It all started with a pair of panties.

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

My earliest memories, I always new something was different about me from the other boys. I didnt enjoy "boy" things as much. Well maybe more than a girl my age but I enjoyed "girl" things a lot more than a typical boy. I always thought that girls were lucky to be able to wear such pretty things.

One day when I was around 14 or so I found a pair of panties at the bottom of the swimming pool at the local Moose Lodge. I snuck them out and, after they dried, started wearing them. That is when I started wishing I had been born a girl. It really confused me because though; I was attracted to girls and not to boys. I still had times I would dream of being a girl. Just dressing up and being friends with the other girls. Well not too long after I started wearing them, my mom kind of cought me. She noticed I had something colorfull on underneath my shorts. When she asked I told her they were another pair of shorts and took them off as soon as possible. I dont know if she believed me but she never mentioned them again and I never wore them again.

Well for the next 7 years or so, all I did was dream again. That was when I moved in with a friend and his wife. They went out of town for the weekend and I fully dressed in his wife's clothes. Man, what a rush. I decided to go out but chickened out a little and wore a full length rain coat over it. Still it was a rush, and I felt so... something I cant figure out how to say, like free. But that was the only time.

Shortly after that I married and had two great children. I finally worked up the nerve to mention to my wife about wearing girls clothes. She let me wear a pair of her panties for a little before telling me to take them off because it feaked her out. Come to find out her first love of her life, broke up with her and came out of the closet. In her mind that was happening all over again. I tried to assure her it wasnt but she wouldnt listen to me.

The last 14 or so years I have dressed up in the house and snuck panties every now and then when going out but it has all been done by myself. I am not sure what it is but in the last few months the desire to be a woman has surfaced again and was driving me to distration. That is when I finally started researching things. I was amazed and releaved to find out there was nothing odd about me being attracted to women and still wanting to be a woman. And the more I think about it, I dont think it is that I am not attracted to men it is just when I see a man, all that comes to my mind is him showing disgust and contempt at me and my life style.

Well there it is, my whole story. More might be jogged from my memory with questions and I look forward to them. Thanx for listening.

[Guest Donna Jean]

...Amanda........

Your title for this post really cracked me up......

But I understand the seriousness of it all.....

Trust me.......I've been there, too........

I'm transitioned now and live full time at 62 years old.....

Dee Jay

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Thanx.

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Amanda,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We have MTF meetings-Mon & Sat 9pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Sorry Vanna, I would LOVE to chat but my computer just wont load the java required. I have tried numerous times but no luck. So no chatting for me.

[Guest Juniper Blue]

Great post Amanda. What an interesting beginning ... great title ... made me laugh! You write very well.

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Aww thanx.

[Guest Maitane]

Hello I want to add a tid bit of myself to this. I wanted to come out years age and proclaim that I was trapped in a mans body. Well I am now 1 person at a time mind you but I feel totally at peace now anyway I started wearing my step daughters thongs yes Iam tucking but I feel so wonderful I even wore her jeans yes they fit wonderfully I love the feel of finally steping out mind you its a baby step but oh I can walk.

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

I am happy for you!!!

[Guest KristaCA]

Amanda

What a great title. That hits close to my heart.. I t so exhilating when I bought my first panties. Thank you for post your post.

<<Hugs>>

Krista

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Thank you Krista.

Hugz,

Mandy

[Guest Lacey Lynne]

Amanda:

Wanna read A FANTASTICALLY GOOD book in which pages you'll so see yourself that it will amaze you? You've just gotta see this one. Please, read the 5-star and 4-star reviews. The author is the significant other of a crossdresser/transsexual (who actually began hormones) and is a simply splendid writer! You'll love this book, I believe:

http://www.amazon.com/Shes-Not-Man-Married-Transgender/dp/1580051936/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328417814&sr=1-1

Like Dee Jay said, so many of us on here have SOOO "been there" just like you. Heck, we me it all started with a ladies' bracelet and perfume. Jeesh! You've got PLENTY of company on this website, Amanda! You really do.

Peace Lacey

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Thanx Lacey, I will have to look it up. I really appreciate everyone here and all the support I have been given.

Mandy

[gennee]

Hi Amanda. You story is similar to mine. I started out with a skirt. It was only 6 1/2 years ago and I was in my mid fifties!

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Gennee, I am seeing how a lot of us transgender people have similar stories but with different specifics.

[Guest Wendae]

Yep, mom's panties at age 9 and that was 61 years ago.

[Guest Amanda Whyte]

Lol, believe it or not I never did mom or sister's panties. That grossed me out for some reason.