Makeup purchases online in Australia

[Guest Jenny_W]

Hey everyone,

Does anyone know a good site to purchase makeup in Australia? I know there are probably lots of good ones overseas but I don't really want to wait the time it takes to ship items to here. I am currently half way through a 7-week wait for some dresses from the US and it's killing me!

I guess I am still a little self conscious when shopping for make-up in the stores. I'd like to take my time and choose carefully, mostly because I don't want to waste my money. My wife (recently became my ex-wife) is fully supportive of my dressing but she isn't going to be the one helping me choose products now or into the future.

Anyway, some tips would be good.

Jenny

[Guest CariadsCarrot]

I don't know any advice to give you about buying make up anywhere or buying anything in Australia but I wanted to sympathise about the waiting time for shipping from overseas. I've found that I've had to order things that way a fair bit as I'm transitioning so far. The UK does not seem to be aware of how big an FTM market they could have over here (I don't know about MTF's coz I haven't tried shopping for those things but I'd imagine it's similarly dismal).

Even basic things like the right kind of medicine spoons (used to make an STP) aren't available over here and you'd think a medicine spoon would be fairly universal! And even Ebay has more stuff on the '.com' than the '.co.uk' site. I was shocked to find that one out!

Let's hope that someone twigs on to the demand both over there for you and over here for us and fills in the gaps. And I hope that someone is able to answer your questions about what IS available over there for you.

Best of luck and have fun shopping when you find out where to get things.

Gabe

[Guest Jenny_W]

Thanks Gabe,

I know that I'm not making it easy for myself - I could just walk into any store and buy all the cosmetics that I want - if I had total confidence. It's just not that easy. I was shopping today in our local supermarket with my 4yo daughter. I rolled into the cosmetics aisle and I spotted face wipes were on special, so I grabbed some.

My daughter quite loudly asked, "what are those Daddy?".

Calmy, I replied "they are to clean your face with - you know - so that you have good skin".

"Who are they for?". A slight pause.

"They're for me" and I felt quite OK because if anyone else heard my reply they probably thought: "There's a man who knows how to look after himself", and I will never lie to my daughter.

I also grabbed some Nair on the way past (first time I have purchased this product). Not noticed by Little Miss.

And wouldn't you know it, my ex-wife was also shopping and she came up behind me not 2 minutes later!

"Hi, how are you?"

"Great - just doing the weekly shop...blah, blah..."

She followed me to the checkout and watched me take out all the items. Now, she knows I dress and she would have laughed had she seen the Nair and face wipes. It would have been no big deal. Anyone else would have thought that I was buying for her!

However, my heart rate was up and I guess it's not yet second nature to purchase these things, let alone foundation, lipstick or nail polish.

It does get easier - I can buy tights with hardly any increase in anxiety, not so a few months ago. Most people probably don't care, or if they notice they probably think they're for someone else, because which man in his right mind would be buying tights for himself?

Hmmmm, aren't other people's assumptions interesting?

Jenny

[Guest CariadsCarrot]

I totally understand Jenny. I think most people do naturally assume that we're buying things for someone else coz 'oh look there's a transexual/crossdresser' really isn't the first logical place any cis person's mind goes (they might tease you as a joke if they're on those kind of friendly terms with you but they wouldn't seriously work it out) but to us EVERY SINGLE thing we do feels like a great flashing sign over our heads!

It's funny coz now I'm at the stage of wanting to pass as male and every time I get read female I find myself looking at myself and adding up all the male pointers I've got that day and wondering how it's not obvious to people that I'm TRYING to look like a man (shirt and tie...check...boys hair cut...check...unshaven legs...check...)..and I find myself thinking 'well couldn't they at least HUMOUR me with a couple of sir's even if I'm failing at passing coz it's obvious what I WANT to be seen as!'

Now when I buy something like shaving tools I want another man to look at me and feel a sense of kameraderie (do guys even do that?) that we are blokes buying men's stuff together!...they probably just think I'm buying it for my teenage sons who are often with me. It was a good excuse when I wanted to blend in to female-hood though

Thing is to us it's SO obvious to US and another transperson would probably join the dots pretty easily...but it's not on most cis people's radar!

I still understand the feelings though and I don't think you're silly for getting your stuff online instead at all.

Maybe a day will come sometime in the future when your daughter's older and you and she can go shopping being girls together sharing the experience like my sons and I do now rather than her, with the innocence only childhood can have, being like one of those distress beacons to point you out to the whole shop

Gabe

[Guest Jenny_W]

Gabe,

I have never considered what it will be like when my daughter is older! Wow, that sounds great - going out as girls together and sharing a bond. It's inevitable that I will tell her (when she's old enough) and I hope she will embrace it openly - if I have parented her well. So, I guess we could end up going out together.

I suppose everyone feels that it would be great to have a mentor - someone who could shop with them, give them tips and reassurance. I would find that useful right now!

Re: what men think when they're buying shaving products alongside other men - not much really. They're probably just thinking "how can razor blades be this expensive?! Maybe I should grow a beard...." then they pick up the same brand they've used for years and keep going...

You've got more guts than me to go out in public...maybe one day

Jenny