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Hrt hoping it will decrease dysphoria.


Guest Krisina

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Guest Krisina

I'm hoping that hrt will decrease my dysphoria, even if it's only a low dose.

Ideally, curves, skinnier on top, some breast growth, more feminine looking face. Inner peace, stress lowered by proper balance of hormones.

Krisina

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Krisina,

Any news on when you might start HRT?

I've got my fingers crossed for you, lol..

I believe HRT CAN do what you wish, but there is only one way to know at this point...

Love and anticipation, Svenna

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Guest Krisina

I've asked for a referral letter,that should be done before the end of the month. I want to try hrt to see if it helps. I don't have plans on going ft at the moment. After that the endriocronolgist I'm interested in has a waiting list or so I heard last year. It might have decreased. I'm more interested in getting someone who is very knowledgeable that I can get along with rather than picking the first one available. It could be a couple of months, but I'm just guessing at this point.

I don't post on here very often. Tired and life in the way.

Krisina

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Guest Melanie54

Well I can say that in my experience it did help. =) About two days after I started just kinda didn't feel wrong anymore. I want to say this is probably biological and not a placebo effect but I could be wrong. While I did and still do feel much better my body dysphoria pretty much skyrocketed. <.< It seems like now that my brain works it got a hold of itself took a look at what was going on, saw the body and was all like "Really? I mean just come on."

I guess the moral of that rambling was that in my experience they did indeed help but once you get past that you just run into other problems lol.

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  • Forum Moderator

Hi Krisina

Dysphoria is a word that was not in my vocabulary until fairly recently.

Did I feel uncomfortable about my internal gender identity before starting HRT ? Yes

Did it help these feelings ? Yes

Did they go away ? No

This is all subjective I realize, but what I am experiencing now is more intense cycles of dysphoria. I have many good days, but about 1 or 2 per month I can really say are dysphoric. When it does come, it's more intense now. I see real progress in my changes, and I feel really good about them, however sometimes the dysphoria comes in the form of wanting the changes to happen faster. I also feel increasingly uncomfortable about certain body parts still being there, others report this as well. It seems the further down this path you go, what seemed less important before, has become more important now.

Would I change anything looking back ? NO

Good luck with obtaining your medical assistance and sorting this all out.

Hugs

Cindy -

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  • Forum Moderator

Hi Krisina,

In a way that's a tough question for me because the answer is yes and no. T and the changes in my brain brought a measure of peace and rightness I have never known. My lifelong suicidal depression is gone except for very brief episodes that I think are sort of habitual responses but last just a day or so compared to it being a default state in many ways. I am right with my world in a way I can't describe. Things make sense that never did before. And that is worth any price I could pay except for causing my family pain-but though they have struggled in the end it has had the opposite effect because they can see the change in me and they love me and because I can be there for them now in ways I couldn't before.

BUT it did increase the body dysphoria in ways I didn't anticipate. I reconnected with my body. No longer hate it and despise it as an enemy in my life despite the problems I have with it that are not gender but health related. I own it now as I did not in a way before. But instead of hating my body I now really hate parts of it and am acutely uncomfortable with them in a way I was not before.

It's a trade off. But one where I actually came out way, way ahead.

I hope that HRT brings you the peace and rightness that T has brought me. I didn't really doubt how my brain was wired before but if I had that alone would have convinced me.

Hugs

Johnny

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  • Admin

It was 18 months after beginning my E that I came out to people beyond the ones who knew I had cross dressed on an occasional basis. Most of my CD acquaintances never got the news of the E until the rest of society did.

Getting the referal for Endo was itself a big weight off my mind and a relief of so much stress. Over the first two months on a rock bottom dose (so the doctor could see if I would negatively react) my mind simply drifted off of the things I had found in the forefront of my dysphoria. Emotionally, I did feel overall changes, I was quicker to hear emotions in other people's lives, and was less edgy around people in general. (I think it did affect my pheromone reception a bt). I first experienced some new nerve sensitivity in my upper chest, and happily found a male reflex was no longer operating which made me happy. I have just found that my overall body is operating better and more harmoniously than ever before. Skin, some shape, hair, personal sense of smell, and body odor have changed. I am now at 31 months and no way I am going back.

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