, but that's how it works at Laura's :)

Best wishes

Michelle

Thanks much, still learning the ropes here, will try to improve.

With Love,

Glenda Deglerious

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  • 2 months later...
  • 2 weeks later...
Guest deglerious

I am brand new here and I can certainly relate to wanting to stay hidden and having an attraction to women's clothes and to toys..

We seem to share the same interests. It'd be interesting to compare notes.

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Guest deglerious

I am brand new here and I can certainly relate to wanting to stay hidden and having an attraction to women's clothes and to toys..

We seem to share the same interests. It'd be interesting to compare notes.

Happy Valentines Day!

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest rita63

I can undestand your story, its not that different from mine, your never really alone at Laura's. Now, single after 30+ years married I am free to dress and explore my femme side. I can never make the Tuesday night chat but I hope to run into you here and share.

hugs rita

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Guest deglerious

I can undestand your story, its not that different from mine, your never really alone at Laura's. Now, single after 30+ years married I am free to dress and explore my femme side. I can never make the Tuesday night chat but I hope to run into you here and share.

hugs rita

I'm sadly probably not going to make the chat, as my schedule won't really allow it. But it's nice to have a prospective pen pall. maybe we can compare notes...
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Guest josrphine

Hi , Well most of what u did I also tried. My life did not include the sex part. I do dress all the way now, have priced ears as I love to wear all kinds of ear rings. I have a women that loves me as a women so I have the best of both worlds. JO

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